December Angels Check-In 8/20

blackbird818 · August 2014

This check-in is for all mommas who lost a baby due in the month of December (any year), including any late loss mommies who gave birth and lost their babes in the month of December.

NEW POSTERS: Welcome. I'm so very sorry you are here, but I do hope you find all the love and support you need. Tell us a little about yourself, where you are in the TTCAL process, and don't forget to include your EDD or birth date, loss date, sex if you knew it and any names you had chosen.

CURRENT MEMBERS: Let me know of any updates to the information below. I only include personal messages to those ladies who participated last week. If you missed last week, please feel free to let us know what is going on with you. Please PM me with news of BFPs

Please note, if I am unable to make the regular check-in date, I will do the check-in the very following day, if possible.

***Housekeeping - I trimmed down "The List" to include only the ladies that have participated over the past few weeks. If I deleted anyone in error, please let me know, and I will add them back.

THE LIST:

jbasore1123 : 12/17/13

kistyW13 : 12/12/13

blackbird818 : 12/10/13

ky29 : 12/04/13

medic7979 : 12/15/14

Lesliem0901 : 12/07/14

O2Girl : 12/5/14

lyndz333 : 12/6/14

mrsjg2013 : 12/25/14

StephieMK : 12/01/14

MSU_Girl1202 : 12/07/13 , 12/02/14

ZoeyH14 : 12/02/14 Caleb

mflowers929 : 12/19/14

jjbmstinco : 12/29/14

Anselser : 12/30/14

jennadesigns : 12/19/14

PinkCamino : 12/28/13

@ky29 - I hope everything turned out ok with your family. How did IVF class go on Monday? How was moving your bro yesterday? Did you talk to YH about the herbal snuff?

@kistyw13 - (((HUGS))) for the BFN this morning!!

@Lesliem0901 - I see you had a great scan & b/w on Monday. Yay!! FX for an ER next week!!! Grow follies grow!!

@jennadesigns - How's the 2ww going lady?

@medic7979 -Thumbs up on the charting!! You're doing great! GL on not getting OCD about it lol!!! (I know I am ) FX for O soon!!!

@mflowers929 -Hope YH is feeling better (and less clingy )!!

@O2Girl - Biggest (((HUGS))) lady. I hope you're doing better after the additional stress you've been through. I know you're going to being so caught up in the 'what ifs' until transfer time. Keeping everything crossed for you and hoping time flies til October 3rd!! Much love sweetie!!

@jjbmstinco - How's school going? How are you feeling in the 2ww? Did you guys have good timing?

@StephieMK – How are you doing sweetie?

@MSU_Girl1202 - Just hanging out on BCP. How are you feeling love? Any fun plans this weekend?

@Anselser - Hope you're emotionally hanging in there, and it gets easier at work over time. (((Hugs))) I say do something for yourself this weekend as a "reward".

@lyndz333 - How did your appt go Friday?

@mrsjg2013 - Happy first day of school (with students)!! I hope being back in a routine helps you in your healing process. How are you doing? Any signs of AF yet?

Question of the Day: Who is your favorite Care Bear?

((((not totally random/unrelated.....notice the rainbow))))

MSU_Girl1202 · August 2014

@blackbird81‌8: Thanks for running the check in! How was your week? Adjusted back to real life after vacay yet?

@kristyw13: big ((hugs)) lady. BFN suck :-(

As for me, yep, just hanging out of bcps...I know it was for the best that I waited a cycle to do fet, but I'm just so inpatient about it now! This weekend DH is coming down to the new place and there's supposed to be some sort of art and music festival here that were gonna check out, so that should be fun!

blackbird818 · August 2014

@kistyW13 As much as we try no to get our hopes up, it's so hard not to....especially in that 3 minute window waiting for results. Much love lady!!! (((HUGS))) I want it for you so badly!! TP to your dreams for messing with you...what a mindfuck (literally)!!! I have had those too and woken up & just wanted to cry bc it wasn't real.

