Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Hollowvic
member
Re: Opinions Needed. Do you plan for your future baby?
And yay for November IVF! I'm hoping to be doing IVF in November too!
As for buying stuff. Heck no. That's totally jinxing it. I have donated stuff in my garage, that's bad enough.
PCOS | Anovulatory | Metformin + Letrozole
Me: 28 MH:35
Married September 2012. TTC since September 2013
June 2014 - Dx w/ significant PCOS and referred to RE.
July/August 2014 - Testing complete: Testosterone & AMH very high, FSH slightly high, Vitamin D low, tubes and lining all lovely. DH SA: A+
Cycle 1 (Nov 2014): 2.5 mg Letrozole/Ovidrel/TI = BFN
Cycle 2 (Dec 2014): 5 mg Letrozole/Ovidrel/TI - BFN
Cycle 3 (Jan 2015): 5mg Letrozole/Ovidrel/TI - BFN
WTF consult scheduled for 1/29
***SIGGY WARNING***
Me (26) & DH (26)
Dog Momma to 2 amazing furbabies
Started dating: May 6, 2005 & Married: August 4, 2012
Diagnosis: PCOS
September 2013 - January 2014: Not trying but not preventing
February 2014: Officially TTC (BBT, OPKs, etc)
February-August 2014: Irregular Cycles, U/S showed Fibroids/Cysts, Provera required to get AF, BFNs
September & October 2014: Testing Months with Reproductive Endocrinologist!
DH's SA: Normal (116.4 million sperm, 97% motility, 36% morphology) - WHO criteria
DH's Repeat SA: Poss. Low Morph. (138 million sperm, 73% motility, 8% morphology) - Kruger criteria
HSG and SIS: Normal (tubes clear)
Medicated Cycle: 5mg Letrozole + Trigger Injection + TI = BFP!!
ESTIMATED DUE DATE: AUGUST 13, 2015
Beta #1: 12/8 - 1,040 Beta #2: 12/10 - 2,902 Beta #3: 12/16 - 19,321
Ultrasound #1: 12/12 (5 weeks 1 day) - Gestational sac and yolk sac present
Ultrasound #2: 12/18 (6 weeks 0 days) - Measuring good, heart rate 99
Ultrasound #3: 12/26 (7 weeks 1 day) - Measuring good, heart rate 150
TTC #1
Me: AMA, DH: MFI
Official DX - MFI due to Hemochromatosis
IVF #1 Nov. 2014 - ER 11/10 (10R 6M 6F) - ET 11/13
3DT of 3 embies - no frosties - CP = BFFN!!!!
****All Welcome****
Seems everyone is different and if it works for you now and makes you happy, go for it. If things don't go well having a Pinterest board might not make you happy, but not having it wont make everything ok either.
@lebradford has it right in my opinion. If it's working for you now, great. Just think about how quickly you can get it out of sight later if you need to.
***** All Welcome *****
***** Siggy Warning *****
TTC since Dec, 2012. Me: 33; DH: 34
- Ultrasound to look at "lay of the land": normal
- Blood work: normal
- OPKs and ultrasound to confirm ovulation: Yes
- SA for DH: Normal (a couple numbers on the low side of normal)
- HSG: Normal
- Doing several cycles of Letrozole, TI and progesterone
- Aug cycle of Letrozole, TI and progesterone came back with a BFP-MC at 7 weeks.
- Benched until Jan
- Starting Letrozole, TI, Progesteron and HCG Trigger in Feb cycle
ALL WELCOME!
TTC since 04/12
Me- 26 PCOS
DH- 28 MFI
10/13 IUI #1 (1 follie)- BFP!
11/13 M/C @9 wk due to tetraploidy, one little boy in heaven
01/14 IUI#2 (1 follie) BFN
02/14 IUI #3 (3 follies) BFN
03/14 IUI #4 (2 follies) BFN
05/14 IVF/ICSI #1 CXL
07/14 IVF/ICSI #1.2 6R, 6M, 5F, 2T, 2 frosties!
Transferred 2-5dt CP
09/14 FET #1 BFP! Beta #1 52 Beta #2 152!
10/20/14- It's TWINS!
1/15- TEAM PURPLE!
Me: 27 DH: 35
TTC #1 Since July 2013
Started RE Testing July 2014
2 HSG tests: Right tube is blocked, possible endo.
TSH elevated, started Synthroid 25 mg daily.
October, 2014: Femara 5 mg + TI ---> 3 follies on blocked tube side ---> BFN
November, 2014: Femara + Ovidrel + IUI#1--2 follies (on the good side), 46 mil. motile sperm=BFN
Nov-Dec 2014: Femara + Ovidrel + IUI #2 (1 follie, 76 mil. motile sperm) + Endometrin=BFN
January, 2014: Femara + Ovidrel + IUI #3 (1 follie, 38 mil. motile sperm)=???
New RE appt. scheduled for 1/14.
3T January Siggy Challenge: New Years Resolutions
Mine: Lose the weight I put on from booze and cookies over Christmas.
I'm of the belief that you do what makes you happy and feel good. Especially during a time like this. If you want to make a pintrest board - go for it! If it ever becomes too hard to look at, delete it. But one thing that has been the hardest for me and my spouse, is watching literally everyone else we know participating in all that fun baby stuff. So, if I stumble upon the worlds most adorable gender neutral pajamas with racoons riding a scooter on them (yes, a racoon riding a scooter), I'm going to buy them, because I want to. Is it crazy? You bet! But it makes me laugh to think about where that little raccoon could possibly be going.
I hope this helps you. Now you can say, "Even if I do create a Pintrest board, I won't be as crazy as that one girl who replied to my post!"
TTC since May 2012
HSG- all clear
March 2014 - RE appt.
