February 2015 Moms

Outed at work before you were ready?

Has this happened to anyone else?

I'm a teacher and had hoped to keep my pregnancy under wraps for the first few weeks of school- at least long enough to get through Open House and Curriculum Night so that my new classroom parents could get to know me before worrying about my maternity leave.  Well, at Open House, the mom of a former student came in and said REALLY loudly "OH MY GOSH, how far along are you???"  When I just stared at her, she started laughing, pointed at my baby belly and said "Oh, honey, you can't hide THAT!"  It ended up being fine b/c the other families laughed about it and no one has even asked me about maternity leave, etc., but I really wish she hadn't outed me so soon!  I'm planning to formally announce my pregnancy to them after my anatomy scan next month through my weekly class email.
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Re: Outed at work before you were ready?

  • I was planning on telling my boss at 12 weeks but had to go to her sooner because a colleague started spreading rumors that I was pregnant. This person had no reason to suspect I was she just came to this conclusion on her own. Turns out she was right, but I wasn't ready for everyone to know yet. I went to my boss and explained the situation and she was very understanding and supportive. It sucks though when you are pushed into sharing before you are ready. 
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  • delaneykaidelaneykai member
    edited August 2014
    @Valentino2013 -that stinks that your co-worker would spread rumors like that! :(
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  • @lindseysquared‌ - oh my gosh... This exact same thing happened to me!!! We had open house on Thursday, and while I'd told 2 coworkers and my principal, I was hoping to not tell parents for a few weeks. I had a parent and student from 2 years ago stop by to say hi and the mom was like, "so, whatcha got going on under there?!"... Eek! I was wearing a (somewhat fitted) black dress with a big cardigan and didn't think it was that noticeable...

    Here's hoping she doesn't start any gossip in the next few weeks...
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  • @Wimcgrath - are we the same person?! :)  Mine was a student from 2 years ago and I was wearing a black dress, big cardigan and a scarf to try to camouflage the bump! :)

    I had already told my principal and 2 coworkers (who told many others), so I just figured it was time to just give it up and celebrate the bump. :)  Fingers crossed your former parent doesn't start any gossip!
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  • @lindseysquared‌ - ha! That is too funny. We must be the same person. Good luck to you- I'm glad everyone just laughed it off and didn't press you on it. Hopefully this is a trend that continues!
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  • Happened to me too! I had told my boss, but not anyone else (not even my bf's family) & this girl found out that I was pregnant. Instead of confirming it with me, or asking me or my boyfriend, she told our entire store.
  • I was outed way before my first ultrasound, way way way sooner than I was expecting to tell my boss, by a nurse at my previous OBs office; she's a customer of ours. And I knew she was due in that day and asked her not to say anything. Well I guess she decided that she needed to open up her big fat mouth in front of my boss later that day. My boss has been pissed at me, and treating me absolutely horribly, ever since. I hope I get this new job I interviewed for last week, they know I'm 16 weeks and still interviewed me. Being outed before you're ready to share is never fun, I'm sorry that happened to you.
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  • @foxslaw - that is awful!  It's annoying that she would think anything at all.  I'm sorry she told everyone at your store.

    @StephanieLBerg - OMG, that is the worst!  Wouldn't that be a HIPPA violation on her part?
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  • @lindseysquared‌ yes it is a violation of HIPPA, but do you think anyone is going to do anything about it if I complain? I was backhanded in the face at one of my old jobs, and when I filed a complaint, I found my ass in hot water for it! How is it that I am in trouble for being physically abused at work? I don't trust the system anymore, so I just gave her some choice words and moved on.
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  • @StephanieLBerg‌ I think you should complain to your previous on offce and your HR. You should NOT have to deal with that bs!
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