@MSU_Girl1202 I would be impatient too. Sending you lots of patient vibes! Hope you & YH have fun at the festival this weekend! Try to keep busy and FET will be here before you know it! Just remember you are trying to give your body & little embies the best possible chance!

@medic7979 lol no worries...I check it constantly too either my chart or more often my Friends List

StephieMK · August 2014

@blackbird818‌ Thanks for checking in! How is the adoption research going?

@kistyW13‌ (((hugs))) for the BFN and the dreams. I find myself not wanting to wake up when I have those either.

@MSU_Girl1202‌ Enjoy your weekend!

@medic7979‌ FX for O soon!

Others' pregnancies mentioned.....

AFM, still sticking with the healthier lifestyle so far. I've only lost 1.5 lbs but I guess it's better to be going down than up.

So last week I was supposed to go shopping for a baby shower gift with two other friends. I was having an especially rough day with the whole baby thing so I passed on it. (The friend's due date is about a week before mine). DH just spoke with them last night, and we found out its a good chance that the baby will be born mentally handicapped. Now I feel terrible for feeling the way I did last week.

My sister is due the end of September and has asked me to be in the delivery room. I'm excited that I'll be one of the first ones to meet my nephew, but also worried my sad-for-myself why-not-me feelings might come through.

QOTW: I had a Love-A-Lot bear as a child. Now I'd have to say Wish bear because I'm wishing, hoping, and praying for a baby. Or like @kistyW13‌ said, Cheer bear because of the rainbow!

blackbird818 · August 2014

AFM: Back at in the "real world". As you may have seen, my 2nd anniversary was Monday. H & I had a great anniv. weekend filled with lots of quality time. I cooked a romantic dinner Sat. night and we sipped on a vintage bottle of wine (11yrs old) that I purchased in Italy in 2005. I decided what better occasion lol (plus I was tired of waiting for a reason to drink it). Then we spent all day Sunday driving all over the state looking at calves and visiting with friends. Great times!! On the way home, H took me to get sushi. Monday we exchanged cards and snuggled.
Nothing else too exciting...we are waiting with breathe that is baited for calving season to start :!! :-SS this includes checking cows morning & night and staring at udders and vulvas constantly 8-> trying to figure out how close they are to calving. Farm life...what can I say lol.

TTCALR.....so I'm curious to see what is going on with my temp rise today (although I always warn you shouldn't over-analyze 1 temp..."do as I say, not as I do"). I have been having some CM the last couple of days, which is rare for me. But being as it is rare, I'm not the best judge of CM so I don't usually enter it in my chart. Time will tell. I tried to DTD last night but H was exhausted so no go. :-?? oh well

QOTD: I love Grumpy Bear. He was always my favorite; I had the stuffed bear as a child.

PS @kistyW13 the bear with the rainbow belly is Cheer Bear

Here's a list of the Care Bears for reference. I loved the Care Bears growing up!!

Lesliem0901 · August 2014

Hi lovelies.

@blackbird818‌ - Thanks for the check-in! Hope you're doing well and adjusting to "real" life again.

@kistyW13‌ - Big hugs for the BFN...it just sucks

@MSU_Girl1202‌ - Enjoy the time with your DH

@medic7979‌ - Oh, the joys of FF chart over analysis...been there many times.

@StephieMK - I'm so sorry to hear about your friend...don't beat yourself up about those thoughts; we've all had them.

AFM. So, I was super excited on Monday, and today not so much. My estrogen level has dropped to 108 and I still only have 10 follies.

I am hoping for a miracle that things will turn around on Friday.

