A serious discussion - PPD

sagehens47 · September 2014

Hi ladies. I'm a FTM and already worried about the possibility of PPD. I have a history of serious depression and am staying on anti-depressants throughout my pregnancy. I know my triggers and the main one is big life changes.

I was hoping that people would feel comfortable enough sharing any experiences, as I know so many women who won't open up - to me that makes it scarier.

Does it creep in? Come on quickly? What kind of help did you get and how long did it take for you to come out of the black hole (that's my own term for my episodes). Any advice for newbies?

angelrx4 · September 2014

It crept up on me. I could feel myself becoming more detached/disengaged and sad. It took my husband pointing out to me that NOTHING was making me happy anymore for me to realize I had a problem. I think I was about 8 weeks PP when I saw my doctor. I took anti-depressants for 2-3 months and one day stopped taking them. I didn't bounce back immediately but I did feel like the fog lifted.

My advice? Talk to someone. By someone I mean your significant other, BFF, parent, whoever. Just make sure you're talking. It's easy to detach yourself from the world when you're sleep deprived and in survival mode. Get out of the house if you can. Have someone watch little one so you can have some me time. If people offer to help you LET THEM. I think my PPD was triggered because I had a winter baby and was secluded. I couldn't for walks, didn't want to take her out during flu season etc. I was stuck in our house watching bad tv all day with no one to talk to.

Also, I think it shows a lot that you are already preparing yourself for the possibility. I thought I was broken because I was suffering with PPD. None of my friends or family had dealt with it and it made me feel even worse.

chemgirlstl · September 2014

It crept up on me as well. Same as @angelrx4 - I was detached/disengaged and overall sad. It was also my husband telling me nothing was making me happy anymore at 6-8 weeks and my own mother admitting she too suffered from PPD and telling me to call the doctor and get on anti-depressants ASAP. I did and took them for about 4 months and also saw a therapist for about 6 sessions. After that I stopped taking the meds and just tried to work my way through my feelings with some of the advice/tools I got from the therapist.

I also had a winter baby and would agree 100% with @angelrx4 that it made it so much worse. I'm looking SO forward to this April baby because I know it will help to be able to get out and enjoy spring. But I also know what triggered it all in the first place (anxiety and feelings of inadequacy as a mother) and I'm going to be on the look out for those same feelings I had before and get help again sooner rather than later.

Being prepared and knowing that you may be more prone to it are great first steps. I thought I was suffering alone for the longest time. It helps to find others who have gone through it before to acknowledge that you're not the only one who has felt that way and it's ok to feel that way - just don't get stuck there.

ScarletOflaherty · September 2014

I had it between #2 and #3 and was on zoloft for about 8 months and it helped immensely. There's not much you can do to prevent it, but do keep in contact with your OB and therapist about it and be sure your OB knows this is a concern. Communication with your medical team will help ensure you are able to get help/meds you need as early as possible.

knitfastdiewarm · September 2014

My mother suffered from PPD and depression runs in our family. As a FTM, I am concerned about this as well. My mother has said she'll be watching for the signs and I have mentioned my concerns to my Midwife and my Doula so if anyone notices a change, they will say something. I don't know what to expect, but I am hoping that by making others aware of my fears, there will be enough people to intervene if there is a problem.

fitfam20 · September 2014

I suffered more from PPA than depression. I just felt really overwhelmed all the time and scared to be alone with my son. I had a winter baby and felt so secluded/trapped indoors and it just escalated. I was in denial that what I was feeling wasn't typical FTM issues so it took me a long time to talk to someone. I struggled until my son was about a year old.

nycitygirl1 · September 2014

You've got mail

ElizabethSwann · September 2014

It crept up on me.

I never thought i would get it, and i was not prepared at all. The hardest part was admitting it and the first official call to the OB, but after that everything else fell into place.

somewheresublime86 · September 2014

It's on my radar screen as well. I've taken anxiety meds off and on since junior high, so it's not a new problem - I'm just worried it will be worse/different post-partum. I'm in such a good place right now, but that's not always the case.

Thankfully, my hubby knows what to look for. I think I'll also ask my Mom to keep an eye out, as well as the doctor. I'm planning to keep taking a very low dose of Prozac, and will be taking advantage of any help people offer.

I'm very relieved not to be having baby in the middle of winter for the reasons you guys mentioned. Having it be cold and grey doesn't help the situation at all.

PassTheNachos · September 2014

I haven't dealt with this. I have heard of people encapsulating their placenta. It grosses me out, but maybe in pill form it wouldn't be as bad. I've heard it's amazing for PPD as well as helping milk production.

somewheresublime86 · September 2014

PassTheNachos said:
I haven't dealt with this. I have heard of people encapsulating their placenta. It grosses me out, but maybe in pill form it wouldn't be as bad. I've heard it's amazing for PPD as well as helping milk production.

