Speaking of parties...do you open gifts AT the b-day party?

CallMeKel · January 2009

I do....and I kinda think it's rude NOT to....I enjoy picking out & wrapping gifts and also quite enjoy watching the birthday child open their gifts. I kinda think it's appropriate to open them in front of the guests so you (as the receiver) can offer a verbal 'blanket' thank-you...even though I (personally) still send thank-you notes, too. I'm fine with not receving a written thank you IF the receiver has blanket thank-you'd the attendees at the party....but I do think it's a bit rude when I've never even see the child open the gift, and I still don't receive a written acknowledgement for it.

What do you think....or do you even have an opinion on the matter at all?

Just curious....my sister and I were having this debate the other day at my twin nephews' b-day party.

monkaloo · January 2009

No, we don't. At least not at this age.

I tried it a couple years ago at Maren's 2nd birthday and it didn't go over well. They were just too young. After that, I decided to hold off on trying again until age 5 or 6, when kids can better grasp the concept of gifts, and can sit still for the time it takes to open them.

I will caveat that we don't really have much family here, so the kids' parties consist of kids from school and play gym. Therefore the adult/kid ratio is even -- or there are more kids than adults. This makes things hectic. If we had family here and the party was mainly comprised of family members interspersed with a few friends - it's likely we would do gift opening - even at a younger age.

I suppose my choice to forgo gift opening at this age could be construed as rude by some (or most!). It would be unfortunate, because we really do appreciate everyone's presence and the thought they put into their gift - which we express with handwritten thank you notes.

aprilprincess · January 2009

At this age, I'm on the other side. I don't like the part of the party where they open gifts. The kid opening them are distracted by the presents and wants to play with each of them, the other kid guests try to steal them, it takes forever and is usually towards the end with the kids are getting restless already. And when they're little (like 3-4) there's often the gift they open and voice disapointment-which is awkward for everyone.

I take photos of Addie playing with the presents to use them as thank you cards, so the giver can see the enjoyment she gets out of it.

and i do think it's rude to only do the blanket thank you with no note. but I'm old fashioned and not a fan of email thank yous (although somehow evites are prefectly acceptable, it's harder to loose those)

CallMeKel · January 2009

aprilprincess:

At this age, I'm on the other side. I don't like the part of the party where they open gifts. The kid opening them are distracted by the presents and wants to play with each of them, the other kid guests try to steal them, it takes forever and is usually towards the end with the kids are getting restless already. And when they're little (like 3-4) there's often the gift they open and voice disapointment-which is awkward for everyone.

I take photos of Addie playing with the presents to use them as thank you cards, so the giver can see the enjoyment she gets out of it.

and i do think it's rude to only do the blanket thank you with no note. but I'm old fashioned and not a fan of email thank yous (although somehow evites are prefectly acceptable, it's harder to loose those)

What a great idea, AP!

Thanks for both of your responses...it's good food for thought!!!!!!!!!!!!

MrsMGR · January 2009

I ditto aprilprincess 100% and we won't be opening gifts next weekend in front of everyone. Too much chaos and Joe will be distracted by all the people around him and each individual gift to enjoy the opening process. I also think all the kids attending the party would have issues watchin another kid get a truckload of presents. When I attend kid birthday parties, I don't really want to see the gift opening portion. So, we won't be doing it.

rayskit10 · January 2009

aprilprincess:

At this age, I'm on the other side. I don't like the part of the party where they open gifts. The kid opening them are distracted by the presents and wants to play with each of them, the other kid guests try to steal them, it takes forever and is usually towards the end with the kids are getting restless already. And when they're little (like 3-4) there's often the gift they open and voice disapointment-which is awkward for everyone.

-or- there is one gift they really love and have no interest in opening the rest. again, awkward.

I take photos of Addie playing with the presents to use them as thank you cards, so the giver can see the enjoyment she gets out of it.

i loved this idea and would like to try and do the same thing. addie's pic is still on our fridge

and i do think it's rude to only do the blanket thank you with no note. but I'm old fashioned and not a fan of email thank yous (although somehow evites are prefectly acceptable, it's harder to loose those)

agreed

needless to say, we will not be opening gifts at truitt's party either. the last couple 2 year old parties i went to, they did not open the gifts there and no one cared. the kids were too busy going crazy anyway.

funnyvalentine · January 2009

These are interesting points that I've never considered. ?I have never been to a child's party where they didn't open gifts. ?But then again, I haven't been to a child's party in a long time and the ones that I went to were almost exclusively family parties. ?

CallMeKel · January 2009

It's very interesting for me to read these perspectives, as well, as I have been to a lot of b-days parties lately and I've only once seen gifts NOT opened.

M&M614 · January 2009

we have the past 2 years but after Mia's recent 2nd birthday, I think we'll steer clear of it in the future. It's craziness, the other kids are always in the way, and Mia just wants to play with everything anyway. And everyone else gets restless, because seriously? It's kinda boring to watch a 2-year-old open a ton of gifts. I wa seven a bit bored and she's my kid! But that's just me...

Even Mia was ready to just go play already.

nanann · January 2009

I believe in opening gifts at the party. I really dislike not having the gifts opened, esp. b/c I sometimes do handmade items. And at Julia's 1st birthday she got a handmade wooden toy and I would have felt AWFUL if I didn't open it in front of the person that made it!

We've perfected the art of going quickly, and I don't worry about other kids playing and helping opening. It's part of the fun of a birthday party!

kbv · January 2009

My thinking for opening gifts is that it depends on the amount of gifts/ppl. If you have a huge party, I think it would take too long to open up gifts. If its small, then yes, it seems appropriate.

The thank you note issue really bugs me. I agree that its rude if your present isnt opened in front of you and you dont get a thank you note. I still wonder to this day if ppl knew the gift was from me! (I'm talking wedding gifts too which obvioulsy arent opened in front of ppl, so if you dont get a thank you note, how do you know they got it!) I cant imagine not sending thank you notes for DS' bday gifts, but thats just me.

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