QOTD: Cheer Bear for sure! I love pink and rainbows.

blackbird818 · August 2014

@Lesliem0901 (((HUGS))) hoping for better news on Friday

@StephieMK Great job sticking to a healthier lifestyle!! It can take a little time for your body to adjust and get with the program. Keep it up!! My T&Ps are with your friends. There was no way you could have known this; please don't beat yourself up. (((Hugs)))

How incredible to be there for your sister in the delivery room!! That's a beautiful thing to share with her. I'm sure in the moment you will be so overcome with love & joy for your sister and new nephew....how could you not. You may have that oh-so-familiar twinge of jealousy (I wouldn't blame you if you did) and that's ok. Try not to worry about it right now. I know you love your sister and are so happy for her!!!

ky29 · August 2014

Hey @blackbird818!

@ky29 - I hope everything turned out ok with your family. How did IVF class go on Monday? How was moving your bro yesterday? Did you talk to YH about the herbal snuff?

So.. long story short - my uncle was murdered. He was somewhat estranged from the family, but it was obviously a shock and no one should have to go through what he did. Luckily, the person was seen on surveillance, and were caught, but now it's going to be a long year or so until we figure out what's going to happen.

The IVF class went well! DH asked questions about the shots, which I appreciated that he was actually paying attention!

Moving in my little bro was good - a little chaotic, but since it's his second year, it was not as rough as last year. Still can't believe he's in college & I always worry about him.

And, we had a chat actually last night about him chewing. But, we've been getting along so well lately, I didn't want to ruin things. We talked a bit, he said he'd 'think about things'... but we will see..

Sorry this is a post and run. Trying to get caught up with work from being off the past few days.. ahhhhh.

blackbird818 · August 2014

@ky29 Oh my. I'm so sorry about your Uncle. How sad. My thought & prayers are with your entire family.

Glad to hear class went well. :-bd

I can understand what you mean about the chewing (they can be moody a-holes trying to quit). H has been fine (mood-wise). His biggest problem is the habit of putting the dip in/having something in his mouth. He says he's gettin' used to it. But it has to be something they are willing to do....otherwise they won't stick with it.

mrsjg2013 · August 2014

@blackbird818- Glad you had a great anniversary weekend!! The wine sounds great... checking cow's vulvas... not so much! MH is a football and wrestling coach, so DTD'ing is always a struggle! He gets home late, eats, then falls asleep on the couch all too often!! @medic7979- My crazy H gets up at 3:30am!! I am soooo not a morning person, but he loves getting things done early.

@StephieMK- My nephew was born this summer. Although I wasn't in the room when he entered the world, I was with the first group to visit. I was soooo worried about getting emotional because it was less than a month after my most recent D&C. It was at the same hospital that I would have delivered at- the last time I had walked through the doors was for my surgery. My stomach was in knots, but I was so overcome with joy at seeing his beautiful little face, I had no tears. Honestly, if I were in any room when a baby was born (even before my losses), I would have cried because it's such a miracle.

@LeslieM0901- FX and t&p's for you!

@MSUGirl1202- Have fun with YH this weekend; sounds like a great time!!

@kistyW13- Big ((HUGS)). I haven't had a baby/pregnancy dream in so long! I was upset about it when they first stopped, but I'm thankful now because I'm in the TTA phase of TTCAL and it's so hard to even think about it b/c I don't know when I'll be able to be hopeful again.

AFM- AF is still MIA I'm avoiding calling the RE like they said to after two weeks (if AF hadn't come). I hope they'll give my body a little longer to get back on track before they'd put me on BCP? So I play the waiting game a bit longer...

QOTD- Care Bears was my FAVORITE show when I was a kid!! My mom said I watched the few VHS movies from our small little movie rental store at least two dozen times! Cheer Bear was my favorite back then

jennadesigns · August 2014

blackbird818 Thanks for the check in! Calving season sounds interesting

I'm glad you got to spend some quality time with YH.

@MSU_Girl1202 Have a great weekend!

@kristyw13 Hugs to you. BFNs are the worst!

@medic7979 I know what it's like to stress over your chart ... I'm a late O'er too, and it sucks. Fingers crossed you O soon!

