Infant and Pregnancy Loss Awareness Day

luciddreamer106 · October 2014

For those of you who will be posting something tomorrow on social media, what do you plan on saying?

I haven't really decided exactly, but I want to post one of the pictures that the ladies on TTCAL put together, something about the day, and then a link of how to be supportive. These are two links I found that I like, but I haven't decided on which to post: What NOT to Say After a Miscarriage or Child Loss and Miscarriage-What to Say. Or maybe neither if I find something I like better.

What are you planning on doing?

Edited to fix link, thanks @blackbird818

little_kate · October 2014

I've been participating in Carly Marie's 'Capture Your Grief' project all month, and posting articles that particularly hit me as well. In all honesty, my Facebook friends are probably ready for October to be over. Tomorrow, I will likely just post my photo for the daily project, and in the evening, post a photo of our candle, during the wave of light.

blackbird818 · October 2014

Lucid I just wanted to let you know your 2 links go to the say article. I was reading them to see about maybe posting one tomorrow as well.

I have changed my cover pic to a pregnancy & loss awareness month image. Not sure what exactly I'm going to post tomorrow.

longcat07 · October 2014

it's funny (not "lol" funny...maybe ironic?) because i just had my loss last spring, but i used to post to FB on october 15 every year anyway, in support of very good friends who've had multiple losses and one who lost twin girls about halfway through the 2T, in an effort to remove the stigma and taboo from the subject.

i'm not sure i'll be outing myself this year. i may never out myself...my nearest and dearest know about my loss and that's what i'm comfortable with. (if someone asked me point blank or shared their own story, i wouldn't lie, but i'm not going to volunteer the information.) but i still want to do my part to continue to try to raise awareness. i'll probably stick with my usual...remembering all the babies never held, all the babies who never went home, all the babies who DID go home but not for long...and a reminder that talking about loss shouldn't be taboo, and that you never know who around you may have experienced a loss and is afraid to speak up because "nobody wants to hear about that".

do you all think it's hypocritical of me to post that but still not share about my own loss? honest question, please give it to me straight if you think so.

edit: grammar derp

blackbird818 · October 2014

@longcat07 I don't think that is hypocritical AT ALL. I think that's incredible that you were so thoughtful & sincere to post that before experiencing a loss yourself. What a supportive and loving friend you are!!

jesswein9 · October 2014

I'm torn about what to do and thought you all might be able to shed some light. I'm 13 weeks and haven't made my pregnancy FB official and don't plan on doing that until Halloween. Would it be weird for me to just change my picture to the pregnancy/infant loss ribbon tomorrow and announce my pregnancy 2 weeks later? I just want to be sensitive to friends who may be struggling with IF or losses that I don't know about. I also have thought about not posting anything tomorrow and just posting a remembrance message for my 3 babies lost at the same time as my announcement. What would you do?

Samuelismomma · October 2014

I am planning on posting links and pics about loss. My nearest and dearest know about myself but I'm not officially outing...

kate6214 · October 2014

I'm going to make a personal post. I do not plan on announcing this pregnancy at all on Facebook, but I really want to bring awareness about loss. It's such an uncomfortable topic for people and I want the help others understand.

alleycat39 · October 2014

I decided to just go for it and do a public post on FB, including DH in it too. We are open about our losses and hope that by posting, it will encourage others to reach out if they find themselves going through similar situations. Here is the graphic I used.

lyndz333 · October 2014

Only my mom and sister know about both losses. For some lame reason I just can't bring myself to discuss it openly with people just yet. I think the emotions are still too new for me and I'm afraid of my own reaction to others' reactions. For example, after our first loss we told My MIL and later on, his aunt and uncle with whom he is very close; his mom made a dumbass comment to me shortly thereafter which DH tried to waive off as his awkward mothers attempt at conversation and his uncle seemed very dismissive. Both instances were hurtful and in the case with his mom I hate to bite my tongue to stop from asking her what into the world she was thinking with her comment. I'm worried that if people extend anything other than their sympathies I will react badly. Hopefully one day this will be a non-issue for me. I admire you ladies who are so open about it.

paintdadanta · October 2014

I shared my loss only recently on fb and received almost all positive and supportive feedback. However, others like my MIL were not so supportive. Deciding to open up is a very personal choice and not for everyone but for those who want to do something without outing themselves what about something like this (not the best graphic but still gets the point across):

Unknown · October 2014

This content has been removed.

nohalo21 · October 2014

@jesswein9‌ I'm in the same boat. I can't decide what I want to do. I am 22w and still haven't made it public. I have had two friends that have suffered losses very recently. I feel like announcing right now is inappropriate, but I know they are happy for me. Everyone close to me knows about this pregnancy, so it's not a secret. I have been very upfront about losing my daughter and have posted several things recently and in the last.

My profile pic is a white butterfly that reminds me of my daughter. That I've used since my due date back in August. I am thinking of changing it to a pic of the pumpkins we picked and dressing them to be our family.

little_kate · October 2014

I think everyone posts what they are comfortable posting (with regards to the question about if it was hypocritical not to 'out' yourself)... Had my loss been under different circumstances, I'm not sure I would be as open about it. But we went to the hospital fully anticipating that we would leave with a baby, and there was no way of hiding that.

I think any small gesture of support to spread awareness in general is worthwhile... you've got to grieve & process within your own comfort zone.

jesswein9 · October 2014

Well, I posted this morning and left it pretty general. I think I will share more about my specific story like @meladoriestar‌ did when I come public about this pregnancy. For now this is what I posted....

Remembering all the babies never held, all the babies who never went home, and all the babies who DID go home but not for long.
#breakthesilence Pregnancy and infant loss effects 1 in 4 women.

For those that find a friend or family member in the midst of a loss- please do them and yourselves a favor and read the below article.

https://adrielbooker.com/care-for-a-friend-after-miscarriage-or-stillbirth/

Please share and break the taboo of talking about miscarriages and infant loss.

--feel free to take bits and pieces or all if you want. Hugs to everyone today who is coming out or putting yourself in a somewhat vulnerable place.

I'm sure people on my FB feed will make assumptions based on my post and that's just fine.

SpartyKim · October 2014

I outed myself on FB with the following: "Thinking about everyone today who's ever suffered an early miscarriage, a late loss, a stillbirth, or an infant loss. While it's painful to speak about, you should never be ashamed that it happened because it happens more often than people expect/know. I encourage you to leave a comment if you or your spouse have experienced a loss like this." (with an image of the Pregnancy & Infant Loss ribbon but I can't get it to load here) And then in the comments, I said that I've had two miscarriages.

E&B0811 · October 2014

Some of my friends that have experienced losses have posted this on FB today

mpiemont · October 2014

This is my FB post....

matiekae · October 2014

@jesswein9 thank you for sharing, you put into words what I couldn't. That was exactly what I wanted to post today.

JustinsGirl2011 · October 2014

I posted this today on Facebook...

"There is no foot too small to leave an imprint on this world."

I thought it was a good way to not only remember my angel, but others as well. A lot of people have been sharing their stories today and/or posting similar images. It's nice to see everyone come together to remember our little angels that we never got to meet or that left the world too soon. Big ((HUGS)) to everyone today!

Want a personalized experience?

Infant and Pregnancy Loss Awareness Day

Re: Infant and Pregnancy Loss Awareness Day

Choose Another Board

Search Boards