OPP Tuesdays pg/babies/kids mentioned

theholmanherd · August 2014

This is the place to talk about other people's pregnancies without the warnings (within this post). My only thing this week is all the photos on Facebook. It's all over the place and from close friends, so I can't easily hide them. Please feel free to rant or whatever!

theholmanherd · August 2014

stupid iPad formatting. Sorry guys

lebradford · August 2014

I skipped the first day of school for teachers (aka meetings) partially because I had an appointment, but (if I'm being honest) mostly because I knew there would be pregnancy announcements and clapping because there is every year and I just couldn't handle it right now with everything that's going on.

**loss mentioned**

Well, I was right. There was an announcement, and I'm glad I missed it. But, yesterday it occurred to me that I'm on a committee with the girl who announced so I have a meeting with her and like 10 other people every week. That means that every Wednesday morning I'll have the joy of hearing them gush over her belly and and ask her about her nursery and stuff. To top everything off, her due date is only a couple of months before mine would have been. I think I'm going to come to dread those meetings. :-(

lisa89760 · August 2014

I'm already trying to think of ways to get out of a work lunch on Friday because one of my work friends told me she was pregnant yesterday. I feel horrible, but I just don't know if I can be around it yet. We are all getting together in a couple weeks to meet another girls new baby, and I might try and come with an excuse for that too. Both of these girls claimed to have trouble getting pregnant but it only took them a couple months of trying before getting pregnant. I hate that I try and get out of things like this...it just isn't me. But I also don't want to put myself in situations that will make me upset. uhhhh so frustrating!

cautiouslydomestic · August 2014

I am to the point where I am numb to other people's pregnancies.... Which is a blessing and a curse. However, this week has been exceptionally hard, and it's hitting too close to home. For example, my 17 year old pregnant sister saying that it "really sucks" she can't go to her prom this year. Yeah, you will be about 38 weeks pregnant. I can't say that I am that upset for you.

dancerspose · August 2014

This weekend was a difficult one for me. We went to my nephew's bris. I'm so happy for my brother and SIL, but it was such an emotionally tough weekend with all the joy for them and sadness for myself, not to mention all the not so subtle hints from all the family present about when will it be my turn. DH was trying to be supportive, but he's much more optimistic (or in denial) about things than I am. Then we came home to a shower invite for his BF whose girlfriend is KU and three different ultrasound pics on FaceBook...it's neverending. Sometimes I feel like I'm in some Twilight Zone thing with all the pregnancies around me, but I know it's just cause I'm at that age where everyone I know is having babies...

shirleymaeby · August 2014

@kkeglar13 - Holy crap how insensitive...and rude! Who the hell says that kind of stuff?

Girl on my team who has known about my IF struggles for 3 years got KU on IUI #5 a couple months ago. She's turned into a total shit about it.

Last week she says to me "Maybe now just isn't the right time for you. I believe our bodies know when the right time is for all of us." She follows this gem up with "I mean, you're still in school. Do you even have time for a baby?"

I came very close to asking her if she didn't think she was too old for a baby (she's almost 40...no I don't actually think that's too old but she's sensitive about it and was being a bitch) just to be an asshole but I didn't.

I am about to start a countdown clock on my desktop for her going on mat leave. January cannot come fast enough. She's also taking 6 months maternity leave. I'm hoping the timing works out that I will get KU and go on mat leave right before she comes back so I can spend 9 glorious months away from her.

As of Sunday I was one week FB free! After the last BFP announcement I got on there (8 weeks! Seriously!) I couldn't handle it anymore and took the app off my phone and stopped going on there. I feel so free!!!

ETA: punctuation!

chicory · August 2014

Pregnancy whine from someone I work with: "I really wanna do the ice bucket challenge, but since I'm pregnant my nipples are too sore. They even hurt when I go in the pool!" Blech.

dancerspose · August 2014

@kkeglar13 sounds like your coworker needs and early TP, even with being pregnant! And thanks for the advice about DH. We're still pretty early on in the process, and I'm thinking that's why he hasn't totally accepted things yet. Not to be crass about it, but I have a feeling when we have to start discussing the finances of potential treatments he'll realize how serious this all is.

@NariaDreaming I could understand that video hitting you so hard, sorry to hear it. There's something about watching people find out their going to be parents and grandparents that is so much harder for me then just seeing a "We're Expecting" announcement.

shirleymaeby · August 2014

@NariaDreaming - That must have been rough. Luckily none of my friends are creative enough to make videos. The last couple of announcements I have seen on FB have been stolen right from Pinterest so at least I've seen all the ways the information can be thrown at me.

theholmanherd · August 2014

@kkeglar13, gender/sex disappointment is frustrating. I understand it feels real to them, but it still sucks for those of us struggling with IF. A close friend struggled with this and I felt bad for her, but it was still hard for me. We finally talked about it and it's fine now, but it was difficult. Her comment about football season, movies, and c-sections (because labor is too long) makes me think she doesn't want a baby and she is feeling sorry for herself. Still sucks to hear, and she needs to get over it.

