Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Vag vs C section
I'm just waiting to see what the baby positions will be at around 37-38 weeks and then we will make a decision from there. I'm kind of worried about a C-section just because there are more risks but that is personal. This is what we will do:
Baby A has to be in the head down position for me to even try a vaginal birth. I'm told that Baby B can be manipulated if not in the correct position, so basically Baby A will be the one to make the decision as to whether a C-section will be scheduled. Mine are transverse and Baby A is on the bottom. However, I don't know whether Baby B could potentially get into position and then Baby A can be manipulated or if due to their locations it is totally dependent on Baby A.
I'll just be going with the flow, I'm really open to whatever as long as I'm okay and the babies are healthy.
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
Me: 32, DH: 34 / TTC since February 2011 / SA: all normal, HSG: all clear! / on Lovenox for anticardiolipid antibodies
4 IUIs with Clomid, Letrozole, and Menopur. All BFN.
9/12: lap / hysteroscopy: found and removed mild endometriosis, cervical polyp, and 2 para-tubular cysts
5/13 IVF #1: Follistim, Menopur, Ganirelix, 10R/4M/4F, ET of 2, 5 cell and 4 cell, no frosties = BFN
12/13 IVF #2 = November / December 2013. Microdose Lupron Protocol: 15R/6M/6F, Froze all 6 due to high E2 and P4
FET 1: Jan 22, 2014 of one 4AB blast and one 3BB blast (3 blasts on ice!)
BFP on HPT 4dp5dt, Beta #1 9dp5dt: 310, Beta #2 11dp5dt: 899
First u/s on 2/17/14: TWINS!!!!! both w/HBs of 114 at 6w3d, HBs 150 and 152 at 7w5d
5/27/2014: Team purple!!!! EDD 10/10/2014 /
Baby Boy 4lbs 1oz, 17 inches
Baby Girl 3lbs 5oz, 16 inches
Right ovary removed 09.04.2012 via vertical laparotomy
Essure implant placed on remaining tube 06.13.2013; successful followup scan 09.30.2013
Our family blog
One plus about a vaginal birth is the recovery time. My sister has had three c-sections and she said the recovery is extremely hard!
Age: 35 TTC since 2005, MFI & DOR
IVF #1 Sep '11 - canceled poor response
IVF #2 Nov '11 8R/8M/4F 3dt x2 - chemical
IVF #3 April '12 11R/6M/4F 3dt x2 - m/c
FET #1 Aug 2012 3dt x2 - BFN
**new RE**
IVF #4 Jan '13 BFN 11R/6M/6F 5dt x2 - BFN
IVF #5 July '13 16R/10M/10F 5dt x2 + 1 frostie
9dp5dt Beta 1 = 344!! 16dp5dt. Beta 2 = 4822 7wk u/s= 2 heartbeats!
Twin girls! 3/6/14
But in the end I just want healthy babies and mommy, whichever way that has to happen.
I've only had a singleton and triplets so 2 cs...super easy recovery! Running again in a week.
No periods due to 17 years of ballet and distance running after college. Zero response to 2 months of Clomid, little response to Letrozole. IUI left with 9 cysts = too many viable eggs due to age. On to IVF. Low dose of all meds still produced 37 mature eggs 12.6.11. Froze due to overstimulation.
FET #1.1 1.22.12 BFN. FET #1.2 2.22.12=GRACE! (and a vanishing twin).
Grace Katherine born 10.25.12 @ 36w6w 6#14oz 19.5".
FET #1.3 3.2013 BFN FET#1.4 4.2013 BFN. Never tried a fresh transfer. Let's try, despite 10 still frozen.
ER 6.26.13 27 mature eggs, slight overstim. ET 7.1.13 ectopic, FET 2.1 9.10.14 TRIPLETS!!
Boys born 3.18.14 @ 29w5d. Andrew Jack 3#6oz 16", Grant Robert 3#9oz 16", Charles Phillip 3#7oz 17".
Age: 35 TTC since 2005, MFI & DOR
IVF #1 Sep '11 - canceled poor response
IVF #2 Nov '11 8R/8M/4F 3dt x2 - chemical
IVF #3 April '12 11R/6M/4F 3dt x2 - m/c
FET #1 Aug 2012 3dt x2 - BFN
**new RE**
IVF #4 Jan '13 BFN 11R/6M/6F 5dt x2 - BFN
IVF #5 July '13 16R/10M/10F 5dt x2 + 1 frostie
9dp5dt Beta 1 = 344!! 16dp5dt. Beta 2 = 4822 7wk u/s= 2 heartbeats!
Twin girls! 3/6/14