Bad news about my surgery ...devastated

wanderlust508 · October 2014

As I've told you guys before, I had laparoscopic surgery scheduled to remove my fibroids on 11/5. I've been taking Lupron for 2 months to shrink the fibroids beforehand (took 2nd dose 9/25). Well, I got a phone call from the GYN's office .....my surgery will have to be postponed indefinitely because the Dr who was supposed to do my surgery got injured. They said they expected her to be back in 2 months but "couldn't say for sure". I was in shock ....I was at work at the time I got the message and immediately burst into tears at my cubicle (embarrassing). I went into my supervisor's office and asked if I could take the rest of the day off. Luckily she was super sympathetic and told me to go home. Drove home (while talking to hubby on the phone and crying to him) and now here I am planted in front of my laptop ....tears (and mascara) running down my face with a HUGE glass of wine in my hands.

I was taking the stupid Lupron and enduring all the hot flashes and headaches for this surgery on 11/5. And now it is fucking isn't gonna happen!!!! I wanna scream and throw things right now. I emailed my RE's office (even though they aren't involved in the actual surgery) and asked if they knew of anyone else they could refer me to in order to get this surgery done. Hopefully they have someone for me ....I don't know how long my original Dr will be out and I'm guessing I probably shouldn't wait to find out. This is so frustrating. To say that this has been a rough year is a huge understatement. I just feel so lost and don't know where to go from here. I had the timeline in my head ....surgery in November. Resume TTC in February (3 months after surgery) .....and maybe, just maybe get my BFP before my 35th birthday in May. Well that isn't gonna fucking happen!!!!!!!

OK back to my huge glass of wine.

TTCBabyJ · October 2014

I'm so sorry you received such horrible news today and at work for that matter. It seems like they should have a replacement at your OB/GYN's office. You should not have to wait until your original surgeon returns. It really breaks my heart to read this, I know exactly what it feels like for something outside of your control to throw a monkey wrench in your timeline.

You deserve that glass of wine tonight. Thank goodness your supervisor let you go home early. Be kind to yourself.

Eta: spelling

Hollowvic · October 2014

I'm sorry, how frustrating. Is there any way you can possibly find another doctor? Relax and drink your wine, I know I'm no help, but wanted to send you some support. ((Hugs))

dominicandreamer · October 2014

I'm so sorry this happened. Definitely find out if you can get another surgeon to work on you. Even if it's delayed a little bit, that's better than indefinitely.

:::hugs::: while you wait for answers.

LindseyM2012 · October 2014

I am so sorry you have to go through this!! Sending good thoughts and huge hugs!!!!

Shauntee · October 2014

I am so sorry to hear about this news. Sending hugs your way.

BandM14 · October 2014

I'm so sorry you got this bad news. I completely understand why you are so devastated. I really hope you can get a referral to another amazing surgeon who can get you in quickly.

dancerspose · October 2014

I am so sorry! Take a deep breath, big sip of wine and let yourself mourn for a bit for this setback. Hopefully you're RE will come up with someone else who can do the surgery. I'm sending you lots of ((HUGS)) and positive thoughts!

SuzyHomemaker07 · October 2014

Hoping they call back early with a referral. Cheers from my glass of wine to yours

lebradford · October 2014

I'm so sorry. I hate how so much of this is beyond our control. I really hope you can find someone to do the surgery much sooner. In the meantime, I know it's going to be hard waiting to figure out a new plan, so all of the wine and hugs to you.

TLooney17 · October 2014

That is horrible! But there have to be multiple Drs who could do the surgery. Hugs & I hope you find a replacement soon.

theholmanherd · October 2014

Oh, honey. I'm so very sorry. Cry all you need. Get some chocolate and more wine. Have hubby bring you comfort food. Watch trashy movies (or comfort movies or shows....my go-to ones are the office, last holiday, and many others in multiple genres. I'm a savant...PM me for ideas), or listen to soothing music (or angry rock music), and take deep breaths. Do what makes you happy. Maybe get in some retail therapy or hiking this weekend. These are all things that have helped me. Also, Psalm 34:18 is wonderful. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted. He saves those are crushed in spirit.

Take care, East Bay.

[Deleted User] · October 2014

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mikeandnat · October 2014

Sending hugs and positive vibes your way. Hope you get another Dr who can come to the rescue.

mshandlebar · October 2014

At least this crappy day is almost over. I hope you get helpful news from your RE tomorrow. I wish you didn't have to go through this. None of this is fair, and I am so sorry.

l0v3 · October 2014

I'm so sorry

I burst into tears the last time my treatment plan was botched to. Drink up, lady! And I'll pray they find another surgeon to keep your plan on track.

dogshowgirl · October 2014

There, there..... (pats shoulder). You have every right to be frustrated and upset. That is like telling a child they are going Disney World and then saying "sorry, the Characters decided to go on strike so we can't go". :-( BUT your determination set in and at least you got right back to focusing on what you want. Kudos to you girl! I am hear if you want to talk/vent.

mrskimmell · October 2014

I am so sorry you have to go through all of this. But you are taking all of the right steps. And your right you shouldn't have to wait around to find out for sure when your original surgeon will be back. All you can do it take it one step at a time. Be up set cuz well it's a shitty spot to be in. But don't be your self up. I'll be praying you can find someone who will do this for you soon!

mmmKayy · October 2014

So so sorry (((hugs)))

emmuffy · October 2014

I'm really sorry. Good luck in finding another doctor to do the surgery. I hope you can make some progress soon

Chasity08 · October 2014

I'm sorry about the terrible news. I hope your RE is able to recommend another surgeon for you. Go easy on yourself today.

wanderlust508 · October 2014

Thank you girls so much for all the support and kind words. Really, I'm so overwhelmed after reading all your responses. Lots of love to all of you. We're all fighting this IF battle and some days feel so low, it's a wonder we are able to even get out of bed. Luckily most days haven't been that bad for me so far ....but yesterday was a definite low point. It meant a lot to hear from some of you who can relate in some way to what I'm going through.