@kmdecoux, I hope you get those 9 months

Sorry she's such a bitch. I would have been pissed about the school comment.

My OPP may involve triggers. It was rough for me to hear, so don't read it if you aren't having a strong IF day.

****

One of my best friends has a man whore BIL and he knocked up a girl he barely knew after they slept together one time. Oh, and she's 19. He's like 30-something. Gross. That was bad enough, but then she tells me that her brother (who lives with said BIL) overheard a conversation where they discussed the sex of the baby. They both agreed, vehemently, that they want a boy. They proceeded to say that if they are having a girl, they will give her up for adoption because they don't want her. WTAF? My friend's husband agreed they will adopt her so she stays in the family, but that's so awful. Nothing is set in stone yet, but that was a punch in the gut. And for my friend, too. She really wants a second baby and would love to have a girl, but she can't afford to get pregnant right now, so she said this really hurt her, too. I just don't understand that level of fucked up.

theholmanherd · August 2014

chicory said:

Pregnancy whine from someone I work with: "I really wanna do the ice bucket challenge, but since I'm pregnant my nipples are too sore. They even hurt when I go in the pool!" Blech.

This made me snort. HUGS

shirleymaeby · August 2014

@theholmanherd...What. The. Fuck. Seriously...we might all want to consider a throat punch Tuesday up in this piece.

@kkeglar13 - I know right?? It took her 5 IUIs and donor sperm to get KU and she wants to tell me that our bodies know when it's the right time? She's the poster child for bodies not knowing when the right time is. I couldn't believe it. I think my face probably went purple with rage. It is a miracle that I kept it together.

Hollowvic · August 2014

I'm sick of seeing my pregnant neighbor that doesn't have custody of her older child because she is in and out of rehab for Heroin addiction. Yet she had no problem getting KU, TWICE!!!

theholmanherd · August 2014

kmdecoux said:

@theholmanherd...What. The. Fuck. Seriously...we might all want to consider a throat punch Tuesday up in this piece.

I'm very interested in TPing them. I just can't even comprehend their logic. I get being surprised, but seriously, he's 30 something years old, what the fuck did he think would happen? Oh, and she claims she was a virgin and somehow also claims she was infertile somehow (I think this was her, could be transposing bitches). Who the fuck knows ANYTHING about IF if they are virgins, 19 years old, or not trying to get pregnant? Anyway, sounds like she did it on purpose, but he should have used a fucking condom.

theholmanherd · August 2014

Rumbera28 said:

This is sort of the opposite of an OPP, but still. DH's sister just got her tubes tied because she gets pregnant if her DH just "breathes on her". She is annoyed that he kept dragging his feet on a vasectomy.

I deadpanned that I'll never have that problem.

For some reason, that comment really pisses me off. Shut the front door, Rumbera's SIL!

Hollowvic · August 2014

I second what @kikimo327‌ said. That's just fucked up!!! Where do these people come from???

BKBABY3 · August 2014

This was just perfect timing for this post. My BFF just had her second two days ago (2 weeks after my original due date that ended in loss). So, it's been a rough week.

She is so super sweet and supportive of me, too, so I can't be pissed at her or avoid the situation. Tonight I'm stopping by her house to say hello and bring some food (I avoided the hospital like the plague), but I'm a little nervous I might lose my shit. I meant to drop the stuff off before she got home, but wasn't able to make it. So wish me some strength to get through this with a smile on my face, particularly with her whole family there! If it weren't for the 2WW, I would be heading straight to the bar afterwards.

Radiantly · August 2014

My Buddy is 5 weeks. She and I have been trying together. Bummed.

jenmcD11 · August 2014

BKBABY3 Be strong. You are a good friend.

I have to go back to teaching tomorrow and I am dreading seeing a friend of mine that is due at the beginning of November. She started trying 6 months after me and got pregnant right away. I was the only person that knew for the first four months and she had a lot of ups and downs with a high risk pregnancy. I did my best to be supportive, because she is a good friend but she was also super clueless about my feelings and as soon as she knew the fetus was healthy and started telling other people, I subtly backed away from her. I haven't seen her all summer.

I know that she will be huge tomorrow and so excited to show everyone and it will hurt. She will ask me about my summer and I will want to tell her that it sucked. Besides teaching summer school to help raise money for fertility treatments, I found it painful waiting around to see my RE even though I tried to take my mind off of it.

Champs28 · August 2014

I can't believe I'm late to this board after the weekend that I had! Baby Shower during the day and then dinner with newly pregnant couple at night. The newly pregnant couple is DH's best friend and wife. I was really anxious because I knew I wouldn't be able to hold it together if all we talked about was the pregnancy. They don't know about our IF. So we see them and I congratulate them and she's already showing yada yada

She talks for like two minutes about how the first two months she felt horribly sick and that's since gone so she's been feeling fine. Ok great. Move on to dinner and every things going really well. We are reminded of the pregnancy when we all agree not to order wine (and by all i meant everyone but me agreed but i just went along with it). But so far, I'm doing great! We are all catching up and not talking about the baby too much at all.

