TTC After a Loss

**** Monday Crazy Train *****

This is a thread posted daily for any of us who need to get out our frustrations about waiting to O, the 2WW, or vent about our cycles. If you find yourself checking FF obsessively, MF is getting the best of you, or you just want to pee on all things, let it out here!

In order for the conductors to be better able to help you, please make sure you either have a FF chart link in your sig, or make sure you post a link. Don't chart? You should consider it, not only will it give you a lot more insight to your cycles, but conductors will be able to answer a lot of your questions just by looking at your chart! To learn more about charting, check out the charting course that FF offers:https://www.fertilityfriend.com/courses/

The CT is not the place to post a BFP. If you have a "squinter" or if you have a line that appeared after the time frame, please do not post about it here. Take a step back from the board, test again with FMU, and good luck!

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Crazy level from 1-10:

CD/DPO:

Can I just ______ already?!:

Signs/Symptoms:

Explain your Crazy here:

Re: **** Monday Crazy Train *****

  • Crazy level from 1-10: I am totally feeling like an 8 these days.

    CD/DPO: CD 22 / DPO 9 if going off +OPK since my chart doesn't make any sense to me.

    Can I just ______ already?!: getting a fucking period already

    Signs/Symptoms: everything is a symptom anymore. I'm that crazy!!!

    Explain your Crazy here: random but last night I experienced (not the first time) intense uterus cramping. We're taking the ultimate uterus charley horse. Typically the constant cramp last about an hour and comes with chills, nausea, occasional vomiting, and that wonderful hunched over crouching tiger position. This has happened 6 times now in almost two years and when I've brought up to my OB she didn't seem concerned. Said that it's typically related to a rupture cyst (which my last ultrasound showed on my right ovary). Bleeding always starts with in 24 hours from the episode, however I usually experience this when I'm ovulating. Also post sex. No sex last night so this caught me off guard at 1 am.

    I know this isn't exactly the place but anyone ever experience something like this? I'm feeling pretty psycho these days.

    DH & I are both 28    Together: 12 years    Married: 09/24/2011

    BFP#1: January '12 - DD1 09/16/2012

    Preterm labor 31 weeks. Monitored for Hellp and diagnosed with oligohydramnios July '12

    BFP #2: 06/25 - EDD 03/05/15 MMC confirmed 8/1 - D&E 8/4 retained tissue discovered 8/20

    BFP #3 11/24 - 12/15 Heartbeat detected - DD2 07/29/15

  • Loading the player...
  • Crazy level from 1-10: 6

    CD/DPO: CD31/10DPO

    Can I just ______ already?!:be done with this cycle already

    Signs/Symptoms: nothing.

    Explain your Crazy here: Huge temp drop today at 10 DPO. My LP is usually 13 days long so this seems early for me, but I'm bracing for the arrival of AF any time following that temp nose dive. I suppose it's to optimistic to think it's an "implantation dip". I just want this cycle done. I'm having a hard time and debating if I even want to keep trying for another as the stress of it is just too much. Maybe I should just be done. I think next cycle I'm going back on some sort of birth control while I figure out what the hell I want.

    BFP 3/30/13, MMC and D&C 4/19/13
    BFP 4/8/14, MMC 5/5/14, D&C 5/9/14
    BFP 8/26/14 Due date 5/8/15

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Back on the train again today. I posted this yesterday, but since then AF has full-on arrived, so I need to post again.

    Crazy level from 1-10: 8

    CD/DPO: Maybe CD15, maybe CD1. Who knows? Hence, my crazy.

    Can't *my ute and hormones stop jerking me around* already?!: 

    Signs/Symptoms: see below

    Explain your Crazy here: The latest in my ongoing saga called MY CONFUSED UTE: I have full-on AF right now, despite the high estrogen dosage I've been taking since my surgery 2 weeks ago. This is when I would normally expect AF. But I thought the course of prescribed hormones was supposed to fake out my cycle and I wasn't supposed to bleed until after I'm done with the pills, which isn't for another 10 days!? I just sent a message to my RE asking if I should continue the hormones or just count this as day 1 and get on with things. We'll see what he says. If he wants me to continue, it means I'll probably have YET ANOTHER AF in 2 weeks. Sigh. 

