Dade's Birth Story (CapsFan52)

Dade Roderick entered the world on August 6 at 1:02am after 15 hours of labor that included 4 hours of pushing. He was 8lb8oz and 21 1/2 inches.

The birth was actually pretty traumatic to both myself and DH, and I've been waiting to write this til most everyone has an outside baby just in case it would cause anyone any stress to read it.

My blood pressure had been slowly rising for about a week so the decision was made to induce. I did a gel Sunday morning, another gel Monday mornjng, and then went in to start pitocin at 8am Tuesday. Things kicked off around 10am and were going well until I asked for an epidural. About 20 min after it was placed, my bp and DS's heartrate tanked. After 2 doses of ephedrine, we were ok, but, I was one of the "lucky few" who had a window where the epi didn't work. So, while it masked the back labor I was having, I could feel EVERYTHING "down there." I know lots of women choose to go unmedicated, but, I didn't, so it was rough. I always thought I was a wimp - not anymore! In between contractions I still found a way to make jokes (we were trying to think of good birthing songs like Push It, etc) until I was about to push.

I started pushing at 9 PM. Then, the entire epi failed. As in, the machine stopped working and for 1 1/2 hours I was med free. In between these contractions I was silent. Conserving energy. Focused on getting this baby out.

After pushing for 3 hours, it was obvious he wasn't coming out on his own. Dr was performing a c section on another mommy, so I pushed for another hour while waiting for him, hoping I could get this guy out on my own. No luck.

When dr showed up, he gave us our options and went straight to worst case senario. It was beyond terrifying. I don't mean to make my experience seem worse than others...I know there are WAY WORSE birth stories, but to us, this was incredibly traumatic to be faced with this...I've never been so scared in my life. All I heard was I could put myself in danger (c section with high risk of rupture/ hemorrhage because he was so low already) or put him in danger (vacuum assist with risk of neck nerve damage, broken shoulder, shoulder dystocia, head trauma).

Of course, I would've picked putting me in danger, but after watching one more push, Dr made the decision to do a vacuum assist. Before I knew it, he was out. Luckily, his only injuries were 2 cuts to his head, which are healed now.

I had a 3rd degree tear and hemorroids. Definitely not fun.

DS had some latching issues, and combined with my milk not coming in (though I tried pumping every 3 hours for a few days) we had to stop BFing after 1 week. I feel somewhat guilty, but I also know it's the best decision for our family. I couldn't bear to watch him scream from hunger anymore, even when we supplemented...the whole BFing time was just a disaster for us both. He was jaundiced and lost 10% of his birth weight, so we had to make that decision.

In his first two weeks he got conjunctivitis in both eyes, his umbilical cord became infected and he had lots of trouble pooping. One thing after another, but he came out ok.

I also had a pooping issue...no matter what your OB says, do NOT try suppositories! I will spare you the details but in addition to the uncontrollable terribleness, I felt like I was giving birth all over again. Even my husband cried.

All of this sent my already high anxiety sky high and I had a complete mental breakdown, intrusive thoughts taking over every minute. I felt so helpless. It hit me so much harder than I was prepared for. Thankfully, my love for my son (and my amazing husband) is so strong and things are falling in to place. I still have anxiety about things (like SIDS) but, I'm making my way through.

Now LO weighs 10lbs4oz and sleeps like a champ at night. Though I can't imagine doing this again (I've always wanted 3...now I'm thinking were a OAD family) I'm so happy to have the baby I've always dreamed of and DH is amazing. He was so supportive during the birth and is an amazing father. I've fallen in love with him 100x more this past month (though I never knew that was possible).

Here's a smile from my boy!

(Edit cuz I posted in TMOTN and had typos or skipped words.)