Bed sharing/family bed

JmeJoLee83 · September 2014

J14 board is full of info and threads on many a topic but I'm yet to see one on this. I can't be the only mama bed sharing with my little. I get so tired of hearing the nasty comments about how "you're never going to get him to sleep alone now!" Since I have brought him to bed with us (me, DH, the dog and LO) we have all been sleeping better. I am trying to embrace the now and will worry about "later" later. Let's have a place to share tips, joys, and struggles of the family bed.

Eta: even if bed sharing is not your main or only method of sleep for LO feel free to post here anyway!

nunzchucks · September 2014

So, we do not bed share, but my friend who does recommended this book from La Leche League (note: it will be geared toward bf-ing). https://www.llli.org/sweetsleepbook

rainbowdashh · September 2014

I bed shared with my toddler. I would with this one too, but her reflux stops her from being able to nurse and lying down and then stay lying on her back. It does not last forever. It always annoyed my MIL because she felt our room should ours alone, especially our bed. I've wanted to tell her so many times that our sex life isn't her business but if she must know the couch works for us.

Anyway, I liked the family bed when she was small. Sharing a bed with her after about 18 months old sucked because we both like to sleep sprawled out. She sleeps better in her own room now and we both sleep better, but I miss the cuddling.

FAWKES81 · September 2014

I start my LO out in the PnP next to the bed but usually after his MOTN feeding he ends up in the bed with me. My DH was bitching about it this weekend (because before he was born I said I wouldn't do it). But I've got to get sleep sometime and if he's flailing around for an hour in the PNP I'm not sleeping. Once we get a decent monitor I plan on putting him in his crib but I'm not doing it until we have some sort of visual monitor as well as one with sound.

katekat8721 · September 2014

I bed share occasionally and I dig it. It's usually when theyre super fussy in the MOTN or in the morning when one's up early and I want to sleep in. I'd do it more if we had 1 baby instead of 2. I don't feel safe with both babies.

MNOpea · September 2014

I almost always bed shared for at least part of the night with my first, but he easily and happily sleeps alone in his crib now (he's 2). I also rocked and nursed him to sleep and was often told he would never fall asleep on his own and never sleep through the night because of those things.. But he does both now just fine. All this to say do what works for you and your family. I'm not aware of any adults who still need to sleep in bed with their mommy

MrsAy · September 2014

amoot890 said:
Just in the past week (she's almost 14 weeks) I've had her nap in the mornings in the big bed. I'll nurse her laying down and then she falls asleep for a few hours. It is the most sleep I can get in a bed at one time. We're still doing 3 feeds throughout the night. She's slept in her crib at night since day one and will go right back to sleep after diaper/nursing.

ETA: Stuck in the quote box
^This. I just started taking her to my bed for her morning nap. It feels so good, and we both get a good 2+ hours of sleep. I love the snuggles but I don't think I'll do it when DH is still in bed, he's a heavy sleeper.

nicolemcm · September 2014

I always said I would never bed share before he was born, but then my 1st pp period hit at 8 weeks and he got super fussy, so I took him to bed with me that week.

Now he goes to sleep from 10-4 or so in his crib and then comes to bed with me after a diap change and feeding. I just do not have the patience to be up for another 45-60 minutes after nursing to put him back to sleep and put him back in his crib and pray he stays asleep when I can just take him back to bed and he goes right to sleep.

As other pp's said, I would not have been comfortable bed sharing when he was so tiny and had no head control.

I do want to get him back into the crib full time, but we're not in any hurry.

ELC252011 · September 2014

She starts off in her RnP but after her first MOTN feeding I just lay her in bed with me. I will move the blankets and pillows to my side of the bed and swaddle her. I don't move much in my sleep so I'm not worried about hurting her or throwing the blanket over her. I'm planning on getting her to sleep in her crib after she's 6 months.

diagonalley · September 2014

I bedshare. It was not my plan initially, but it's how we get sleep. The past few weeks he's been sleeping 6-8 hour stretches. After we're done travelling in 2 weeks I'll try getting him to sleep more on his own because I head back to work two weeks after that.

jclester614 · September 2014

I usually nurse and snuggle in bed with my LO for the first morning nap. I would love to have him in the bed the whole night, but I sleep more lightly with him there (plus hubby doesn't want to).

fsumom · September 2014

Dh and I co-slept with our DD for 7 years! Okay, she was technically in her crib from 7-22 months but then we moved her back into our bed. I finally advised her that it was time to move to her bed. However, she still wants someone to lay with her at night so I don't plan on bed sharing with DS nearly as long. DS would not sleep anywhere but next to me when he was born. He would literally cry in his RNP or Pack N' Play as soon as I'd lay him down (after he was asleep). Once he came in the bed with me, we both get sleep. Plus, I nurse him. Since DH lays down with DD and falls asleep with her, DS and I get to share a king sized bed. Fine with me

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Cherylwang · September 2014

I always attempt to put LO in the bassinet for the first part of the night. Sometimes she stays in there for 6 hours. Sometimes it's a hour later and she wakes up and won't go back down. So I just lay her next to me and she's fast asleep. I think to myself. You little poop why won't you just sleep on your own. Overall you've got to do what you've got to do to get some sleep. I will move her to the crib maybe at 5 months. She will share a room with her 4 year old sister so I need her to sleep longer stretches before I put them in the room together.

sm623 · September 2014

We usually start the night with LO in her pnp. Her first stretch of sleep can be anywhere from a couple of hours up to 7 hours. After that first stretch, she's up again in about 45 minutes, so we always bed share after her first stretch of sleep. Sometimes if I have a feeling that she's going to be up a lot to eat because she napped all evening we just start off bed sharing. I never planned to bed share before she was born, but I feel safer doing side laying nursing than nodding off sitting up which is what was happening anyway.

Read247 · September 2014

My LO's eyes open as soon as I lay him down. Our only option is bed sharing. God I miss sleep!

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