I'll start...
One night when I was around 22, I was out with friends at a local dive bar. At the end of the night this 50-something year old guy comes up to mind and stammers out, "I, uh...couldn't help but notice...there's, uh...no....uh, visible means of support." And then he looked down at my chest, which was indeed bra-less. I just stared at him in horror and walked away. There were no words.
Re: s/o relationship horror stories: pickup line nightmares
WTAF? And I MARRIED him. I actually laughed in his face. He definitely broke the ice and had nowhere to go but up at that point.
"Do you work for Nasa?" From a much older man at a casino. Thinking he overheard me saying something that sounded intelligent, I felt flattered. I turned and asked him why, and he flatly said
"because your body is out of this world."
Nicely played, old man.