Confused on who to invite?

mellizzard · October 2014

I have 4 amazing hostesses throwing me a baby shower, and they've started asking for the list of people to invite. I'm a FTM, so I'm not really sure what is the "proper thing" to do in regards to who to invite to a baby shower.

Long story short, I'm not very close with my mother's side of the family. When I got married, I mailed all of them wedding invitations, but only heard from a few (there's a whole lot of them). I know none of them would actually attend my baby shower (they all live out of state anyways), so I'm confused on if I should even bother sending them an invite? In all honesty, they probably wouldn't even recognize who the shower is for considering they probably don't know my married last name...

So, my question is: Do I invite my female family members (grandmother, aunts, cousins) from my mother's side regardless if I think they'd show or not?

Helenahhandbasket · October 2014

I probably would not, if they don't even know your married name.

mellizzard · October 2014

ClaryPax said:

If you don't think they will attend, and they live out of state then I probably would not invite them. Also, ask your mom what she thinks if she thinks any of them would like an invite. I personally don't mind and appreciate out of state invites, but I don't think that is the norm. I get invited to very few showers, so it doesn't bother me to be invited to one that it is out of state. But many people feel like "why are they inviting me they know I can't drive that far anyway."

I probably should've mentioned it, but my mom passed away several years ago.

Even though I'm sure none would show, I don't want to appear rude for not inviting them... It's almost like a lose-lose situation.

mellizzard · October 2014

somerandomchick said:

It's not a milestone event like a wedding so you don't have to courtesy-invite people. It actually looks a little gift-grabby to invite somebody to bring you gifts if you never talk to them If you end up sending out birth announcements, include them in that. But for a shower def not.

This!! You solved my confusion - thanks

VOR · October 2014

Yup - not a huge event like a wedding. Showers are your "nearest and dearest". Not "everyone you know".

Confused on who to invite?

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