I think I'm going to do it. Then again, I live in Portland, land of the hippies. In all seriousness though, I have a couple of friends who have done it and swear by it.

aeith11 · September 2014

I dealt with this after I had DD. For me it was gradual. I started to realize that after the exhaustion let up and she was sleeping better I was still down and detached. I cried all day and all night and I was miserable as a mother and a woman. So after some pushing from DH I went and saw my doc and got help and started feeling better. This time I am seriously considering placenta I capsulation or something similar. Hope this helps

picklesx · September 2014

I don't have experience with PPD, but have you discussed this with your mental health provider? S/he should be able to give you some major insight.

Good luck.

sagehens47 · September 2014

picklesx said:
I don't have experience with PPD, but have you discussed this with your mental health provider? S/he should be able to give you some major insight.

Good luck.

I have the best mental health providers out there and my OB is aware as well. I def want to be on top of this, but it always helps to hear others stories - no one should feel alone.

I also wanted to bring this up so other FTMs know that this can happen to anyone - it's nothing to be ashamed of, and there's always help out there.

Ashgal · September 2014

I had PPD badly after my first loss. I had a lot of anxiety while pregnant with my first son, so I stayed on the antidepressants throughout his pregnancy. I thought I was doing okay after having him, so I stopped and started having panic attacks and really bad anxiety, so went back on it. Then totally stopped right before my pregnancy with my second son. I was fine for about a month after having DS#2 and my anxiety started coming back again, so I went back on the antidepressants. I was able to totally go off them when DS#2 was about 18 months and have not gone back on since. I really hope I don't need to go back on them after this baby, but I now can recognize when the anxiety is starting to kick in and will go back on them if I feel I need them again. PPD is very scary and can come on suddenly or creep up. So if you feel off in any way, make sure you reach out to someone and at least share your thoughts/feelings.

risplace · September 2014

I had it with my son. It was so gradual and actually I've thought and thought about it and I don't think it came on until about 3 months after he was born. I was tired 24/7 and not interested in anything. I because super anxious, stressed, depressed and I developed BED (binge eating disorder) as a coping tool (not one I recommend). My son was a Medicaid baby and so by the time I realized I had PPD I no longer had insurance to go see someone about getting help. I'm still battling the repercussions and my son is 15 months. My suggestion, the minute you suspect, please go get help!!

trlricha · September 2014

It hit me very hard a few days after my son was born. I had uncontrollable crying and I couldn't eat. When I tried to eat, I would vomit. That combined with breastfeeding resulted in some scary weight loss. I felt like the world was collapsing and I had no control at all. I was put on Zoloft and everything got better. I quit taking it after a few months and it was pretty much gone. Don't suffer with it if you think have signs. Get to a doctor and get some help!

This and that · September 2014

It crept up and then one day I looked around and saw what a dark place I was in. I was on meds and counseling for a little. Mine really seemed to be related to the built up of going back to work, so once I was back and adjusted quickly I felt a lot better.

SuperFudge00 · October 2014

A coworker of mine has returned from maternity leave and she has PPD bad. She is getting help but is still struggling. When I asked if there was anything I could do her response was, "Just pray it doesn't happen to you." My heart aches for her.

bishbecraycray · October 2014

I just want to say, don't psyche yourself out ! I have a history of depression/anxiety too and was very lucky not to have PPD either time. So maybe you will be fortunate enough not to have to go through it. Just be proactive, and make sure you know the warning signs/symptoms and that your SO does as well. A couple friends of mine who dealt with it were in denial that PPD is what was going on, and it took SO's and a couple close friends to convince them to get help.

jk3610 · October 2014

I'm a ftm but i've suffered from depression for a long time. I plan to continue to see my therapist throughout the pregnancy and especially after. Hope you stay well!!

myeumyeu · October 2014

Im a FTM with chronic depression basically my whole life. I am staying on my antidepressants through my pregnancy, and will be continuing therapy for the forseeable future.

Since you know what depression is like, don't wait to ask for help when you feel it coming on.

You probably already know a few things that help you, make sure you and your loved ones have a plan to ensure you get those things.

For example, I know that meditation helps me. My husband knows its high priority for me to make time, every day.

Managing depression sure is hard work! Sometimes I think of it more as a physical disability, it relieves some of the guilt.

EmmaSF · October 2014

Stay on your meds and keep seeing your therapist. Also, have your family and partner read up on PPD so they know what the warning signs are. Remember, a certain level of "baby blues" is normal but it shouldn't be debilitating.

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