@StephieMK I'm sorry about your friend's news. You had no way of knowing that when you decided not to go so don't beat yourself up over it. I can understand having mixed feelings about watching your sister give birth. It's such a beautiful thing, but it would be hard to not feel like you're missing out on something too.

@Lesliem0901 FX for good news on Friday! ((Hugs))

@ky29 I'm sorry to hear about your uncle, that's terrible.

AFM, I'm frustrated this cycle. I don't know for certain that I've O'd. FF seems to think so, based on my four days of positive OPKs but I don't have any of the symptoms I usually get right after I O (probably TMI, but I usually get really sensitive nipples the day after I O and they hang around for a few days). Also, my temps aren't up all that much. So I'm not even certain I'm in the 2WW. I'm just frustrated all around. I'm a big planner and when I cannot tell what's going on it drives me crazy. Everyone is welcome to chart stalk me and offer their opinion, cause I honestly don't know what's going on.

QOTD: My favorite Care Bear would have to be the one with the rainbow on it, for obvious reasons.

blackbird818 · August 2014

@mrsjg2013 haha what can I say...that's life on a farm; we don't think anything of it.There are so many things that would get a :-O reactions from you lovelies if I shared them (cow vulvas is a tame one

). But in seriousness we watch the cows for physical signs that they are close to calving to avoid problems. Most of our cows are AI (like IUI) bred so we know their EDD (to put things in TTC terms lol). Plus after we finish AIing we turn out a cleanup bull, H records any dates he sees the bull breeding a cow again so we can have an idea of EDD.

@jennadesigns based off your chart and CM I tend to agree with FF. Cycles/symptoms can change, especially after a loss. You may have a new "normal".
Calving season is really very exciting (at least for us lol) bc there's so many possibilities/so many unknowns and that hope for a "great one". 8-> I don't really know how to explain it or what to liken it to....

mrsjg2013 · August 2014

@jennadesigns- I hear you on the "big planner" front... this whole experience has been a big wake up call to me that I, in fact, have such LITTLE control.

Big ((HUGS)) to you- I wish I had some advice to offer on charting/temping.

@blackbird818- Thanks for the back to school wishes!! It was a good day, other than feeling a bit ill-prepared. (We got one less day to work in our rooms this year.)

ALSO- I thought you would all get a laugh out of my morning surprise today... I realized (once in the bright school bathroom) that you could TOTALLY see my white/black/hot pink zebra striped panties through my khaki pants!!!! AHHHHHH!!!! I double-checked before I left the house (they're a light color and I never really wear them other than our back to school khaki/white day), but apparently the lighting is too dark in my bedroom. WHOOPS!!!!!!!!! Good thing my shirt was long enough to pull down!! My coworker/roommate said she could barely notice, but teaching teenage boys and wardrobe malfunction= bad combo so I played it on the safe side and kept tugging that shirt down!! smh

sorry animated GIF

blackbird818 · August 2014

@mrsjg2013

) ok I admit it....I LOL'd at your panty malfunction

)

we've all had something similar happen.

jjbmstinco · August 2014

Hi girls!

Sorry for the late check in. We had open house tonight. I AM EXHAUSTED. I don't remember being this tired in the past but I feel like I can't keep up the energy. I am sure that once schools gets going, it will be fine. It should be an interesting year. Although, I am so tired of my neighbor already! She is annoying and I personally think she has a personality disorder (legit). I am really excited for the kiddos to come back!

@blackbird818-farmers have such a hard job! I couldn't do half of the things needed to keep animals healthy!

@ky29-I am sorry for your loss. I will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts.

@mrsjg2013-I bet you'll think twice about wearing those pants again! I am glad your shirt was able to cover it.

@jennadesigns-I hear you girl! I hope it gets easier for you!

Lots of hugs girls! Sorry I can't mention everyone. I am falling asleep here.

lyndz333 · August 2014

Hi @blackbird818‌ - Thanks for the check in! Hopefully being back home isn't too much of a kick in the pants after a nice relaxing vacation.

