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Pre baby jitters? or something more severe?

Krystalsherrard88Krystalsherrard88 member
in 3rd Trimester
So let me start by saying that I am a first time mom and I am truly blessed to be pregnant after several miscarriages in my past. I am in my third trimester at 32 weeks and I am already so in love with my kiddo even though he isn't here quite yet. My question though, is that lately I have been feeling really anxious about what life is going to be like after he is born. Don't get me wrong I am soooo excited, but is it normal for me to be freaking out a little tiny bit about losing my independance. Sometimes I find myself near tears at the thought that I can no longer do the things I have the freedom to do right now, like going to the store without a big production, or going out on a date with the Hubby whenever I feel like it, or even just going to take a shower whenever I want, or nap whenever I want. I have struggled with depression in the past and I am a bit concerned that this anxious feeling could be a sign of a deeper rooted issue. I feel like a horrible and selfish person because I find myself so terrified of losing myself and who I want to be that it makes me super upset about the fact that this baby is coming. BUT after calming down I realize how completely blessed and happy I am and how much I love the little guy. Is it normal to be freaking out this much about losing my "pre mom independance?"
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Re: Pre baby jitters? or something more severe?

  • munchiemama104munchiemama104 member
    yes, it is normal but you will forget it once the baby comes. I felt the same way about DD before she was born, b ut then I found myself not wanting to be away from her. It became normal for her to be around. I still found time to shower and I loved bringing her to the store when she was old enough (now is a different story because she is almost 4) you'll be just fine!
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  • ashiscuteashiscute member
    Totally normal.  Your life is about to change and you have no idea what it will be like.  How could that not make you feel nervous?  If you feel like you are really struggling then talk to someone about it.  But I think every mom goes through this.  Even for second, third pregnancies.  
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  • PrimRoseMamaPrimRoseMama member
    Normal.


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  • KateLouiseKateLouise member
    Normal, and yes you will fall in love with your baby more than you will think possible.

    Having said that, seeing as you have experienced depression in the past, it's good to be aware of these feelings as you move forward. A new baby can be overwhelming. Your hormones can do a number on you, and obviously sleep goes out the window for a while. So if, once baby arrives, you feel like you're struggling then speak up!

    Some babies are really cruisy and some babies are poor sleepers/grizzly/have reflux/will only sleep in your arms/sickly etc etc etc Everyone's experience is different and there is no right or wrong way to feel. Just make sure you get the support and help you need, whether it's some downtime to yourself, extra help cleaning, medication if that's best for your situation or whatever works for you.

    Babies are a real joy, but they're even more of a joy when you have all the right supports in place for yourself.

    Best wishes for your new arrival, enjoy this exciting time!!
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  • 2goingon32goingon3 member
    Agree, most people go through this to some extent. You'll be able to do a modified version of everything you used to do alone, and as for dates, you and your DH will make it work....restaurant take out is just as good as eating out and the wine's cheaper at home :P
    It's good that you recognize these feelings and it's best to start coming up with some ways to cope now, so they're less severe when you're in a stupor due to lack of sleep.

    Just remember, a baby adds to the richness of life, you don't just lose out!
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  • marajay6marajay6 member

    Agree with previous posters - it is normal to be nervous about becoming a parent.

    You say that you have a bit of a history with depression. Because of that, I encourage you to start talking to your doctor now about possible PPD.  PPD can be very serious and you will want to make sure you can get the care you need if you happen to have it. 



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  • SteffieR13SteffieR13 member
    What you are feeling is totally normal.  I think it is good that you are recognizing that there will be changes, and having little freak out moments when you realize a trip to Target isn't going to be as easy as it used to be is totally acceptable.  I am like you, and have depression and am being hyper aware of any PPD that may arise (LO is almost 3 weeks old). I was almost expecting to have PPD almost immediately due to my history in combination with a feeling of losing my independence and life changing overall, but I have felt happier than ever.  Still not in the clear, but I was surprised at how I feel--and you may end up feeling the same way once your LO is here.

    Just be aware of how you feel once LO is here. Make sure your own doctor and LO's pediatrician are aware of your depression history, so they can help keep tabs on how you are feeling/coping. 
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