    image
    image
    DX: I'm a Recurrent Loser
    Me (35) + DH (37) - Married Sept. 2007
    BFP #1 - DS born 7/11/11
    BFP#2 11/13/13 - EDD 7/29/14 - M/C at 5w3d
    BFP #3 12/28/13 - EDD 9/7/14 - M/C at 4w6d
    BFP#4 3/27/14 -  EDD 12/5/14 - Girl lost to 45X at 8w6d - D&C 
    BFP#5 10/15/14 - EDD 6/30/15 - M/C at 7w2d
    BFP #6 1/5/15 - EDD 9.16.14 [CLICKY for progress]
    In search of a image


  • Another ride on the crazy train for me b-(

    Crazy level from 1-10:10

    CD/DPO:34/13

    Can I just ______ already?!:Get this cycle over with and get AF

    Signs/Symptoms: everything!!!

    Explain your Crazy here: Temp keeps dropping, so I am now just waiting for AF. I have been such a crabby mess that I just need this cycle to be over with already.



    Hugs to anyone who needs them today!!!


    Yelena + Rubere Married: 05/13/2011
    TTC since 2012
    BFP#1EDD: 06/21/2014  ~  TFMR --Holoprosencephaly 
    Said goodbye on 2/10/2014 at 21 weeks. We miss our baby girl "J"
    My Chart image
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    image
    imageimage
    imageimageimage      
  • @jennadesigns --- I am feeling the same way you are. Hugs!!!!!!


    @uromys -- No experience or advice. I would recommend speaking to your doctor since that pain does not sound like fun. Hugs to you!
    Yelena + Rubere Married: 05/13/2011
    TTC since 2012
    BFP#1EDD: 06/21/2014  ~  TFMR --Holoprosencephaly 
    Said goodbye on 2/10/2014 at 21 weeks. We miss our baby girl "J"
    My Chart image
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    image
    imageimage
    imageimageimage      
  • uromys said:
    Crazy level from 1-10: I am totally feeling like an 8 these days. CD/DPO: CD 22 / DPO 9 if going off +OPK since my chart doesn't make any sense to me. Can I just ______ already?!: getting a fucking period already Signs/Symptoms: everything is a symptom anymore. I'm that crazy!!! Explain your Crazy here: random but last night I experienced (not the first time) intense uterus cramping. We're taking the ultimate uterus charley horse. Typically the constant cramp last about an hour and comes with chills, nausea, occasional vomiting, and that wonderful hunched over crouching tiger position. This has happened 6 times now in almost two years and when I've brought up to my OB she didn't seem concerned. Said that it's typically related to a rupture cyst (which my last ultrasound showed on my right ovary). Bleeding always starts with in 24 hours from the episode, however I usually experience this when I'm ovulating. Also post sex. No sex last night so this caught me off guard at 1 am. I know this isn't exactly the place but anyone ever experience something like this? I'm feeling pretty psycho these days.
    I'm so sorry you're dealing with that. :( FX you can find a doctor who will look into it. I wish I had more advice but I really don't :(:(
  • Crazy level from 1-10: 6

    CD/DPO: CD31/10DPO

    Can I just ______ already?!:be done with this cycle already

    Signs/Symptoms: nothing.

    Explain your Crazy here: Huge temp drop today at 10 DPO. My LP is usually 13 days long so this seems early for me, but I'm bracing for the arrival of AF any time following that temp nose dive. I suppose it's to optimistic to think it's an "implantation dip". I just want this cycle done. I'm having a hard time and debating if I even want to keep trying for another as the stress of it is just too much. Maybe I should just be done. I think next cycle I'm going back on some sort of birth control while I figure out what the hell I want.

    If TTA for a few cycles will help you gain some clarity then that's absolutely what you need to do. TTCAL is a mindfuck. It plays with our emotions and leaves us feeling so so empty. Take care of yourself.

  • Back on the train again today. I posted this yesterday, but since then AF has full-on arrived, so I need to post again.

    Crazy level from 1-10: 8

    CD/DPO: Maybe CD15, maybe CD1. Who knows? Hence, my crazy.

    Can't *my ute and hormones stop jerking me around* already?!: 

    Signs/Symptoms: see below

    Explain your Crazy here: The latest in my ongoing saga called MY CONFUSED UTE: I have full-on AF right now, despite the high estrogen dosage I've been taking since my surgery 2 weeks ago. This is when I would normally expect AF. But I thought the course of prescribed hormones was supposed to fake out my cycle and I wasn't supposed to bleed until after I'm done with the pills, which isn't for another 10 days!? I just sent a message to my RE asking if I should continue the hormones or just count this as day 1 and get on with things. We'll see what he says. If he wants me to continue, it means I'll probably have YET ANOTHER AF in 2 weeks. Sigh. 

