SAHM after going back to Work?

ADC1979 · October 2014

So, anybody else gone back to work, then consider becoming a SAHM? This is only my 5th day back, but between the trying to pump here and the stress of never knowing if I'll get to leave on time to pick up LO before daycare closes, I'm feeling wrung out and like this isn't right. Like I should be with my sweet baby. Maybe I need more time to try to get into the swing of things? I don't know, this is just feeling impossible and like it's all working against me.

A couple weeks ago, I couldn't wait to go back to work and deal with adults all day. Now it makes me want to scream. I've teared up so many times today just from the sheer stress of trying to make this working mom thing work. I feel like I'd have more luck moving a mountain. I understand now why so many women decide to be a SAHM. My heart's being torn in half on a daily basis.

ADC1979 · October 2014

tundrabunny said:

I do keep looking for that perfect part-time job though - you know the one - the one where I get to keep my benefits, make just as much hourly as I do now and pick my schedule so I can optimize my time with LO. )

:-? The sad thing is, that's exactly what my manager does and won't let me do...she rolls in here at 8am and leaves by 5 or before. Every day. If I could pick my schedule this job would still work great!

My DH thinks I could probably get a part time job that pays similar to my FT job. Good to know my master's degree is earning me so much scratch! (Why I always seem to pick the sucky careers, I don't know.)

marsalisails · October 2014

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shortstack930 · October 2014

I haven't even gone back yet but I already know that I would SAH in a heartbeat if it were an option. I hold the benefits though, so I need to stay full time. We are moving in a few months though and are hoping I can SAH or work part time once that happens.

Do what feels right. I would give it a little bit more time but if you feel that you would be better off at home and you and your family can swing it financially then I say go for it. Good luck!

SuperTinkerham · October 2014

I have no urge to SAH but damn if I also want to out in my 37.5 hours week and be done. Instead I'm putting in 45 ish a week. Too much shot to get done.

honeybee434 · October 2014

I never wanted to SAH, but I find it really hard to not get much time with DD during the week. I get about 3 1/2 - 4 hours with her during the evenings on weekdays and also have to use that time for anything else that needs to get done (eating, laundry, etc). It's not an option for me to not work right now, but in my ideal world I would work part time, or even just 4 days a week instead of 5.

I will say the first week back was actually the easiest for me. 2nd week was a little bad and this 3rd week is the worst. I think it's just settling in that this is my new normal and it's hard.

ADC1979 · October 2014

Thanks for all the posts so far, guys. It's really helping me. I went home and ugly cried for a few hours last night (not even baby smiles could cheer me up). DH is all for us finding other options, though he told me not to worry so much about picking DS up in time. (I tried to explain that now I feel hard wired that I must swoop in to pick him up ASAP because I have this feral mama bear brain going on but I don't think he quite gets it.)

I'm going to give this job some time and see if I ever get my groove back, but also going to look to see what else is out there. The contract jobs are a good idea. I think I would probably go a little crazy adjusting to be a full SAHM, but that wouldn't be far off from how I feel now!

alyss0nl · October 2014

I'm sorry you are feeling torn in such a hard decision. Since I'm a teacher, I SAH in the summers, which is just enough for me. Having done this for a couple summers, it's all I need. I also hold benefits, so I'm definitely staying put at a job I've worked so hard for. I can't even imagine trying to pump while at work, my schedule would make it so difficult if I were doing it.

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