So I still don't love other people's children...

artistewonder · September 2014

Just a thought...no one else to really share this with because I'll probably come off sounding terrible but even though I'm pregnant and I'm super excited and can't wait for this new little life coming into my world I still don't have that gushy feeling over children...in general. Now that alot of people know im pregnant they show me pictures of their kids and they want me to hold and play and converse with their children but I just don't feel it. Of course I slap on the big smile and break out the "Awws" but I feel like I don't know how to relate. I hope this doesn't translate to my own child...sometimes it worries me...my mom says it will come and I sure hope she's right. I feel like there's so many important things to think about and I'm a practical kind of person, even when I get my ultrasounds my husband is all smiley and emotional but I'm lying back straight faced, running down the checklist..."Do you see all it's limbs...is the heartbeating at the correct rate...does this look normal???"

Well, I wonder if anyone can relate...I just needed to get it off my chest...I don't want to be tempted to tell the next parent that pushes their child on to me I don't really care about your kid..I only care about the one I'm carrying...might not go over too well. lol Happy pregnancy ladies!

AlfiesMOM · September 2014

I generally for the most part can't stand other people's children! I love E more than anything in the world, I think everything she does is cute and amazing. I just can't stand other people's kids! I actually was just saying this to someone the other day.

Lanatir · September 2014

Other's kids and my siblings were a big reason I originally didn't want any kids EVER. Sometimes even well behaved other children just are not for me. Idk. I hated babysitting and I hate when people (especially say at like a church or play group) assume I'd be ok with watching children at some event I'm going to be at because I have a kid.

No... I spend all my day with my child (SAHM), the last thing I want to do is watch someone else's child(ren), too...

TXUltraRunner · September 2014

One of my favorite books

Milagros315 · September 2014

I don't care for other people's children either. Unless I'm related to them, I'm not interested. They're strangers. I don't ooh and ahh over strange adults, why would I do it over stranger babies?

emilyp2013 · September 2014

I'm comfortable with little kids, but I don't get oogly, either. They be like, "See my kid!!" I be like, "Looks like a kid...." I just don't get the mystified sentiments others seem to get. I can watch [most] kids without being irritated about it. But then there are just those other kids I cannot stand for greater intervals than maybe 1 hour. As a bonafide blunt jerk I do tell parents when I can only take so much of their kids, though (politely, and not necessarily providing specific reasons).

WormyGo · September 2014

I'm OK with others kids only because I know they are going away soon. My husband is also way more gooshy about the u/s etc.. I'm with you in that mostly checking off a list of possible problems that are being ruled out. In general I've been more gushy and excited about baby clothes which I think are often cuter than babies.

Cbeanz · September 2014

I felt just like you with my first, OP! Very practical and fact based, didn't choke up at my U/S, etc. Even when she was first born it took some time (2 weeks??) before I said "I love you" and meant it.

But now she's my favorite person to be around.

And with my 2nd pregnancy I'm soooo dopey over him/her bc I know how great it's going to be.

You are going to fall in love!

Other people's kids? Meh.

womberptyof4 · September 2014

I told my fiancé this one night and he told me I was heartless! I am so glad to know I am not alone. Other people's kids just annoy me...not everyone raises their children the same way so I'm just expected to deal with an annoying child with no manners...no thanks. I have a four year old who I love more than anything in the world but he even has a tendency to annoy me but he's so cute even still

Pips09 · September 2014

I love my kid like crazy, but I'm not wild about other people's kids.

musicgal05 · September 2014

I agree with you. I'm terrible with kids in general. And the whole needing to gush over somebody else's kid, I just, ugh. I hate to not put on a face and be all excited about somebody's squishy newborn, because otherwise I look like a mean baby-hater. But, they just lay there. And then they cry or poop when I hold them. And then when they get older, I'm just so awkward around them. Kids are weird.

Love my kid though, she's basically the best. And my nephews.

readyforround2 · September 2014

I don't really care for other peoples kids either. Like @yvonnesophie‌ said, if I had a choice between a kid and an animal, I'd play with the animal.

I get a long better with older kids because they understand my sarcasm, but when I see babies or toddlers all I can think of are weird smells and germs.

juls427 · September 2014

I feel the same about other peoples kids. Even babies. I always found it interesting that everyone MUST hold a new baby. If there's a newborn in the room I have no urge whatsoever to hold him/her. And believe it or not I actually want a lot of kids for myself. And this is really going to sound horrible...I don't even like my own nephew!!! Yea, I said it. I'm the biggest asshole in the world. It's just that kid is the spawn of satan and has behavioral issue that drive me insane!!!!

aerotigergirl · September 2014

Yeah, I'm not a super huge fan of other people's kids either. I guess, once DS was born, I was slightly more interested in them than I was before I had any kids.