    GAH!

    I think this happened to jlworden too. If I'm not mistaken she called her doc and her doc told her to stop her meds.

    FX your doctor gets in touch with you soon!
  • Another ride on the crazy train for me b-(

    Crazy level from 1-10:10

    CD/DPO:34/13

    Can I just ______ already?!:Get this cycle over with and get AF

    Signs/Symptoms: everything!!!

    Explain your Crazy here: Temp keeps dropping, so I am now just waiting for AF. I have been such a crabby mess that I just need this cycle to be over with already.



    Hugs to anyone who needs them today!!!


    FX for some answers one way or another soon. TWW suck :(
  • Back on the train again today. I posted this yesterday, but since then AF has full-on arrived, so I need to post again.

    Crazy level from 1-10: 8

    CD/DPO: Maybe CD15, maybe CD1. Who knows? Hence, my crazy.

    Can't *my ute and hormones stop jerking me around* already?!: 

    Signs/Symptoms: see below

    Explain your Crazy here: The latest in my ongoing saga called MY CONFUSED UTE: I have full-on AF right now, despite the high estrogen dosage I've been taking since my surgery 2 weeks ago. This is when I would normally expect AF. But I thought the course of prescribed hormones was supposed to fake out my cycle and I wasn't supposed to bleed until after I'm done with the pills, which isn't for another 10 days!? I just sent a message to my RE asking if I should continue the hormones or just count this as day 1 and get on with things. We'll see what he says. If he wants me to continue, it means I'll probably have YET ANOTHER AF in 2 weeks. Sigh. 

    GAH!

    I think this happened to jlworden too. If I'm not mistaken she called her doc and her doc told her to stop her meds.

    FX your doctor gets in touch with you soon!
    Thank you @pinkcamino! I thought you might have some insight.

    PS: I'm working on my blog post and hope to get it to you this week.
    image
    image
    DX: I'm a Recurrent Loser
    Me (35) + DH (37) - Married Sept. 2007
    BFP #1 - DS born 7/11/11
    BFP#2 11/13/13 - EDD 7/29/14 - M/C at 5w3d
    BFP #3 12/28/13 - EDD 9/7/14 - M/C at 4w6d
    BFP#4 3/27/14 -  EDD 12/5/14 - Girl lost to 45X at 8w6d - D&C 
    BFP#5 10/15/14 - EDD 6/30/15 - M/C at 7w2d
    BFP #6 1/5/15 - EDD 9.16.14 [CLICKY for progress]
    In search of a image



  • @uromys Sorry you're going through that!  I had a close friend who had issues with cysts rupturing, unfortunately for her it turned into multiple hospital visits and surgery to remove the cysts.  I don't mean to scare you, but from everything I've learned from her it seems pretty serious if it keeps happening.  I would definitely place a call to your doctor to let them know what you're experiencing.  If she isn't taking your concerns seriously, I would probably want to see a different doctor.
    I have a friend who when I explained these episodes to said that its sounds like the same thing she experiences when she has a ruptured cyst. She was diagnosed with endometriosis five years ago. I'll be bringing it up to my doctor today. I do have a new practice lined up for when I finish out the process I've got going with my current.

    DH & I are both 28    Together: 12 years    Married: 09/24/2011

    BFP#1: January '12 - DD1 09/16/2012

    Preterm labor 31 weeks. Monitored for Hellp and diagnosed with oligohydramnios July '12

    BFP #2: 06/25 - EDD 03/05/15 MMC confirmed 8/1 - D&E 8/4 retained tissue discovered 8/20

    BFP #3 11/24 - 12/15 Heartbeat detected - DD2 07/29/15

  • @uromys Sorry you're going through that.  Hope you get some answers soon.  

    @kittymeowbark Hope AF comes for you soon

    AFM

    Crazy level from 1-10: 8 (only an 8 since my DH is off work today, it would be a 10 if I was by myself!!)

