Back to work - need moral support

Re: Back to work - need moral support

• ricekez member

  September 2014

  Just take it one day at a time. You can do this. It gets easier as you and LO get your routine down.

  

  

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• traveltheworld member

  September 2014

  I had a planned pregnancy but struggled a lot in the beginning with enjoying my time with the baby. I know a lot of women gush about the newborn phase, but I hated it. I could have taken more time off work but chose to go back early, then felt incredibly guilty about it. It's absolutely true that some people are just not cut out to be SAHMs. To be completely honest, DS is 2 now and although I enjoy being with him infinitely more than when he was a baby, I still can only spend a few days at a time with him all by myself before getting bored/irritated. I've finally accepted that there's nothing wrong with that. I spend tons of time in the evenings and weekends with DS and we have a very strong bond.
  
  And yeah, my old life, as I knew it, was over for the most part. I can't just hang out with friends after work, can't go on weekend trips with DH on a whim, can't sleep in on weekends etc. And I do miss that. But my "new" life with DS is pretty awesome - I get to talk to and teach this incredibly funny and interesting little person, I get to just sit at a park for hours doing nothing but enjoy the weather and the laughter of my child - all this is to say that you'd adjust and learn to enjoy things you never thought you'd enjoy before.
  
  Don't feel guilty about not wanting to spend every minute of every day with your child. She will be fine with others and will benefit more from having a mother who is engaged and happy.

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• kikimeemee member

  September 2014

  I think it's wonderful you want to continue working! You'll be a better mom if you are engaged in activities/work that make you happy. Each family figures out what is best for them!

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• MommyAtty member

  September 2014

  I was exactly like you, except I planned my pregnancies. But both times, at the end of maternity leave, I was dying to get back to being me. I'm a great mom, totally TOTALLY in love with my kids. But I'm also a great lawyer, totally in love with practicing law. It took me a while to get over feeling guilty or abnormal for absolutely wanting to work. Then I realized I'm a much better mom as a working mom.

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• NADA-H member

  September 2014

  traveltheworld said:

  ...  Don't feel guilty about not wanting to spend every minute of every day with your child...

  that's exactly how I feel..it helps to know other moms feel the same way and that it would eventually get better..sleep deprived like crazy right now (second day at work) as I go to bed after she does (around midnight) and she wakes up once during the night about an hour before I have to get up for the day so I end up with 5 disturbed hours of sleep and I'm up on my feet all day at work and evening at home! how long did it take you guys to settle into going back to work?

  
  God Bless You my Little One
  Farida, our first child, born on the 19th of July 2014
  
  Farida, at 8 weeks
  
  

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• jtmomma13 member

  September 2014

  I cried like a baby the first day I dropped LO off at daycare for a trial run. It's okay to be upset and sad and it's OKAY to want to be a working mom. Be proud of yourself for knowing what is right for you and YOUR FAMILY! 

  
  

  I read your other post about sleep and saw you comment here about sleep. At 6 weeks it's really tough to get into a schedule. If LO is gaining weight and your pedi isn't worried then I would not be waking LO up for feedings. It  might give you a long stretch of sleep. Midnight is really late to be going to bed. But at 6 weeks there isn't much you can do about it. I would try and get into a little bit of a routine. Try at maybe 9 or 10 to do a warm bath and low lights and see if you can get LO down a little earlier. Leave some of the housework and the non necessity tasks for another day. Things are crazy when you get back to work but it will slow down soon once you get into a groove.  

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• Peanutz21 member

  September 2014

  i hear you!

  
  

  due to my irregular and inconsistent work schedule, we end up paying for FT daycare (5d a week, up to 10 h a day) but there are days here and there i have half or the full day off because i also work on evenings and weekends. 

  
  

  today i don't work until this evening and because i needed time to do "regular things" - grocery shop, clean, laundry, (hey maybe even get a pedicure....i know it's a stretch!) i did drop LO off at daycare this morning.

  
  

  i feel incredibly guilty because mentally i don't have work until 7pm, i'm thinking that i should be spending my time with her all day but then i know i wouldn't get anything around the house done either.

  
  

  to help with my guilt i tell myself it makes me more balanced and happy therefore my time with LO will be better too - also my house will hopefully be a little cleaner and DH and I can enjoy ourselves when we have time together at home. 

  
  

  hang in there!

  
  

  TTC#2
  

  

  Our little IVF miracle born 5/7/2014

  

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