April 2014- Saline sono all's good, terrible SA results - 8 sperm found all abnormal
May 2014- Fert Urology- Bilateral varicoceles, recommend Donor Sperm
12/2014- Surprise natural BFP EDD 7/31/15 Plan: Starting foster to adoption, natural cycles
The bolded part is so true! I'm usually very good at reframing bad/sad situations into something more positive, but it is difficult to do with IF. Must find the mental and emotional energy to reframe the moments of impatience and frustration to positivity. Perhaps: going through IF will make me more appreciative of the eventual pregnancy and baby (I talk to so many people daily who do not appreciate having a child, and actually threaten to "take them out of this world"). Also, I know for sure that going through IF has made me much more empathetic toward others and more likely to second guess my assumptions, which will help me in my career as a therapist.
Me: 28 MH:35
Married September 2012. TTC since September 2013
June 2014 - Dx w/ significant PCOS and referred to RE.
July/August 2014 - Testing complete: Testosterone & AMH very high, FSH slightly high, Vitamin D low, tubes and lining all lovely. DH SA: A+
Cycle 1 (Nov 2014): 2.5 mg Letrozole/Ovidrel/TI = BFN
Cycle 2 (Dec 2014): 5 mg Letrozole/Ovidrel/TI - BFN
Cycle 3 (Jan 2015): 5mg Letrozole/Ovidrel/TI - BFN
WTF consult scheduled for 1/29
TTC #1
Me: AMA, DH: MFI
Official DX - MFI due to Hemochromatosis
IVF #1 Nov. 2014 - ER 11/10 (10R 6M 6F) - ET 11/13
3DT of 3 embies - no frosties - CP = BFFN!!!!
****All Welcome****
***Signature/Ticker Warning***
March 2008 - DD born - no issues conceiving (surprise). Limited issues during pregnancy/delivery.
June 2011 - Married DH.
June 2013 - Diagnosis of Endometriosis and PCOS (approximate).
December 2013 - First cycle of Clomid - Positive OPK. BFN
January 2014 - 2nd Cycle of Clomid - Positive OPK. BFN
February 2014 - 3rd Cycle of Clomid - Positive OPK. BFN
March 2014 - Took month off to prep for surgery
April 2014 - Laporoscopy for endo. Unable to remove endo due to too close of proximity to ureter. HSG done as well. Fillopian tubes open.
May 2014 - 1st round of Femara. Positive OPK. BFN.
June 2014 - 2nd round of Femara. Moved to RE to have CD10 Follicular U/S. No Follies in left ovary. 5 follies in right. Largest follie 8mm, 1 7mm, 2 3mm, 1 2mm. Positive OPK on day of U/S. BFN. DH has SA done at this time - All results within normal limits.
July 2014 - 3rd round of Femara. CD10 Follicular U/S. No follies in left ovary. 7 follies in right. 1 20mm, 1 12mm, 1 10mm, 4 <5mm. Scheduled for IUI. Canceled due to low estrogen level of 145. TI this month. Prepping for Injectables next month. BFN.
August 2014 - CD3 BW Normal. Injectables not happening because of stupid miscommunication about "required injectables class." Taking class this month. No medication. TI for the month. SIS scheduled for 8/7/14. SIS results - "I have a beautiful uterus." Huzzah!
September 2014 - Cycle cancelled due to stupid AF coming early and making my IUI run in to DH's business trip. Try again next month.
October 2014 - Injects with IUI cycle. 75U 5 days. Estrogen at 36. Bumped up to 125 for 4 days. Estrogen 105. Bumped up to 225. Ganirelix for 2 days. 4 mature follies. Triggered 10/9. IUI 10/10.
BFP 10/24/2014. Beta #1 - 178 Beta #2 - 398. U/S 11/7/14- TWINS!!!!
09/28/2015- Surprise! Conrad and Hudson born at 35w6d!
DH: 29, Perfectly Normal SA
Married Since 10/6/2012
TTC Since 6/2013
2/2014: Visited OB-GYN, Low Progesterone
3/2014: 50 mg Clomid, Ovulated, BFN
4/2014: 50 mg Clomid, Ovulated, BFN
5/2014: 50 mg Clomid, Ovulated, BFN
6/2014: 50 mg Clomid, Ovulated, BFN
7/2014: First RE visit, Diagnosed with PCOS, Started on 5 mg Femara + Ovidrel + TI, 1 22mm Follicle, BFN
8/2014: 5 mg Femara + Ovidrel + TI, 2 Mature Follicles, BFN
9/2014: 5 mg Femara + Ovidrel + IUI #1, 3 Mature Follicles, BFN
10/2014: 5 mg Femara + Ovidrel + IUI #2, 1 Mature Follicle, BFN
11/2014: 5 mg Femara + 75 mg Follistim + Ovidrel + IUI #3, 3 Mature Follicles, BFN
12/2014: Starting IVF in January
1/2015: IVF with ICSI, Currently Stimming
*****Everyone is Welcome*****
However, when I'm feeling optimistic, I knit something for my future baby. I have made three sweaters, one onesie and a diaper cover over the last year and a half. I like seeing them there and picturing my child wearing them. Like NariaDreaming said, "if I knit it, they will come". I have also started cleaning out the spare room which will be the baby's room but won't buy anything for it until I am in my second trimester.
Married and started TTC in July 2013
"Diagnosed" with unexplained infertility
Oct 2014 IUI #1: 100mg clomid/HCG trigger/2 mature follicles/18mil post wash sperm count: BFP!!!
TTC #1
Me: AMA, DH: MFI
Official DX - MFI due to Hemochromatosis
IVF #1 Nov. 2014 - ER 11/10 (10R 6M 6F) - ET 11/13
3DT of 3 embies - no frosties - CP = BFFN!!!!
****All Welcome****