    CD/DPO: CD 23/DPO 9

    Can I just ______ already?!: Get a BFP

    Signs/Symptoms: A few but I'm reading into everything so I don't know if any are reliable.  Tender bbs (for a week now) some twinges etc.  Yesterday I got out of my car and felt an intense pulling sensation on my lower right side.  *This is the symptom I'm reading into* I had a hernia repair there about 3 years ago, so at first I thought oh crap I reopened the incision, but then I was like what if it's a pg symptom?? I know.  Crazy.  I prob got out a weird way and pulled right there where that incision was and that's why it hurt.  UGH I just want to know!! Testing on Wed.  

    Explain your Crazy here: *See above*



    Ashleigh (26) and Darren (26)
    Married 8-10-13
    TTC since February 2014
    BFP #1 4-22-14  EDD 1-1-15
    8w u/s 5-22-14 Baby measuring 6w1d. Heartbeat detected
    Went to Dr. 5-30-14 due to bleeding. Prescribed progesterone
    Went to ER 6-1-14 2:30 AM - diagnosed with incomplete m/c
    6-6-14 natural m/c completed
    10-24-14 BFP #2 EDD 7-6-15 **Please** be our Rainbo

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersImage and video hosting by TinyPic
                                                                    BabyFruit TickerBabyFetus Ticker
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  • @uromys Sorry you're going through that.  Hope you get some answers soon.  

    @kittymeowbark Hope AF comes for you soon

    AFM

    Crazy level from 1-10: 8 (only an 8 since my DH is off work today, it would be a 10 if I was by myself!!)

    CD/DPO: CD 23/DPO 9

    Can I just ______ already?!: Get a BFP

    Signs/Symptoms: A few but I'm reading into everything so I don't know if any are reliable.  Tender bbs (for a week now) some twinges etc.  Yesterday I got out of my car and felt an intense pulling sensation on my lower right side.  *This is the symptom I'm reading into* I had a hernia repair there about 3 years ago, so at first I thought oh crap I reopened the incision, but then I was like what if it's a pg symptom?? I know.  Crazy.  I prob got out a weird way and pulled right there where that incision was and that's why it hurt.  UGH I just want to know!! Testing on Wed.  

    Explain your Crazy here: *See above*


    FX for you! Hopefully the next few days will be kind to you!
  • HI PC! Thanks for conducting today...I'll be "all aboard" pretty much every day this week...chugga chugga choo choo

    Crazy level from 1-10:5

    CD/DPO: 24/7

    Can I just ______ already?!: stop reading into every tenth of a degree my temperature changes

    Signs/Symptoms: slightly tender boobs, emotional, on & off mild crampy (sounds a lot like AF, huh?)

    Explain your Crazy here: I know I need to chill the F out over my chart but I keep staring at it and looking back at last month's TTA chart, then the one before that when I got a BFP (loss) and trying to analyze the crap out of it. My post O temps are way lower this cycle than normal. I seriously just need it to be Saturday so I can test/get AF. (oh and to add to my crazy brain- I would consider testing Friday at 11DPO, but I tested at 11DPO the cycle I had my loss so my brain says testing at 11DPO is bad luck for me....WTF is wrong with me?)


    image
    DS1 born 4/17/11
    DS2 born 2/22/13
    MMC 5/16/14@8w2d
    DD due 5/9/15 Please be our
    RAINBOW


    imageimage
  • mpiemont said:
    HI PC! Thanks for conducting today...I'll be "all aboard" pretty much every day this week...chugga chugga choo choo

    Crazy level from 1-10:5

    CD/DPO: 24/7

    Can I just ______ already?!: stop reading into every tenth of a degree my temperature changes

    Signs/Symptoms: slightly tender boobs, emotional, on & off mild crampy (sounds a lot like AF, huh?)

    Explain your Crazy here: I know I need to chill the F out over my chart but I keep staring at it and looking back at last month's TTA chart, then the one before that when I got a BFP (loss) and trying to analyze the crap out of it. My post O temps are way lower this cycle than normal. I seriously just need it to be Saturday so I can test/get AF. (oh and to add to my crazy brain- I would consider testing Friday at 11DPO, but I tested at 11DPO the cycle I had my loss so my brain says testing at 11DPO is bad luck for me....WTF is wrong with me?)


    I wish I had some words of advice for you but the truth is I do the exact same thing. Try and not analyze your charts too much. They change from cycle to cycle and you can't necessarily read too much into them. FX the next few days are kind to you.
  • @Greeneyes842‌ took a peek at your chart. Looks like we started CD1 on the same day. Good luck this month!!
    Pregnancy Ticker

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    BFP #1 12/23/13 MMC 01/24/14 @ 9w5days

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

     

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