My nan pasted away and I never told her

paigery123 · September 2014

My nan pasted away yesterday morning and it was a very unexpected shock as she was not unwell. My nan was like my bestfriend she had live with my family since I was six years old till I was 19 and I am now 20 so I have always hang out with my nan and we were extremely extremely close! I am not coping with her passing very well because I hadn't got to tell her that she was going to be a first time grandma I know she would of been so happy! I just feel like a huge part of me has been riped out and I don't even know how to deal with this.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

jmcgra06 · September 2014

Sorry for your loss

Do you have a pastor or a counselor that you can talk to? I worked at a camp for kids who had lost parents for a summer, and one of the activities that we did was writing a letter to the parent and burning it so it would go up to heaven. I'm not sure what your beliefs are, but it was very therapeutic for a lot of the kids and might be worth a try.

ETA wrong emoticon

kellyfo14 · September 2014

So sorry for your loss.

BookitBoo · September 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. My nana passed away 2 years before my son was born and I always felt so bad she didn't get to see her grandson.

I like the idea of a previous poster, to write a letter and burn it so it gets to her. I often 'talk' to nana even though she isn't here it helps me to feel closer to her.

Praying for peace for your family

paigery123 · September 2014

Thank you all, me and my nan are extremely spirital so I am going to write a letter and have it placed in her coffin, and I may do a letter and burn it as I know she will be here watching me, I just wished I had told her she was going to be a first time grandma! I'm only 14 weeks and was planing in telling her this week but she was gone

sandrabrooke · September 2014

I'm sorry for your loss. I'll pray for you and your family.

allrightmeow · September 2014

Oh honey Im so very sorry. I think the letter in her coffin sounds like a lovely idea.

aylaroman15 · September 2014

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my paternal grandmother about 5 years ago and i've been going through times of sorrow recently, wishing she was here to experience another great grandchild. I miss her dearly because she was the sweetest woman on the planet but time has definately made the pain easier to deal with. I personally find comfort in knowing that she is in heaven with the lord cheering on the LO healthy arrival and watching over her family she left behind.

minirella · September 2014

Sorry for your loss.

Maebb · September 2014

I'm sorry for your loss. DH's grandfather died around the time I got pregnant with this baby, and we didn't know I was pregnant yet. I like to think that he's smiling down from heaven, so he'll still get to see this baby. Also I think about how death and birth are natural parts of life, and one life ended, but another new one is beginning.

I don't know if that is of any comfort to you, but again, I'm so sorry for the loss of your grandmom, and I hope you can find peace and healing.

nikkitaplin · September 2014

Well, she knows now!!!!!! Probably happily watching over that baby and you every day!!! Writing a letter is a good thing to do. We lost a baby boy at 19 weeks last year. This year on the one year anniversary, we sent lanterns up in the sky and my two other kids sent blue balloons up with a note attached to him. You are going to have some CRAZY emotions just because you are pregnant but then to add this....it might not hurt to talk to someone. Sometimes (at least for me) talking to a stranger is almost easier than talking to someone close to me. My ob's office has a grief counselor on staff just for situations like yours and mine and any others that may cause issues during pregnancy. My sons great grand father passed away a month before I found out I was pregnant. My son would have been the first great grandson. My son's middle name was his first name. Maybe you can honor her that way? Even if you end up having a boy, there has to be a way to incorporate her name into your child's. Prayers to you!

thiscoffeechick · September 2014

I'm sorry for your loss. Maybe you can include an ultrasound pic in the letter
You place in her coffin so he can "hold" your baby for eternity?

bohemianlc · September 2014

My grandmother passed away only one week before I was set to fly home and tell her about my pregnancy. Her health spiraled downhill very quickly and it was a shock that she passed before I could get there.

When I did arrive home, I spent an afternoon at her grave site telling her about the baby and just reflecting on her life, and it was really calm and peaceful. When we went through her house and belongings as a family, I focused on finding a few little items I could save for my son that I felt represented who she was as a person. I found journaling to be very therapeutic during this time.

Don't hesitate to let people know you are struggling and let them love on you. I'm really sorry for your loss and can understand what you're going through.

cnu_gurl · September 2014

I's so sorry for your loss. While pregnant with DD#1, my grandfather passed away unexpectedly, My mother had told him that I was pregnant, but I never got around to seeing him/talking to him myself... I was in an awful mess. with DD#2 my other grandfather passed away about 2 weeks after I told him I was pregnant. Now that I am pregnant with #3 I am worried about who else might pass away. But I know that all of my grandparents are looking down taking care of my babies. You just have to keep that in mind.

Want a personalized experience?

My nan pasted away and I never told her

Re: My nan pasted away and I never told her

Choose Another Board

Search Boards