Update Private preschool and school district preschool? wwyd

Hiccup15 · September 2014

Update: Today was DS1's last day of the evaluation and they said that he does qualify to go the rest of the year, starting Monday with an at risk diagnoses. The team decided that they want to get to know him a little better and will discuss an IEP at our meeting at the end of Oct, but the at risk diagnoses lets him join their program immediately. I'm a little surprised because we were originally told that we wouldn't find out any information until our meeting. I think we will try keeping the private preschool in the mix for at least a month to see how he is doing and if going to both are what is best for him.

DS1 is halfway through a four day evaluation with the school district. So far they have said he is doing well with some accommodations. We went in thinking he would probably not qualify for the preschool program and would most likely qualify for just speech. I know we will not know anything until his IEP meeting.

We have him enrolled in a private preschool. He has had a rough few weeks, but things are turning around a little and his teacher said this week has been going well. DH and I figured if he qualified for the school district preschool we would just pull him from the private preschool. However, I was speaking to his preschool teacher and she said she has had a few kids that did both. If he qualified it would be a p.m. class and his private preschool is a.m. I didn't really think much of it but the social worker at the school district brought it up as well. Saying it is good that he is currently in a.m preschool because he could stay in it if we wanted to.

I know this is putting the cart before the horse, but I want us to have a decision made so once we find out if he qualifies or not we could try to get a partial refund from his private preschool since the date to get a refund is approaching fast. So in this situation wwyd? If he qualifies, what would be the benefits of him going to both at the same time? The social worker just said that the parents who choose to do both do it because private preschool is a priority to them.

I feel it will be a long day (kindergarten is only half day here) and we would have to change a few things (therapies, etc..) to make it work. It would also be a little difficult on the days I work and we have a sitter since now they would be running him to two preschools plus his and DS2's therapies. He also goes to a language preschool on Saturdays, so I don't know how he would handle going to potentially three different preschools a week plus private therapy. On the other hand, if this is something that would benefit him we would make it work.

lite-bright · September 2014

For me, it would depend on how complicated things would get with getting him to/from, whether you have private therapy/speech priorities that would take precedence over the private preschool, and the extent to which you think the time in the private school environment is beneficial to him (and whether it's more or less beneficial than other things you could be doing in that time).

IME, I have never regretted putting my DD1 in for more hours of time at school -- with the caveat that 1) she has ASD, and if speech is your only concern, the higher level of school time might not be the right route for your son; and 2) the school was an environment with proper supports. We went straight to four days a week of part-time preschool at age 3, and full-day kindergarten at 5 and I firmly believe that it's part of the reason she has done so well thus far.

But I wouldn't put her in a program just to get her hours in school, either. I learned the hard way that putting her into a situation without the right kind of leaders/teachers was kind of a disaster and hugely stressful for all concerned. It has to be the right kind of situation where it builds on what you're doing in therapies and doesn't undermine progress by exposing your kid to teachers who don't know how to deal with him, or putting him in a situation where he might start feeling negatively about school in general.

ETA: You also have to consider your family life. Three schools, including one on weekends, is a LOT. It sounds like you're doing plenty, and I wouldn't keep the private preschool just to keep it.

Hiccup15 · September 2014

-auntie- said:

If I recall correctly, you're likely to get an educational dx of ASD, no? Yes, ASD is on our radar.

IME, talking with hundreds of parents of older kids on spectrum, it's rare to hear one say "I did too much therapy with my kid when he was younger". The few I know who do express this generally do in the context of wasting time and money on sensory diets or listening programs that could have been used on behavioral approaches and Social Thinking.

That is good to know.

If so, you need more information on the nature of the public program.

If it's an integrated setting where all the kids have qualified under an IEP, he may not have access to peer models. This isn't a huge deal in a younger kid who is still learning the social ropes.

If it's an inclusion setting with peer models, this is less of a concern. Though, TBH, the NT kids in such classes tend to seek one another out rather than those kids who are socially impaired or have challenging behaviors.

The first two days they put him in a very small 2-3 kid classroom where all kids had an IEP. He did very well, the social worker said that he knew the skills they were working on in that class which were turn taking etc..