The doctor appointment went well. My OB is really awesome; very reassuring and comforting. She took some blood and called this past Monday to tell me everything is fine so just waiting on AF now. Also got me a real nice basal thermometer so I'm ready to keep charting with hopefully more accurate results, temperate wise. Sorry I'm late to the check in! Yesterday was my first day back at work and date night with the hubby.

blackbird818 · August 2014

@lyndz333 glad to hear your appt went well & your results came back normal. Hopefully AF doesn't drag her feet and keep you waiting! Hope work didn't kick your butt too hard yesterday, and you & YH had a great date night!!! It's so important to make quality time for each other!!

@jjbmstinco hope you get back into the swing of things soon and aren't so exhausted!!

mflowers929 · August 2014

Lol, better-ish? He went back to work on Tuesday, so I have my evenings to myself again. I honestly hadn't realized how much I cherish that hour and a half or so between when he leaves for work and when I go to bed. It's just time for me to unwind and get done what I need to get done, and when I don't have it, I tend to get a bit uptight.

Work has been stressing me out big time. I won't go into any gory details, but lets just say that I scared one of my coworkers. There are very few people who have seen me in a truly black mood, and on Sunday, she saw it. I was basically on the verge of a panic attack all day. Luckily, the other woman working with us is my adopted mom. We moved over from the same company, and she's seen me like this before, so she told me to go home early, when she was supposed to go home, and that she'd stay.

One good thing about H being home though, I have to add, is that we definitely made the most of my O week

I've been starting to feel some things, but I'm not getting my hopes up yet. I'm still a few days shy of AF, so I guess I've officially jumped the crazy train lol

mrsjg2013 · August 2014

Just wanted to be a bit of an AW and share the first good news I've had in 3 weeks... AF is in the house!!!!

Hopefully she is to blame for the emotional roller coaster I've been on for the last week or two and FX that she sheds that retained tissue so I can avoid another d&c!!! Thanks in advance for your t&p's!!!

BLuvsE · August 2014

New here. :'(

Here's my intro.. living child mentioned briefly.

I've been married almost 3 years. Currently a Stay at Home Mom to a 2yo and running our family business from home. Got a BFP on 4/6/14. We weren't trying to avoid really but I also hadn't had AF in two years (PG/BF) so we weren't expecting to conceive. The Saturday before my first OB appointment I woke up to a miscarriage. We called l&d who obviously couldn't do anything. I knew what had happened (there was clearly a baby) so we just waited to go to our appointment the following Wednesday. Miscarriage was confirmed and when we did the ultrasound there was a second baby with no heart beat. I was sent home to naturally miscarry that one. I didn't and ended up with an emergency d&c. So now I'm CD14 of my second cycle since the miscarriage. I have to have 3 before we ttc, but dh still wants to wait until the new year for logistical reasons. I guess I agree but really I just want us both on board

My sister in law got pregnant after miscarrying and our children would have been about a month apart. I was so excited for her and offered to throw her a shower. Then found out I was pregnant too. When we called to tell her (first) she pitched a fit about wanting her baby to be the only baby. Not sure what she meant by that but she got her wish. She still expected a shower out of me, and I am throwing it because even though she's the worst person ever, her daughter will still be my niece. However what was supposed to be an ice cream party for about ten people has become a full on shower (her second kid btw) which she asked me to throw with her mom. Which sucks because (a) you don't throw your own daughter a shower and (b) her mom is also the worst for different reasons.

So my life is full of little pink baby stuff and they seem to have completely forgotten about the three miscarried babies. My two and her one.

Now that's off my chest. Whew. Thanks n

jjbmstinco · August 2014

Welcome @BluvsE. I am sorry for your loss.

mflowers929 · August 2014

So sorry for your loss and the insensitivity you're experiencing @BLuvsE‌ :-(

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