speculum issues... and weight rant

runningmama22 · August 2014

Hi ladies,

I have mostly lurked as of late.. used to have a different username but had to change it due to searchability issues. Anyway, today I had an appointment. I'm 27 weeks and 3 days, and I have been having discharge, so they checked me and had to use the speculum. I have NEVER felt such immense pain in my life - literally a 20 out of 10 - and now I'm terrified about labor. I cannot even describe the pain other than to say it felt like shards of glass were inside of me, that's how horrible it burned and stung. No infections or anything, so I really have no idea why it hurt like it did. Has anyone had a similar experience? The resident who did it was getting mad at me for crying, and generally made me feel like a freak.

Also... I'm struggling with my weight gain. I have already gained 27 lbs at 27 weeks, and am so scared it will take forever to come off. I was super active before getting pregnant (I was about 100 lbs and worked out 6 days a week, high intensity interval training and MMA) and the weight gain has been so hard for me to cope with. I eat pretty healthy most days - I eat about 300 extra calories a day (some days more) than my maintenance before... but I guess it's coming on fast because I don't exercise like I used to. I still box (non-contact at this point) 3 days a week and try to walk and do weights at least 3 times a week, but I guess it's not enough... I know it's vain and stupid, but I'm just scared I will get stuck at some unhappy weight for me. And I'm short, so it all counts.

Sorry, I am mostly ranting and looking for advice from people who have experienced either of these issues... today has been so stressful, and I know all that REALLY matters is baby girl and that she's growing healthy (which she is, thankfully).

Justabean3 · August 2014

Them checking you can hurt. They check you about a million times when in labor and have no problems thinking their arm goes in there too..

BUT really you get used to it, sometimes it is painful and sometimes it doesn't hardly hurt at all.

As for the weight I totally understand. I am 5'2 (100-105 pp) and with my first baby I gained 50. It was all off by 9 or 10 months but all of it but 10 pounds came off in the first 3-5 months. I didn't diet or excerise.

with baby 2 and probably this one I will gain around 25-28 and with #2 it was off by 10 weeks (I breastfed). I didn't with the first.

Seriously you don't care after baby comes. I mean it might cross your mind but it isn't an overwhelming concern anymore. Sleep, feeding baby, showering and all the basics become your lifeline

runningmama22 · August 2014

Thanks ladies. @justabean3, in your experience, do those painful exams mean I'm going to "have to be knocked out for birth" (exact words of a nurse at my OB's office)? I plan to get an epidural now, just because of these exams and the pain it has caused. But "knocked out"?? I don't know. The nurse made me feel like a freak, and the resident who examined me first before the doctor also made me feel like a weirdo for having such a horrible pain tolerance. She literally left the room to get the doctor because I was complaining it hurt.

I'm totally discouraged now about everything. You're like my height/weight twin.. I am hoping I can get the weight off by 6 months - I'm like on track to gain 40 right now, but my parents already planned a Florida vacation for the time she's 6 months old - I am really hoping I don't feel so bad about myself I choose to stay out of pictures. Ugh, maybe I'm hormonal, but this is a rough week.

@crawford411, thank you for the advice.. I will try exhaling next time. I understand what you're saying... It's funny, NONE of my doctors or nurses have said anything about breathing, and at least 6 different people have seen me in pain from either speculum exams (to check for bleeding bc I've had odd spotting off and on, coming from my perenial area actually I just discovered with a mirror and some contortion) or cervical checks (due to complaining about cramping)... you'd think someone would actually care enough to suggest a management technique like breathing. Thank you. I hope you have an easy labor and delivery and it's not too painful!! I am quite worried.

Thanks again

crunchymamaof2 · August 2014

I used to have severe pain, I think they called in vaginismus. Basically the muscles in your vagina involuntarily tense causing the pain. Add tense muscles to an already sensitive cervix and exams can hurt like hell. The breathing techniques suggested above are great. Teaching your body to relax will be a huge help.

As for childbirth, well, it hurts. But it's a much different pain than a pelvic exam. My first labor was super painful due to my waters breakin before contractions and I got an epidural, the epidural does help but you can still feel pressure even if it works perfectly. My second labor was insanely quick and without medication. It hurt like crazy but it was over so fast I prefer this way. Breathing and relaxing was a huge help that time and what I should have done the first time. You will get through labor and you'll be amazed at what your body just did. Don't fear it.

And btw, the doctors and nurses you saw sound like complete assholes. Don't listen to their asinine comments,

RayRay007 · August 2014

I'm sorry you had such a painful exam. I don't have much experience with labour, but you might want to do some learning about the physiology of labour and coping techniques.

Justabean3 · August 2014

No I don't think they will have to "knock you out" they only do that for extreme cases like C-section and the epi didn't take or you are having another serious complication.

Labor isn't fun but pain is just part of it. It really isn't so scary once you are there and in the moment. I ended up with an emergency c-section after induction past my edd, cord wrapped 2x around neck and once around his torso. He got stuck.

Never knocked me out AND I would do it all over again the same way if I had too. Every experience is so different. There is not one person who can tell you how it will go for you specifically.

caballablanca · August 2014

My hospital offered birthing classes. I would recommend one that goes over all the options for pain management. They can teach you some ways to cope with pain while you are at home and before getting any drugs (if you plan to go that route). For the record, I always thought internal checks hurt like hell. Those nurses sound like total bitches. You're gonna do fine!

serenbach · August 2014

I found it horrific, the doctor who did it to me recently used a minimum amount of KY jelly (which was freezing) and just popped it up there which was so uncomfortable, after she left I stood up and there was blood everywhere which freaked me out as I hadn't seen blood come from there in 6 months. I ended up having to stay overnight in hospital for monitoring all because she was so rough with me. Try not to stress about labour, your body adjusts and widens naturally, my body tightened at the cold horrible speculum which made it worse!

js1002 · August 2014

I remember the first time they checked my cervix with my first pregnancy, I thought I was going to die. It was an unexpected appointment, so my husband was in the room with me, and I squeezed his hand so hard that I nearly broke it, and he said the look on my face was unlike anythnig he has ever seen.

By the time I got to labor, it was totally no big deal. I actually ended up with a c section after a very long labor, which is a long story, but my point is -- the checks they did at that point didn't bother me, and the epidural did a great job of managing my pain. I got an epidural at 6 cm, and laboring before that point wasn't terribly painful.

This pregnancy, i had my first cervical check two weeks ago and it was totally no big deal. Like, I was prepared for it to be horrible and it just wasn't. So I think you might get a little more used to it now that you know what to expect! Try to take some tylenol before your appointments to help with any pain, and make sure you are very well hydrated.

As for the weight... plus sized mama here, gained 30 with my last pregnancy and lost 50... have gained about 15 so far this time... everybody is different but weight loss is possible if you are determined and discplined when you need to be!

Goldilocks1984 · September 2014

Totally I yelped and bawled because it was so terribly painful, especially during the colposcopy. I had them get the head OB dr and had the same results with her. Thank goodness the colposcopy came up negative and what the Dr and I thought was infection discharge was also normal. She said the pain was during to the increase in blood flow to the area. Idk. I thought I was the only one with these issues. I've even looked into getting a different OB due to the pain, thinking they were heavy handed. I'm sorry you had this issue but relieved that it's not just me. I too am now more afraid of delivery pain, but hopefully it will all work itself out... what else can we do? All I can say is if it is terrible, then I'm a one and done mommy.

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