3rd Trimester

mean doc?

I am not sure if I am just sensitive, but my doc seems like he has no patience. I don't call him with silly questions or even ask very much. When I do though he gets short with me and seems annoyed. He has been doing it for 30 years and is always busy so I am assuming he is good at what he does. ... I just don't feel comfortable while talking to him. Should this matter? Has anyone else dealt with this? Do You feel comfortable with your ob? Thanks :)

Re: mean doc?

  • I used a combo-midwife-OB.

    Honestly? You see your OB less than your nurses during delivery. As long as he answers your questions effectively I would just classify all his attitude as "abrupt, but focused on his job."

    If your OB is the one you see for all female issues it might be worth switching to someone who meets your emotional needs better.

    Being to the point is different than dismissive, though.


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  • Likely he has poor bedside manner, but that doesn't mean he isn't good at what he does.

    Sometimes I feel rushed by the OB, but I write down all of the questions to make sure I get my answers. He answers them quickly and effectively. If you think something isn't right, advocate for yourself.

    My OB wanted to give me tdap after birth and stated that they don't do it in the office. At my next appointment I said I do understand you don't do the tdap shot in the office, but since CDC recommends the shot be given during pregnancy, what are my options?

    Long story short, he agreed the practice needed to update the policy. He wrote a script so I could receive the shot from my family doc. Be willing to stand up for yourself, if need be!!

     
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  • Thanks ladies... I appreciate the feed back. I feel like I always pictured my obgyn being some super happy smiling person. I trust my doctor is good I just feel like I needed someone to make me feel comfortable about everything. Good thing for my husband though. I think I may look at getting a midwife or doula for the positivity I think I need. I will get more of a back bone and try not to worry. Primrosamama thank you for giving me that info about the doc. I didn't want him to be hanging out with me while laboring. Lets just hope my nurses are friendly. Thanks for the feesback guys <3
  • With my first son my OB was the same way. Very dry and no bedside manners at all. He made me feel stupid each time I asked a question. But he was an excellent doctor. So after my 6 week check-up I decided to switch. This time around I have an excellent OB and MW. I feel so much better about asking questions and really enjoy having conversations with them at each visit. My suggestion would be try to tough it out and like PP said make sure you advocate for yourself. Once you deliver you can always find a new one. Good Luck!
  • Thank you! Such great advice :)
  • I go to a practice where I rotate between 2 docs and 2 midwives.. I can't stand one of the midwives, I honestly felt like she brushed off a LOT of things that the others in the practice took seriously (case and point, I got DXed with pre-e when I mentioned issues at a next appointment with another Dr in the practice and she ordered testing to be done, the midwife told me my symptoms were normal and par for the course). As long as your doctor is hearing your concerns when you feel they are serious, and answering your questions, stick with them, he probably has horrible bed side manners. I have one like this, and he has become my greatest ally in the practice! (He may be short but I love him and really hope he is the on-call when i deliver.) 

    Like PP's have said, there is a huge difference between a doctor who doesn't hear you and doesn't care, and one who is just short and to the point. You're gonna have to go with your gut on which one of those you think your doctor is.. but NEVER be afraid to seek a second opinion.
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  • I don't love my OB either.  By chance, I happened to see another doctor at the practice during my last visit and will probably switch to her after the baby is born because it's a little late in the game for me to try to change docs at this point.

    Regardless, you should always feel free to ask whatever questions you may have AND expect a response from whatever provider you have.

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  • It's harder to switch doctors the further along you are but if you ever feel uncomfortable or brushed off by your doctor don't hesitate to find a new doctor. It's true you don't see your doctor much during labor but he's the one that will make the decisions. You need to be comfortable enough with him to either trust his opinion/choices for your delivery without hesitation or be assertive enough to stand up for yourself. Don't stay with him only because he's a good doctor. Go with your gut.
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