And then comes dessert..... when the wife tells me that this pregnancy was UNPLANNED! They were going to start thinking about trying maybe in the fall but then BAM! And while they didn't elaborate on how, they were employing the same BC methods they've used since getting married (I'm assuming abstaining from sex during fertile part of cycle and pulling out).

And that's why I drank a bottle of wine when we got home that night

Chasity08 · August 2014

After my friend's announcement of her 2nd pregnancy that she doesn't want that I mentioned in a post last week...I have had the worst time not being bitter and saying things like "well clearly I don't deserve this."

*****And although it says no warnings are needed, I'm going to put a warning here about a child being mentioned*******

Last night I had to go to a back to school night thing for my DD, and there are a couple of sets of parents there that have about 27 children each and live off the state and I just cannot stand seeing them. This is not a matter of not believing in state help, I believe in it, but if you cannot take care of yourself, or your family, on your own...stop having children. (end rant)

Anywhoo...We're waiting in line and what do I see....they're BOTH KU again. you have got to be KIDDING ME. GAH! And then I get to the front of the line to pay the $30 textbook fee, and one of the moms comes up, butts in front of me while I'm writing out my check, and tells the book keeper lady that she just can't afford to pay the $30 fee so she hopes they will take care of it for her, all while rubbing her clearly pregnant belly. I could've screamed.

theholmanherd · August 2014

Chasity08 said:

After my friend's announcement of her 2nd pregnancy that she doesn't want that I mentioned in a post last week...I have had the worst time not being bitter and saying things like "well clearly I don't deserve this."
*****And although it says no warnings are needed, I'm going to put a warning here about a child being mentioned*******

Last night I had to go to a back to school night thing for my DD, and there are a couple of sets of parents there that have about 27 children each and live off the state and I just cannot stand seeing them. This is not a matter of not believing in state help, I believe in it, but if you cannot take care of yourself, or your family, on your own...stop having children. (end rant)
Anywhoo...We're waiting in line and what do I see....they're BOTH KU again. you have got to be KIDDING ME. GAH! And then I get to the front of the line to pay the $30 textbook fee, and one of the moms comes up, butts in front of me while I'm writing out my check, and tells the book keeper lady that she just can't afford to pay the $30 fee so she hopes they will take care of it for her, all while rubbing her clearly pregnant belly. I could've screamed.

DSculley1824 · August 2014

Okayyy I am SO glad I'm not the only one. First off, my SIL and BIL and my DH family went out to dinner for my MIL birthday. Well my SIL and BIL gave her a birthday card. When she opened it the front had a baby buggy and said "Happy birthday Grandma" ..... My heart sank. I was so heartbroken and felt like the worst person ever. I'm happy to become an aunt but super jealous because I want that!

Also, a girl at work who I've been talking is 8 weeks pregnant. We were doing our cycles together and sharing experiences when she told me she was gonna start TTC and she knew I was too. She got a BFP on her 2nd cycle. She told me that she's super nauseas. I said I wish I was. And she said no you don't. (Btw I would kill to be nauseas bc that means I would be pregnant!)

Lastly, last night I was browsing Facebook and boom my friend from high school put up a pregnancy announcement. She's pregnant with TWINS! Anddddd her son is only 6 months old. My god. She joked about being too fertile. Knife to the heart.

shirleymaeby · August 2014

Okay, this is obviously a little late but I just heard about and HAVE to get it out.

There's this guy at work whose wife was pregnant but he never said anything about it and his teammates found out about it on FB. So they all congratulate him and he gets annoyed that they even found out. So his wife gives birth last week and not only did he not take the day off (he ran to the hospital at lunch and then came back to the office) but he hasn't and doesn't plan to take any time off for paternity leave. AND his wife is in a doctoral program in another state so they only see each other on the weekends right now. So he is sending the baby to live with his parents about 7 hours away for the next 9 months while she finishes her program. He says he'll go down every weekend but something tells me he will not.

What. The. Fuck.

theholmanherd · August 2014

kmdecoux said:

Okay, this is obviously a little late but I just heard about and HAVE to get it out.

There's this guy at work whose wife was pregnant but he never said anything about it and his teammates found out about it on FB. So they all congratulate him and he gets annoyed that they even found out. So his wife gives birth last week and not only did he not take the day off (he ran to the hospital at lunch and then came back to the office) but he hasn't and doesn't plan to take any time off for paternity leave. AND his wife is in a doctoral program in another state so they only see each other on the weekends right now. So he is sending the baby to live with his parents about 7 hours away for the next 9 months while she finishes her program. He says he'll go down every weekend but something tells me he will not.

What. The. Fuck.

I cannot understand people like this, like it's a fucking inconvenience. It's a life, people! Your fucking DNA wrapped up in an adorable baby. Who the fuck is so blase about it?

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