Lurker/hopefully future member --talking to boss about maternity leave

Re: Lurker/hopefully future member --talking to boss about maternity leave

• shakinros member

  October 2014

  I don't think I'd mention coworkers angling for your job while you're on maternity leave. I think that will come out sounding paranoid and catty, no matter how casually you say it. Just stick with reinforcing how much you'll be looking forward to coming back at the end of maternity leave.
  
  What are they doing for coverage for your job while you're at? You could also offer to help train a temp (if there will be one) and make sure to underscore how a temporary person can temporarily do temporary things to help the team until you get back. If your duties will just get reassigned to others on the team, talk about how you'll get them all ready to cover your workload and how you'll catch up with where they are when you return.
  
  Good luck!

   

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• litzo27 member

  October 2014

  
  

  K3am said:

  I think the best thing for you to do is reinforce that you're coming back. For me, it was meeting with my team while I was on maternity leave, and eventually bringing DD into the office (which I hated doing).. 

  This. I would just reinforce that you really appreciate the generous maternity leave but are definitely coming back. Also you can specify how you can be reached for any questions - email, phone, certain hours (for example you can promise to check your email every day around noon and call back to answer any questions in the afternoon). You don't have to do that and some people want to have a completely disconnected maternity leave but personally I like this route.
  

  
   

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• xc1148 member

  October 2014

  thanks ladies!
  
  litzo27 it's not a bad idea, but I'm definitely not planning on working/checking in during maternity leave. They can't really replace me, by the time someone gets up to speed I'll be back anyway, I think my boss will just be chipping in more on some deals here and there. We hired two junior guys this summer so they will be doing more as well.
  

  TTC since June 2011

  DH: perfect SA

  Me: 30, moderate endo, unexplained infertility

  IUI or IVF in December

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

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• jlaOK member

  October 2014

  Agree with all the PP's responses.
  
  In my experience your boss will more likely be counting the days until you come back and not looking to replace you.
  
  Also, you need to keep in mind that they are not doing you a favor by giving you maternity leave.  It sounds like they offer a great maternity leave but you don't owe them anything by using it - much like you don't owe them anything for offering PTO, medical benefits, retirement, etc.
  

  

                                                

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• MommyAtty member

  October 2014

  I'm in the minority, but I do think it's acceptable to ask that they not make personnel changes to your team without getting in touch with you while you're gone. Not the part about being replaced but adding new team members while you're gone. That's a real concern in my organization as we move people around a lot for development purposes. And your hubby is right about reiterating you're coming back. It's sad that it's necessary, but I practically had to get a tattoo that read, "NOT GOING TO BE A STAY AT HOME MOMMY EVER." There are always rampant rumors that every preggo woman is bailing.

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• DiveFrog member

  October 2014

  I will admit that I am totally jaded by my experience, but next time around I will be VERY clear about my expectations about my job when I return and that any changes or adjustment constitute a very valid reason to communicate with me while I am on leave. 

  
  

  Long story short I made it crystal clear to my boss that I was coming back. My boss and I laid out a transition plan, and I executed it. We laid out a re-entry plan before I left as well. I socially met with our entire team (including my boss) twice while on leave. I still ended up being blindsided and my position being given to someone else, and assigned a new role/new position when I returned. This all happened with not a single communication to me. The only reason I found out at all was I was reading emails and saw a newly released organizational chart that didn't even include me on it, and then I initiated contact with my Boss.

  
  

  Needless to say I have huge anxiety about how any future ML will be handled. I tried to really drive home to my boss and his management how horribly they handled the situation so that something like this doesn't happen in the future, but we are currently ttc #2 and what will happen to my position  and what position I will return to is probably my #1 concern about having #2 at this point. 

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• xc1148 member

  October 2014

  Thanks for the responses everyone. I actually barely even mentioned if because ahead of me and my boss getting coffee, I heard he was in NYC for meetings and had told someone me he was freaking out I wasn't coming back. So when we got coffee and I told him my dates, we chatted, I was honest and told him I was nervous, then later he brought up me being promoted (we' d find out in December) and stuff for next year so I felt a ton better. Still going to emphasize how hard I work and that I'm coming back, but it was a good talk.

  
  

  Plus, the place I work really is one of the best places for working moms/women who want careers so I think I'm in good shape.

  
  

  Hope y'all have great weekends! 

  TTC since June 2011

  DH: perfect SA

  Me: 30, moderate endo, unexplained infertility

  IUI or IVF in December

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

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• NADA-H member

  October 2014

  I was worried I'd get laid off from work after maternity leave because work was so slow and there are 2 other people on the team (both singles) who do the same job that I do and we were all under worked at the time. My boss trusts my abilities though and he had asked me to come on the team to improve the level of the output and I made sure to confirm that I was coming back to work after my 2 months maternity leave, I'm a site engineer and my boss knows I cant stay at home or else I go crazy so that helped. My boss and I go back so your boss and you being close would help a lot

  
  God Bless You my Little One
  Farida, our first child, born on the 19th of July 2014
  
  Farida, at 8 weeks
  
  

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• NADA-H member

  October 2014

  @DiveFrog this really sucks and I'm also amazed you stuck it out! 

  
  God Bless You my Little One
  Farida, our first child, born on the 19th of July 2014
  
  Farida, at 8 weeks
  
  

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• DiveFrog member

  October 2014

  Phwudoc said:

  @DiveFrog‌ wow! How horrible. I would probably quit after something like that. I'm amazed you've stuck it out!

  It was horrible, and made returning to work that much harder. However, I stuck it out because I make almost 2X what my DH does, and financially ti simply wasn't an option to quit. We owned 3 houses at the time and had a car payment, we just couldn't NOT  have me working.

  
  

  More importantly I enjoy my work and have great benefits due to how long I have been with my company. I get 5 weeks vacation, unlimited sick/personal time, 3 weeks worth of paid holiday, and I get 100% paid ML of 8 weeks. DH & I have made a collective decision that I will stay in this position through my next (and last) maternity leave and most likely first year back just due to the benefits. After that all bets are off. Still, I am super anxious about said second leave and how it will be handled, because I don't really want to look for a new position.

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