NBR - request from boss WWYD

mangomimosa · October 2014

I need some help thinking about this one -- sorry so long

I have Tuesdays off. On M/W/F, I have a 3-hr round trip commute to the clinic. M/W end up being 11+ hr days; F is 9+ hr. On Thurs, I work in a clinic in town for 6 hr.

Being in the car for nine hours a week is exhausting. I have back & hip pain from it, and was in PT all summer for my hip. The thing that makes it do-able is having a non-driving day in between each commute.

My boss just asked if I would go to an out of town training session on a Tuesday. It's a 3-hr round trip as well. There is also a session on Wednesday, but she wants me to be able to go to my clinic Weds and see patients like normal. This means that on that week, I would be in the car for 12 hours, and have three 11-hr shifts involving long commutes in a row.

Also, that Tuesday I have a midwife appointment, and an appointment with my counselor. And I was excited to vote on Election Day.

She said I could have Thurs off, but this just means I'll be working an extra Thurs in Dec after I thought I would be done (I have a specific # of hours I HAVE to complete at that clinic.)

I REALLY don't want to move all my appts, suffer the pain & exhaustion of 3 commutes / 11-hr work days in a row, and get stuck at the Thurs clinic until late Dec, just so I can see a handful of patients that Weds.
I would much prefer to attend the Weds training session instead & have someone cover my clinic for me or just schedule patients on M/F.

BUT - it's not like I can't do it. I can inconvenience myself & deal with the pain. Lots of people work longer hours in more difficult situations & it's one week. But I signed up for this job with a specific schedule for a reason.

Would I be justified to say no & stand up for what's best for me? Or am I being selfish? WWYD? Work/life balance is not my forte & I'm not sure where the boundaries are.

ruemorgan · October 2014

I think its justified to say no, you know best what is good for your body or not. Can you provide your boss with a doctors note?

stine28 · October 2014

Have you already told your boss about the appointments? And would you have to make up the hours later if you took Wednesday off for the training?

Skrittens · October 2014

I would say no. Your body and your pregnancy takes priority over everything.

At my job - there is almost never an excuse to say no. Generally dr appointments, illness, family commitments, sick pets, household emergencies - work commitments and especially emergencies come first (not my choice but the way the culture is). BUT - anything having to do with one's own pregnancy takes priority.

So- if you will feel physically uncomfortable and it adds stress - say NO!

jap618 · October 2014

lorindriel said: I would talk to your boss. There's a lot of circumstantial stuff that makes that Tuesday bad for you, not just the commute time. You have a life outside of work and I would let your boss know what's up. If they still really want you to go Tuesday then you might need to see if rearranging your Tuesday appointments is possible.
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This. Honestly I have almost no work/life balance so I'd probably go on the Tuesday if I didn't already have other appointments. I think you are completely justified in saying "I'm so sorry, since I don't usually work on Tuesday's I schedule all of my appointments for that day. I already have multiple commitments for that day. If it's possible I'd really like to attend the Wednesday training and make up my time another week."

Good luck!

Unknown · October 2014

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mangomimosa · October 2014

Thanks for the advice everyone! Really helps to hear what others would do. My H was like "I dunno that's tough..."

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