But for the most part, meh.

I don't think this makes us bad parents or bad people. Just reasonable humans.

moonfaerie · September 2014

It's totally possible to have your own kid(s) and love him/her/them to pieces, and still not care for other kids. I'm like this, and so are a couple of my friends. I get a little googly over newborns, but toddlers and preschooler and big kids? Ugh, the constant chatter, movement, mess......

Honestly, if I had known just how annoying four-year-olds are, my oldest very well may have been an only child!

Stephij1 · September 2014

My best friend is like this. Apart from her own kids and the kids of a couple of very close friends (practically family), she doesn't particularly like kids. She was also very logical and unemotional during ultrasounds, etc. She's one of the most loving, devoted moms I've ever known. As for myself, I like kids a lot, but nothing compares to my own. It's not even close. Don't worry about it because as soon as you hold that baby, there's no going back. You'll be head over heels in love.

SpaceGirlSpiff · September 2014

I don't feel sincerely excited or into other kids besides my own either, unless they're related to me or maybe there's the odd kid here or there that cracks me up and I get along better with...but... In general I've never been the type that's interested in playing or being around kids and that didn't really change much even after I had my own... I don't dislike them (well, some I might actually dislike being around, lets be real), but like some PPs have said, I just don't get sincerely excited or thrilled over them.

My own? I'm over the moon for and love so much it hurts...so

How you feel about other people's kids is absolutely not a determinant in any way for how you'll be or feel as a parent...at all. The difference is pretty astounding to me. Does my own kid still annoy me? Absolutely... but my patience threshold is MILES higher for my own kids, and my love trumps the annoyance ....whereas with other kids, not so much.

Lola918 · September 2014

Agreed! I like newborns and gush over them, and I enjoy interacting with well behaved kids, but honestly most others not so much.

For me though it's more a product of bad manners than kids in general I'm not interested in, and I gotta say there are more and more little monsters out there!

ellasmama18 · September 2014

I like other peoples well behaved/pleasant kids.

The wild, out of control and saucy ones, not so much.

Valm999 · September 2014

That's exactly how I feel! I always felt annoyed with other peoples kids and I tought that the feeling will go away once I'll get pregnant. But nope... I still feel very neutral towards other babies and kids and aside from smiling at them or finding them cute have no desire to pick them up or play with them. I wonder if I'll soften up once my child will be born but I have a feeling that I won't lol happy to learn that I'm not the only one

artistewonder · September 2014

So awesome to read all of you sharing similar feelings! I don't have really close female friends and I don't wanna exhaust the family with my pregnancy brain...time and time again I'm so thankful for these message boards!

LuckyPenny1231 · September 2014

My kid: totally awesome & beautiful

Other kids: meh

Stargirlb · September 2014

Can't be a good mama unless u love all the world's children

sanbry · September 2014

I liked other people's kids until I had my own. Now I can't really be bothered. I do love to hold other people's babies bc I love babies but that's about it. I love mine. My husband hates other people's kids, always has lol.

BriannaCaitlin · September 2014

My grandma passed away in March and until then she would babysit a one year old whose parents I used to work with. They didn't have another babysitter, so my sister and I have been taking turns watching her until recently, and now it's just my sister. And watching her made realize that I don't care for other's children either. I would gag every time I changed her diaper and although she is absolutely adorable, I would much rather look from a distance. But I am SO excited about my little girls coming into the world soon. I already can't imagine life without them. My best friend was the same way, and her son is now a year old and she said it still hasn't changed. Lol.

artistewonder · September 2014

Stargirlb said:
Can't be a good mama unless u love all the world's children

I guess I won't be a good mom according to you....thanks for your outstanding insight

artistewonder · September 2014

impossible for me to know that... there's like a 100000 threads on here...I'm not quite noting people's personalities...A simple Lol clears up that sarcasm confusion...js

Stargirlb · September 2014

It's ok artistewonder we cant *all* be good mamas.

kolaczka · September 2014

I like my nieces or nephews and kids can be fun as they get older but generally I don't feel any real connection or need to be around them. I am very decidedly not a baby person.

Of course I am very much on the "not a hugger" camp so it really isn't terribly surprising.

SheHulk723 · September 2014

I'm glad I'm not the only one, I was just afraid to admit it haha. I cannot stand other people's children.

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