Today I'm still feeling low but have had a little more time to process it. This really really sucks. There's no denying that. I feel like the rug has been pulled out from under me and I'm in disbelief that my GYN's office is offering me no other option but to "wait and see" when my Dr returns and is able to do the surgery. That could take 6 months for all I know! ....yeah, not doing that. My RE responded to me and said she may have a Dr who could be able to get my surgery done sooner and she'll get back to me. I keep impatiently checking my email. No response yet and I'm driving myself insane. Sigh* ....having that surgery planned with a Dr I was really comfortable with is what has kept me going the last couple months. And now I feel like I'm back to square one.

shirleymaeby · October 2014

I am so, so, so sorry to hear this. I know you were way excited to have found this doctor in the first place and how upsetting it must be to find out you're being delayed yet again. I will keep my fingers and toes crossed that you are able to find another doctor to help you out so that you don't have to delay any further.

Seriously, fuck 2014. This year has been shit-tastic. All my hugs for you.

BunnyBerry · October 2014

NOOOoooo!! I am so sorry. I am praying that your RE has a great surgeon rec for you and this thing can get back on schedule. Such sad news. Take it easy on yourself this weekend.

mshandlebar · October 2014

This is unbelievably unfair! I hope they can find an equally awesome dr. to do your surgery. This IF business can be a real kick in the face. Many hugs and much wine for you!

lebradford · October 2014

I'm glad your RE might have a backup plan. I hope they get back to you soon. Keep us posted.

tumbleweed123 · October 2014

I'm so sorry. This sucks beyond belief and is just totally unfair. I am crossing fingers that your RE gives you an awesome referral ASAP and that you get to have the surgery on time and with another great doctor. (((hugs)))

SweetieShellieH · October 2014

I'm so sorry I hope it can be rescheduled ASAP.

wanderlust508 · October 2014

Thanks again girls!

@DaydreamSam - you are so sweet. Thanks so much for sharing those links. Unfortunately because I'm a Kaiser Permanente member, I think my options are limited to those within the KP network. I so wish they'd cover my surgery with an outside provider!! Especially considering my circumstances.

Update: My RE set me up with a different OB-gyn who does laparoscopic myomectomy. That OB emailed me and said she'd be happy to take over my surgery. She said she was pretty sure she could complete it laparoscopic but "it will be a very difficult surgery". I went ahead and accepted12/1 as my new surgery date with her to get something on the books. But honestly, I'm not crazy about her so far. My Dr who got injured instilled way more confidence in me. Even after seeing me and feeling my abdomen & doing a pelvic exam, she said she had no doubt she could complete it laparoscopic. And that she'd done far more difficult cases than mine. Ugh so sad to lose her. Back when I first got referred to her, I'd gotten in touch with a gyn who is considered THE one to see for minimally invasive gyn surgery. She was on maternity leave so she referred me to the Dr I last saw (who ended up getting injured). I realized that I still had her personal cell number(Dr on maternity leave) so I texted her yesterday. I told her I had a new surgery date set with Dr C. But that I'd appreciate her feedback on whether she felt that Dr C could handle my case. Or if she recommended anyone else. I felt bad bugging her while she's on maternity leave. But she was so nice! She told me she had operated with Dr C before ... And while she was very good, she would recommend I see Dr O instead. He is fellowship trained in advanced gyn surgery and renowned for his skill in the bay area. She said she'd send my info to him and he'd contact me soon. I looked up his profile online and his resume is definitely more impressive than Dr C! I think if all goes well, I will probably cancel my surgery with Dr C and reschedule with Dr O (hopefully he has dates available in Nov or Dec). Thank god for having a gyn who is nice enough to help me even when she's on maternity leave!! ....this all just might work out for me.

wanderlust508 · October 2014

Geez, if I end up going with Dr O, he will be the 5th specialist I've seen or spoken to for these fibroids!! That just blows my mind.

This has no relevance but Dr O is also very cute! LOL

TTCBabyJ · October 2014

@EastBayBride508‌ Good luck with Dr. O. I also have Kaiser but I'm in Southern California, they are not the easiest system to navigate. But they do have some really great doctors throughout the network. That was so awesome for the doctor on maternity leave to give you a referral. Please keep us posted on the impending surgery date with Dr. O' Hottie....lol.

Ready4one · October 2014

I don't have much input or advice ... I just want to say that I hate that you are having to deal with this and I can completely understand your frustration ... when dealing with IF and all that comes with we have to be our own advocates because in IF it is still so new and misunderstood and BROAD that no 2 infertiles need the exact same thing ... so we have to fight for our personal battle :-) GOOD LUCK !! I hope to hear awesome updates on this soon

mshandlebar · October 2014

That is great news! I am so glad the maternity leave Dr. took the time to help you out. I for one would rather have a hot Dr. working on my lady bits any day! Also, because I have a twelve year old boy's sense of humour, I totally picture the deli scene from When Harry Met Sally when I read the name Dr. O. Anywho, fingers crossed that it works out!

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