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ASD parents...do you notice this?

kcisthebombdotcomkcisthebombdotcom member
in Special Needs
So surprise, surprise...DD isn't a very social child. She will join/allow same age peers to join in highly preferred play, likes to watch kids doing physical play like swinging/going down slides, etc, but is otherwise content to play solo. One exception to this is younger kids. If a younger child is interested in something she is doing she seems to love to teach them how to play with something regardless if it's something she is really into or not. Anyone notice this with their children?
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Re: ASD parents...do you notice this?

  • CrocusPocusCrocusPocus member
    We have the opposite problem. DS wants to play with other kids, especially older kids, and tends to get rejected by them for not understanding social rules, games, how to play without being annoying and just copying everything another kid does, etc. It's heartbreaking to watch, and just last night at the park I was wishing he were content to play solo. But I can see where you'd be equally concerned about your daughter wanting to play by herself, so I hope someone else can reply with a similar experience!
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  • hopecountshopecounts member
    I have noticed this with DD she is fine with parallel play if a kid wants to join her and after watching for a few will join in with a group and do what they are doing along side them but she is far more likely to be interactive if it is a slightly younger child (usually around or under her developmental age of 2-2.5) 
    We have good friends whose daughter is almost exactly 2 years younger and they enjoy playdates together, It's definitely one of her more social times. She doesn't do the teaching so much but definitely plays more with younger kids. 
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  • KeeptruckinKeeptruckin member
    Mine loves little ones around 18 months to 2 because they are old enough to somewhat follow her "script" and do what she says lol!
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  • KeeptruckinKeeptruckin member
    edited September 2014
    I wouldn't say she enjoys teaching them things she isn't interested in. If a small child wanted help going down the slide etc, DD wouldn't want to help. Instead she would want them to take part in only what she wants to play, usually some version of her doing a magic show and them being the audience. That's the best word, younger kids can make a good audience lol, and older kids will be more likely to indulge her and then take the play the direction they want. Kids her age don't want to follow her agenda so she kind of avoids them. If that makes sense. It sounds like your daughter has some good empathy skills if she wants to help, even if it's not her preferred activity!
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  • MirandaHobbesMirandaHobbes member

    Ditto above. Lol, I remember when he was 4 and going through his Clay Jam phase and he couldn't stop talking about it. He was "best buds" with 3 year old. I overheard the 3 year old say "tell me more about Clay Jam" and the look on DS's face was priceless- like he had found his soul mate. DS also tries to play with older kids and it doesn't end well.

    Your description of your DD wanting to teach the littles reminds of nurturing little girl behavior, wanting to be Mom to the littles.

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  • macchiattomacchiatto member
    My son who is "at risk for ASD" is like this. He tends to do well with kids about 2 years younger (like the 2y/o girl and 3y/o boy in our neighborhood) or kids several years older.
    fraternal twin boys born january 2009
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  • hopankahopanka member
    DS does best with his teen cousins or the younger siblings of his classmates. So, yes - to us it definitely applies.
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