I am unsure about all this but wanted to get your thoughts....
My brother and his fiance are having a baby. The other day his fiance's mom called my mom. All she wanted was for my mother to pay half the bill for the baby shower. My mom agreed of course, but when she got off the phone felt a little upset. She is not going to get to see anything her mom is buying, have any opinion on anything, they don't even want her to come early to help set up or decorate.....basically they just want the check. She is feeling left out and understands this is a big time for the mother of mother to be.....but shouldn't my mother get to be involved a tiny bit if she is paying half the bill. She doesn't even need to get to be involved in desicions.....she just wants to feel apart of this (even help decorate).
Re: What do you think about this
If she is paying, then she gets to be involved. All she has to do it very nicely say to MIL that she is so excited about the little one that she wants to help out in any way she can. Then "When would you like to go shopping for decorations?" and "What time are we setting up for the party?" "Let's do the invitiations on Sunday."
Not, "Would you like me to help set up?"
Have you mom call back and say that she "feels bad" that all she is doing is paying for half and wants to help out more - when are they setting up, what can she pick up/make to bring etc.