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Emotional during sex

FigureSkater8FigureSkater8 member
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
OK this is pretty hard to write but last night DH and I tried for the first time since the D&C, which was 18 days ago.  I thought I wanted to...because I wanted to feel close to him again (emotionally etc).  But then when we started...I got emotional and started crying.  He was so kind about it.  Anyone else?  I can't disassociate sex from what has happened...Anyone have experience or advice?  How can it be fun again without me feeling guilty or sad?

Thanks-

  Me:36, DH:37

DS born 11/2012

BFP 7/26/14, Missed M/C at 8 weeks, discovered at 10 wks, 6 days, D&C 9/22/14, Dx: Partial molar pregnancy

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Re: Emotional during sex

  • nikiswimrnikiswimr member
    I get this completely. We're so far away from even attempting it but for me it is still emotionally tied to our lost baby. Sorry you're having a difficult time right now.
    Me: 32 DH: 32
    Met: 4/25/2004, Married 8/14/2010
    Off BC 1/2013 TTC (actively) since 5/2013
    5/2014 started testing with RE, me:  HSG normal, normal AMH, no cysts; DH: great sperm
    Unexplained IF + unexplained anovulation (post-pill vs hypothalamic)

    7/2014 Clomid (monitored) + TI: BFN
    8/2014 Clomid (monitored) + TI: BFP #1: 9/12/2014, EDD 5/22/2015, MMC 10/11/2014 8w1d
    11/2014 Clomid + Novarel + IUI 12/5/14: BFFN
    12/2014 Comid + Novarel + IUI 1/3/15: ???

    **PgAL/PAL welcome**

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  • flyoffeveflyoffeve member
    Sorry you are having a difficult time. We have not been able to dance yet after this mc, but I remember experiencing this after my first mc. I would just start crying because I associated it with what happened and it really made me think about the baby we lost. DH was supportive thinking I was being hurt, but it was just emotional. It gets better with time. My advice would be to appreciate the love from dh and allow yourself to cry during if it happens. It will get fun again.

    Me: 31 DH: 36
    Dated Since ‘02, Married in ‘06
    BFP#1 05/16/06, EDD01/16/07, MC 06/12/06 at 8 weeks
    BFP #2 08/14/14, EDD 04/22/15, MC 09/17/14 at 9 weeks

    image 

     My Chart

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  • tamlyndtamlynd member
    I was extremely emotional the first time we had sex post our miscarriage. I just cried and had tears streming down my face. I wanted to be close to hubby so much . we wanted each other so badly (in a beautiful way) and when we were on the 2nd weekend after our miscarriage, we went away for the night to just be together and bond etc. It was very emotionally healing for us. We needed to just get away.Today it is 6 weeks since we lost our precious. Today I finally got my period!!! 6 weeks later. I have been emotional a few times whilst love making since the first , and its ok. Hubby understands. Xxx give yourself time, your man loves you xxx
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  • katie0919katie0919 member
    We just had sex for the first time since my natural miscarriage on Friday (it was also 18 days post beginning of the miscarriage). Honestly, I probably would have been emotional, but I had a lot of wine (I've been drinking my emotions away on the weekends) and that made it a lot easier to do it. I felt more open and excited about the idea of having sex. Maybe try to share a bottle of bubbly before hand? Put on romantic music....do anything to look at sex as being for you and DH, instead of being for making a baby? I know it's so hard, hang in there. xo
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Me: 37 DH: 38 
    BFP #1 3/17/11 - DS born 12/4/11
    TFAS Dec 2013
    BFP #2 - 3/23/14 - CP 3/26/14
    BFP #3 - 8/20/14 - Natural Miscarriage 9/22/14
    BFP #4 - 1/28/15 - DS2 born 10/13/15
    Surprise BFP# 5 - 9/2/16 - Due 5/13/17

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