Bedtime Routine

SWA80 · September 2014

My 12 month old boys share a room and STTN pretty consistently. We sleep trained at 6 months but I have been putting them down one at a time at night- I breastfeed one, put him down, he goes to sleep while I feed the second and then I put the second down. I'm weaning them now and am so worried about the logistics of putting them down at the same time in the same room. For naps, we read a few books and then put them down in separate rooms. They cry for a couple of minutes and then go to sleep but if they are in the same room I think they're just going to feed off each other and escalate. Is the only option to just stick them in their cribs at the same time and let them CIO? Any other suggestions?

raraavis28 · September 2014

What happens if one of them wakes up in the motn and cries? Does he wake his brother? They might be more accustomed to dealing w/ each other than you expect....

If I were you, I'd try just putting them down at the same time and seeing what happens. I know that when my boys were that age they really enjoyed playing with each other before falling asleep.....still, when they go down you hear happy screams and laughing, and they eventually settle down and that playtime is part of their unwinding before bed.

If that isn't working, though, I'd move more gradually and keep the same routine minus the nursing. Maybe you can rock one and lay him down in the dark room while your H reads to or rocks the other? Either way, I'm sure you will find something that works for you.....good luck!

SWA80 · September 2014

Thanks @raraavis28. They ignore each other for the most part MOTN. They definitely have never done any playful laughing with each other in their cribs though. Maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised. My husband wants to separate them but I don't.

TREDgirl · September 2014

Are you going to offer any before bedtime drink like in a sippy cup? If so you can still do your regular routine.

I do the same as you with their bedtime bottles but for us the one down first isn't usually asleep while I feed the 2nd one. I'd keep them in the same room. They'll get used to it.

carrotcake06 · September 2014

We would always tandem nurse before bed but around 14mo they refused/were uninterested. So we switched it up and it went well bc the old way wasn't working anymore.

Now, we do separate baths and then play in their room. We clean up all of their toys and get out a few books and I sit in their room and read books - sometimes one or both will sit on my lap or they'll walk around.

After books, I drop them into their cribs. For the first 2 days they cried for less than a minute and now they just talk to each other for a bit and then fall asleep.

Give it a try and see how it goes.

chickaboo1974 · September 2014

After removing the pre-bedtime bottle, we changed our routine. We then went to pjs/diaper, brush teeth, then crib. When in their crib, I would sit between the two of cribs and read three books to them. The last book was always "Goodnight Moon" so that was the signal it was bedtime.

My boys have always shared a room, and mostly sleep thru the other's crying. Even now at almost 4, one could be sick and puking and the other still is sleeping.

SWA80 · September 2014

Thanks for the suggestions, I am going to give it a shot this weekend and hope for the best.

CaliCarly77 · September 2014

My girls always go to bed at the same time - only one of them really cries, and the other seems disturbed and annoyed by it, but they both fall asleep pretty quickly (we have never done "cry it out" but Josie will make a lot of protesting noises for a good 5 - 10 minutes when we turn off the light, we suspect Alex just deals with it.)

So my question is - you are putting baby 2 down when baby 1 is asleep now - does baby 1 get disturbed or is he/she so deep asleep at this point that its fine? I think the fact that baby 1 has been fine sleeping through the noise of baby 2 getting put down to sleep, then it will continue that way.

SWA80 · September 2014

1 is asleep when I take 2 in. 2 always goes right to sleep if the room is quiet and dark.

Tonight 1 didn't want to go to sleep and whereas I normally would stall until he settled to take 2 in, I went ahead and did it to see what would happen. Both stood and cried for a bit but settled and went to sleep in 15 mins. For a first attempt, I'm calling that a win!

SWA80 · September 2014

Of course I didn't take away the breastfeeding tonight...

ballygirl · September 2014

We sleep trained at 6 months also and they are decent sleepers now. We always put them down together now. We start our bedtime routine about 30 minutes before bed. I have a futon mattress on the floor in their playroom and we have bottles there and I usually start reading while they are feeding. I continue with books and songs until I see them start to get fussy or rolling over and then we take them both up. Sometimes its hard to keep them on the mattress, they want to crawl off and play. When this happens, the tickle monster comes and Talking Sock (ie - a sock that I was going to turn into a sock puppet but never got around to it, so its just a sock that talks) and we play peekaboo and these types of games keep them settled in one place. When they go up they might cry a little - like 5-10 minutes, but they don't usually work each other up. One of them really has to be screaming pretty bad to get the other one worked up - and at that point I would go in anyway to see what is wrong, but if its just low level fussing and crying while they get settled, the other ignores it.

SWA80 · September 2014

Attempted this new routine tonight and it went okay. Easy baby cried for 10 mins or so, difficult baby for 30 so I am feeling pretty optimistic that they'll settle into this new routine. I'm delighted to be finished breastfeeding, but a little sad about it too. I cannot believe how fast they are growing up.

CaliCarly77 · September 2014

ballygirl said:

One of them really has to be screaming pretty bad to get the other one worked up - and at that point I would go in anyway to see what is wrong, but if its just low level fussing and crying while they get settled, the other ignores it.

Yup this is the same in our house. Only a super melt down by baby B will elicit any sort of reaction from baby A.

SWA80 said:

Attempted this new routine tonight and it went okay. Easy baby cried for 10 mins or so, difficult baby for 30 so I am feeling pretty optimistic that they'll settle into this new routine. I'm delighted to be finished breastfeeding, but a little sad about it too. I cannot believe how fast they are growing up.

Wow seems like a great first attempt!! It will be seamless in 2 more nights for sure.

Oh man I was a freaking MESS when I stopped breastfeeding. I wrote a blog about it: https://thecrocketfamilyblog.blogspot.com/2014/04/no-one-tells-you-anything-attempt-ii.html

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