Was really hoping to avoid it this time around, but PPD/ PPA struck again. Currently taking 20 mg Lexapro and use 10 mg Ativan as an emergency med. My pysch recommended I see a therapist so I'll start that next week.
Feeling better but not 100% myself yet. I hate to say this, but I really struggle to enjoy mat leave. I love my job and I'm used to talking and interacting with lots of people daily. This can be lonely.
I still struggle with how I "should" feel with a newborn, and although I know it's a chemical predisposition, it still, well, sucks.
Anyone else?
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Re: any moms dealing with PPD/ PPA?
This is me exactly. I spent most of my life (age 15-30) struggling with severe social and general anxiety and crippling depression. I had tried damn near every medication over the years, saw so many therapists I lost count, and it wasn't until I turned 30 that I was finally able to put away the meds and wing it on my own. I felt awesome for 3 years....until I got pregnant. Warned my OB to watch me after delivery because I predicted ppd/ppa would happen. Sure enough, two weeks pp, I was asking for meds. I know it's not my fault, but it pisses me off. All those years to take one leap forward just to take several steps back. I hope I can crawl out of this quickly and enjoy this child I longed for for so many years. Here for support if you need it.
I've also struggled w anxiety for years... started having panic attacks in college (15 years ago). Normally I'm on 5mg Lexapro
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