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Repost: My Son thinks I'm going to die...books to read

jallen76jallen76 member
in Stay at Home Moms
So, I have found one downfall of SAHM...my son has developed a serious anxiety about leaving me to go to school.  He is in Kindergarten this year.  At the start of the school year he had serious anxiety about leaving me and would cry/fight.  He would cry in school too.  With help from his teacher, rewards, and some serious encouragement, he is no longer crying in school.  BUT...he still fights and has anxiety in the morning.  I asked him what is going on in his head, why he is so anxious about school.  He says: "I'm afraid you are going to die Mom, and that I won't be there when you die!"  I have no idea where this is coming from. If it is rainy or stormy out...it makes it worse..."I'm afraid you are going to die today he will say!"  I have reassured him that I will most likely not die and that he is perfectly safe going to school and that I am safe at home.  Not sure what he has seen, but obviously what I am saying to him is not helping.  I wonder if there is a book out there or something that I can say to him that will help him with this anxiety. This is such a tough thing to deal with every day!  Any help or ideas???
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Re: Repost: My Son thinks I'm going to die...books to read

  • notreallyirishnotreallyirish member
    Mama2B2011 said:

    I would consult your pediatrician. This sounds like something that will require more than a book to remedy.

    I second this. Some type of therapy might be in order.

    I have a little advice since I was an anxious child (and am an anxious adult). At that age I freaked out about things like fires and "bad guys" breaking in. My mom pointed out all the adults I knew who were much older than me and had never experienced these things and were alive, safe and healthy. It helped make it more concrete how rare and unlikely they were.
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  • AndrewsgalAndrewsgal member
    You need to get your son some therapy. His anxiety is interfering with everyday life and this is NOT typical. Please take this seriously a book will not fix this.
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  • lexusolsenlexusolsen member
    Another vote for therapy.
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  • jallen76jallen76 member

    CurlingRocks!  I'm so sorry that I didn't see this message until now.  I replied to you just now! 

    For the rest.  I'm not sure that it is at the point of therapy, but thanks for putting that idea in my head. 

    Sing4mysavior...It sounds similar to your story.  He had a dream that I died and now it just affects him so much. I reassure, I pray.  Thanks for the support!

    Anyone can be cool, but awesome takes practice!
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  • lexusolsenlexusolsen member
    jallen76 said:

    CurlingRocks!  I'm so sorry that I didn't see this message until now.  I replied to you just now! 

    For the rest.  I'm not sure that it is at the point of therapy, but thanks for putting that idea in my head. 

    Sing4mysavior...It sounds similar to your story.  He had a dream that I died and now it just affects him so much. I reassure, I pray.  Thanks for the support!

    Why not call your pedi and let them decide? What could that hurt?
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  • notkateanymorenotkateanymore member
    I'm not sure there is a picture book called "Mom's not going to die, we promise" so why don't you let your doctor decide what to do next? Why are you afraid of therapy?
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  • AndrewsgalAndrewsgal member
    edited October 2014
    jallen76 said:

    CurlingRocks!  I'm so sorry that I didn't see this message until now.  I replied to you just now! 

    For the rest.  I'm not sure that it is at the point of therapy, but thanks for putting that idea in my head. 

    Sing4mysavior...It sounds similar to your story.  He had a dream that I died and now it just affects him so much. I reassure, I pray.  Thanks for the support!


    Um DD had a dream I died last year she told me about to one morning. I reassured her I was not going to die she was fine. I have sent two kids to kinder as a SAHM and never experienced the level of anxiety you described. You are failing your son by looking for a book. You need a medical professional. This combined with your kinder post shows huge levels of anxiety that are in no way typical at all.
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  • outnumberedoutnumbered member
    At the very least you need to contact the school psychologist.  My oldest had some anxiety about school.  She saw the psychologist once a week in a group setting.  All the kids were her age and had anxiety during the school day.  That being said her worries were no where near the level of what your child is experiencing.

    If he was hurt physically you would not be asking us for a book title, you would be going to the doctor.  Please do not view his anxiety any differently.  He needs professional help.
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  • HopingforChangeHopingforChange member
    Lurker here. I had this fear as a child and was super clingy. My mom tried to help but never took me to therapy. I then got the same fear about DH and lived with that for years before finally getting the therapy I had needed for most of my life. Sounds to me like you would be doing your son a tremendous favor by taking him to talk to someone. It cannot hurt but might really help.
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