Step-Mom check in?

lisap0924 · August 2014

Would any step-moms be interested in a weekly check in? I would be happy to get it going if we have enough interest.

I've noticed quite a few step moms on this board and I'm curious if anyone else feels like they could use some support?

Someday's I feel like I could use all the support/advice I can get! Step parenting is hard work and its not for everyone.

SmiLeeMom · August 2014

I'm not a step mom but have ha several step parents and makes me happy that you care enough!!!!!! So many don't.

lisap0924 · August 2014

awe thanks! I am a full time step mom. my SS has lived with us since he was 5, he is 8 now.

some days are hard. really hard. but I love him with all my heart

bartlettlisa · September 2014

I would love a step mom check-in. My SS is with us EOW and everything is 50/50. It by far is the hardest job ever! It is def not for everyone. SS is 6 and I have been part of his life since he was 2.

lisap0924 · September 2014

Awesome! I hope we get more step moms who are interested too

And I agree, def the hardest job I have ever had! But also the most rewarding

jaspears0816 · September 2014

I am a stepmom too. My SS goes to school and spends most of the time with his mom in NC. We live in NY. I'd love a stepmom check in, especially in the summer. We have him all summer and it's very difficult as we run a very different household than his mom. Good idea!

kcbizme · September 2014

I'm definitely interested! I'm not "officially" a stepmom but I consider myself one anyway because I've been in SD's life since she was 9 months old and she's 2 now. Her dad and I are planning to get married sometime in the near future and we obviously have a little brother or sister on the way for her now!

MrsZ1891 · September 2014

I would love this too! We have a really complicate situation as DH is not biologically SD's father but he raises her for most of her life before her mom and him broke up. This is a really tough role for me to fill!

PAkathy · September 2014

Like @kcbizme‌, I'm not officially a stepmom either, but SD is 8 and is going to be staying with us soon. Her dad and I are also planning on getting engaged and married within the next year and a half. Sometimes it's hard, but I love her to death.

lisap0924 · September 2014

@PAkathy‌ @kcbizme‌ I was not an "official" step mom until May of this year, but I considered myself a step mom all along. I started playing the role when he came to live with us 3 years ago so I accepted the title. You should too if you are playing the roll

lisap0924 · September 2014

jaspears0816 said:
I am a stepmom too. My SS goes to school and spends most of the time with his mom in NC. We live in NY. I'd love a stepmom check in, especially in the summer. We have him all summer and it's very difficult as we run a very different household than his mom. Good idea!

Yes it's challenging when BM runs a different household.
SS has no real rules or responsibilities at mom's house.

jaspears0816 · September 2014

Same here, and since we don't have him often it's always a fight. We are hoping things go well with the baby and there isn't too much jealousy.

ebtanker · September 2014

I would love this as well. SS are 14 and 12 and have been living with us fulltime for the past 3 years. I love them but it can be very difficult at times.

lisap0924 · September 2014

Awesome! I love that we have some interest!

the bump does have a mixed family board, but it's nice to share with people who are In a similar situation (same birth month, same symptoms, ect)

sjep922 · September 2014

This sounds like a good idea! I have a SD who turns 9 next month. I have been in her life since she was 17 months so she doesn't even know life without me in it!

It can definitely be a struggle but I wouldn't change it for the world! We split 50/50 custody with her mom.

tmh122 · September 2014

I'd love it! I'm not technically a step mom either but I've been in my boyfriends, sons life since he was 4 months and now he's 3! It's definitely not for everyone, especially when you have to deal with your partners ex girlfriend every other day lol

lisap0924 · September 2014

tmh122 said:
I'd love it! I'm not technically a step mom either but I've been in my boyfriends, sons life since he was 4 months and now he's 3! It's definitely not for everyone, especially when you have to deal with your partners ex girlfriend every other day lol

@tmh122‌ oh I hear you! Dealing with BM is not always pleasant! It has been downright awful for me, BUT the last 5 months has been great. Knock on wood

cieragear · September 2014

I would be interested! I have a 10 year old stepson who I have known since he was about 18 months. Our relationship is amazing. He doesn't know any other life then his Dad and me together. I love him like he is my own but being a stepmom can be a thankless job. A lot of people don't understand how strong that relationship can be and nothing hurts worse than the recent, "You are going to be such a good mom!" Umm I stepped up for that job voluntarily a long time ago : )!

lisap0924 · September 2014

cieragear said:
I would be interested! I have a 10 year old stepson who I have known since he was about 18 months. Our relationship is amazing. He doesn't know any other life then his Dad and me together. I love him like he is my own but being a stepmom can be a thankless job. A lot of people don't understand how strong that relationship can be and nothing hurts worse than the recent, "You are going to be such a good mom!" Umm I stepped up for that job voluntarily a long time ago : )!

Exactly! I feel like people don't understand what it's like to be a step mom and how hard it really can be.
All parents give selflessly, but a step parent give and rarely "get back" until the child is older and realizes.

Last night I found a coke with my husbands name on it. The coke right next to it was his ex's name (BM) so I took a picture because I thought it was ironic. I showed the pic to SS and H and SS "oh if they only had my name then it would be the whole family" it hurt.

I think he seen the hurt on my face because then he added in "oh and you and the baby too"
He didn't mean to be hurtful so I couldn't be mad, but it still hurts.

lisap0924 · September 2014

cieragear said:
I would be interested! I have a 10 year old stepson who I have known since he was about 18 months. Our relationship is amazing. He doesn't know any other life then his Dad and me together. I love him like he is my own but being a stepmom can be a thankless job. A lot of people don't understand how strong that relationship can be and nothing hurts worse than the recent, "You are going to be such a good mom!" Umm I stepped up for that job voluntarily a long time ago : )!

Exactly! I feel like people don't understand what it's like to be a step mom and how hard it really can be.
All parents give selflessly, but a step parent give and rarely "get back" until the child is older and realizes.

Last night I found a coke with my husbands name on it. The coke right next to it was his ex's name (BM) so I took a picture because I thought it was ironic. I showed the pic to SS and H and SS "oh if they only had my name then it would be the whole family" it hurt.

I think he seen the hurt on my face because then he added in "oh and you and the baby too"
He didn't mean to be hurtful so I couldn't be mad, but it still hurts.

lisap0924 · September 2014

Oops. Looks like that posted twice. Im not sure how to delete it

cieragear · September 2014

I feel your pain! There have been a few situations over the years where I couldn't help but have hurt feelings. Especially when BM tries to minimize my relationship with SS.

It helps to hear similar stories and ladies who are in the same shoes!

lisap0924 · September 2014

So, does anyone have a day preference? It doesn't matter to me. I don't want to "impose" on any of the other check in's

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