Then they moved him to what she described as a "mixed" classroom, which had NT kids in the class as well. It was also a much larger group of kids. This is where the teacher mentioned he was doing well with accommodations.

If he gets a good IEP, it might be appropaite to drop overlapping therapies. School can be preferable for certain therapies because the skills can be practiced in the natural setting of the classroom or playground.

What is the Saturday language class? Is it a cultural or religious education class like Hebrew school or Chinese Cultural School? How is he doing there? is he behaving reasonably well? Mastering the lessons?

DH is from Europe so this school teaches in DH's native language. They also teach cultural aspects as well. They will learn how to read and write etc..in the language. The boys are both bilingual, however, DS1 does have the same issues at this school as he does with preschool. So far his teachers have been able to work with him.

finsup · September 2014

My kiddo always did (does) both - public school program, plus a "typical" afterschool/supplemental program.

When he was in preschool the bus would pick him up at our home and he'd do the public preschool program from 8:30 - 1pm, then the bus would drop him at a private preschool who had school aged kids there as an afterschool program as well. He's spend the afternoon there doing their activities and I picked him up around 4:30.

Now that he is in first - he goes to public school then takes the bus to a sports based after school program where I pick him up at 5ish. He often asks to stay later because he has so much fun.

I've been lucky in that there are a lot of options in my area for programs that are welcoming to kids with developmental differences, and it works for us. The more I can get him out with peers, with caring adults to supervise and help, the better.

RedJen07 · September 2014

My DS is currently attending both a public inclusive preschool (he is in the process of getting an IEP) and a private pre-k (in our daycare but they do have an academic curriculum). We are doing it out of necessity with work schedules, but so far he has been enjoying it. He will be getting speech & language at school and probably OT too, plus he gets both therapies privately as well. I've been taking one afternoon (Mondays for now) off of work and off of his afternoon private pre-k to take him to his additional therapy sessions. Our public pre-k has been really great for him so far and we have already seen huge strides in behavior and pre-academic skills. The teachers there have the experience and skills to push him and get him to engage more.

We also will have bussing as soon as his IEP is in place to take him from the public pre-k to the private one. I think that is definitely a factor since right now it is tough driving him everywhere he needs to be.

Good luck with your decision!

Hiccup15 · September 2014

RedJen07 said:

My DS is currently attending both a public inclusive preschool (he is in the process of getting an IEP) and a private pre-k (in our daycare but they do have an academic curriculum). We are doing it out of necessity with work schedules, but so far he has been enjoying it. He will be getting speech & language at school and probably OT too, plus he gets both therapies privately as well. I've been taking one afternoon (Mondays for now) off of work and off of his afternoon private pre-k to take him to his additional therapy sessions. Our public pre-k has been really great for him so far and we have already seen huge strides in behavior and pre-academic skills. The teachers there have the experience and skills to push him and get him to engage more.

We also will have bussing as soon as his IEP is in place to take him from the public pre-k to the private one. I think that is definitely a factor since right now it is tough driving him everywhere he needs to be.

Good luck with your decision!

I think if we are able to get bussing that would make it much easier. The public preschool is not at the elementary school that we are districted to and is a 30 minute drive.

Hiccup15 · September 2014

-auntie- said:

Transportation is part of the IEP. Ask about it as you write the document.

I know a couple of kids who were raised bilingually. A few of them needed to learn a different alphabet at language school so they could learn to read- Hebrew, Mandarin, Greek, Russian. The ones who were brought up speaking German, Spanish, Italian and Yiddish did not need a formal reading program- they just sort of caught on as they learned to read English.

Transportation would be a huge help. It uses the same alphabet with a few additional letters. We have a large population of Eastern Europeans here and unfortunately most of the bilingual kids who both parents are fluent switch to only English in grade school. By high school they can barely understand and will only respond in English. I don't speak much of it so we are trying to do everything possible to help the boys. This is very important to DH because his whole family lives in Europe and only one cousin speaks a little English. For the boys to have any relationship with his family, they really need to know it.

What I find interesting is that other populations around us do not seem to have as much of an issue with kids losing their second language in grade school. We have a condo in an area with a large Hispanic population and the children prefer to speak Spanish to each other, where as what we are finding now that we moved one city away to an area with a large Eastern European population, the children prefer to speak English to each other.

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