Do I lie to friends or just go ahead and tell them before my family knows?

kerriam26 · September 2014

Hello! I need some advice! I'm 6 weeks with my first and very excited. My husband and I are planning to tell my family (parents and 4 siblings) when we are all together for a football game in two weeks. It'll be my parents first grandchild and I really want to tell them in person so we can record it. I have one small problem... Before I even tried to conceive, I started training for a half marathon with some friends. That race is next weekend (a week before the football game) and recently I've been super light-headed and faint when I try to run, so I don't think running the race is a good idea at his point. The only thing is, do I lie to my friends and make up an excuse for why I'm not running? Or do I tell my friends the truth? I don't really want to tell non-family members this early or even worse earlier than I tell my own mother but I hate lying to my good friends! Anyone out there experience something similar or have advice? Thanks in advance!!

Mamatolilbee · September 2014

Personally, I want my mom and my in laws to be the first to know so I would probably just figure out a way around telling them the truth.

Ndracer · September 2014

I had similar problem before where I was spotting so doctor took me off all activity and yet I had a half marathon is trained months for. For me it was easiest to lie. I just said I woke up with a migraine and was throwing up. They never second guessed me and I never told them truth.

Now I'm debating what to do this time as I have a half marathon the week I will be 12 weeks pregnant. I've been training all summer and my friends that I'm doing it with know how difficult it was to get in and won't take any excuse but the truth I'm sure. I wouldn't mind telling them at 12 weeks but ideally I'd love to sell my race registration as it cost over $150. So I need to do that soon. My doctor has told me he doesn't want me doing a half due to distance and I'm pregnant with twins. So now I don't know how to sell the registration without friends finding out

LexiSophie55 · September 2014

I lie. I lie everytime I go out. I can't drink at bowling because I have to run into work afterwards. I don't go to happy hour because I have to milk. I don't go to the street dance because it's too cold (in my defense it was 40 degrees). I don't drink at golf because I already went to happy hour with co-workers and had too many. Unfortunately - I lie. They understand in the long run.

careyalis · September 2014

Eh...I don't see the point in lying. You said they were your very close friends? Just tell them "hey, I'm not running because I am pregnant. We haven't even told our families yet, so please don't tell anyone." I'm not big on keeping it a secret from people I'm close to.

Whitneytanke · September 2014

I told my two best friends before I told my parents. Actually, I told my moms group from DS before I even told my DH. I'm a terrible liar, and a HUGE wine-o, so I had to tell my girlfriends.

CoPilot2012 · September 2014

I'd lie. It's friends vs family, I'll pick my family and it's not a lie that would hurt my friends. They've either been there, or will be, so one day they'll understand.

SnowFlake84 · September 2014

I've told my closest friends and neighbors (we're super close with our neighbors), but want to plan a big surprise for the family. They're in other towns so we're safe.

Ndracer · September 2014

@kerriam26‌ I'll probably do that. I actually have one friend who will probably buy it but I would have to explain to her. Doctor is fine with me running just not 13.1 miles

. But I'm ok with that. I've struggled for so long for this that I'll do whatever the doc says

kerriam26 · September 2014

Thanks everyone! I think I'm leaning towards the side of telling them. After all, if something were to happen (*knock on wood*) I'd most likely tell them about it anyway. So why not tell them a lil early? I'm also a terrible liar. And @Ndracer‌ maybe you can sell your registration now but keep going on training runs (assuming your doc says it's okay) to give yourself some time before you have to tell your friends?

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