40+ and pregnant with 3rd or more?

shellylovelee · August 2014

I an 40 and ny DH is 45. We have an almost 3yr old DS and an 18mos DD. We are torn whether or not to try for one more. DH has two teenagers from a previous marriage. He is more "done" than I am. Two kids seems kinda "perfect" and fits very neat and tidy in everyday life. Having a third seems soooooo much harder. And we're already exhausted. But I can't seem to shake the desire for one more. I was just curious if any older moms of two or more kids had these thoughts before getting pregnant again. Thanks!

mandyreads · August 2014

I have 3. We tried for #4 before we were told I have PCOS. Dr told me I could keep trying but I had to take meds to help. We decided we didnt want to go thru the trouble since we were content.Then we moved a new dr told me he didn't think I had it. 4 months after going off the pill with the thinking if it happens, it happens, I ended up pregnant at 36. I am actually very happy I was told by my new dr that. Or else we never would have tried again.
Talk with your husband and let him know how you feel. (If you haven't already). You may be surprised.

af2004rn · August 2014

I will be 40 when this baby is born. I am thrilled! I just couldn't get past the ache that someone was missing in our family. We have a 4 and 2 year old. Life will be busy, but I am ready.

WeLiveInMaine · August 2014

I'm 36, 37 when this baby will be born. I have an 11 year old daughter as well. We are hoping to fit at least two babies in but three would be an amazing run of luck. At this point what's a couple more years with kids at home I recon. I mean, with preschoolers and a high schooler in a few years (assuming all goods well) How much difference does the maker over two? I've got built in baby sitting!
If it makes you happy go for it!

NicoleWI · August 2014

I felt VERY much like you do, but I am 39 and DH is 41! We had three already and always thought three would be it, but I felt super, super torn about whether we were really "done." DH was more "done" but also could see that four might be really neat down the line, if we could get through the crazy baby stage again. We were nervous about our age and about opening up the door to risks/heartache after having three good pregnancies. We could not decide and even though my head said we should be done and move on to the next stage, and I was thinking that would be okay, with each month I still found myself hoping I'd accidentally get pregnant. So, when I realized it was my last month to actually have the baby just before forty, we gave it a whirl and I got pregnant. This baby will be born just before I turn 40. Good luck with your decision. It's not an easy call. You just have to try to listen to your heart and think of the long-term.

BabyBliss76 · August 2014

Well I am 37 with 3 children. Will be 38 when I have this one. All I can say was that 3 was going to be it. But pretty much right after I had #3 I feel like I was supposed to have one more...may sound crazy. Most days I thought I was crazy. Lol! Anyway after being done with breastfeeding and getting a couple of other things out of the way. We decided that we would just let if fly if you know what I mean! If it happened then it was meant to be and if not we already have a beautiful family. It happened quick and I feel very lucky. My mom had me at 42 almost 43

I was #5.

MrzStan · August 2014

I have 3. Dd 16, ds 13, ds 9. I will be 40 when number four is due (in april) its going to be strange having a new baby. Im glad all of you are here for support!!

Bigboneded · August 2014

FTM with twins due when I am 42 :-) We will take more if they happen :-)

JilliansMoma · August 2014

I think if you have little ones already that it's almost easy to add one more to the mix. I honestly thought it was harder going from one to two than from two to three. The only time I asked myself "what the hell did we do?" was the first night home from the hospital and we had a crying new born in the middle of the night. But for us the girls all started sleeping large chunks through the night at 8 weeks. We were so lucky that our girls all took so well to sleep. I hope that this LO is just as mellow and a great sleeper as his/her big sisters.

GL in your choice I really think it depends on the temperament of your kids.

JM

edit:spelling

itsmevkb · August 2014

I was 41 when I had my fourth and I'm not going to lie, that pregnancy was harder than any of my others. Adding another child to the mix was perhaps a little easier. I remember our third just fitting right in so that might have been the easiest transition of all of them. Now that I'm pregnant with our fifth and almost 43 I know this is it. Four kids is crazy, five I'm assuming will be almost insane.

Good luck with your decision. My doctor always told me that a woman knows when her family is complete.

shellylovelee · August 2014

So moved by all of your replies! Thank you! Still considering it, and obviously DH has to be in agreement. That dang clock is just SO LOUD!

vintagemom42 · November 2014

I'm pregnant with my 3rd. I knew I was not done... I've always wanted another and I thought that dream was dead.
But here I am! When I least expected it.... I'm terrified.... but immensely happy.

xuxachi · November 2014

I'm the same as you - I have a 3 yo and a 15 mo and am turning 40 this year. I just felt like we weren't done so we decided to go for it and have them all close. Tick tock, right? I'm due in April and have been sick as can be, which hasn't been easy. And slightly freaking out, I won't lie. But here we go...

niknak1208 · November 2014

I'm not 40. I'll be 37 when I deliver this baby which is our third and was not planned. I think my desire for more children comes from my late loss with my pregnancy prior to my daughter. I had a stillborn baby girl at almost 20 weeks in September of 2011. Since then, I just never want to stop. I got pregnant with my daughter who just turned 2.. shortly after my loss. Literally, the moment I delivered her I thought.. ok let's try again! I just think it will never leave me. It's hard. I think this will be out last one.

We felt much like you do.. already exhausted.. 2 is kind of perfect.. there's tables of 4 at restaurants and 2 kids fit in almost all cars and etc etc.. but now that I'm actually pregnant.. we do feel blessed and very excited.

Good luck to you!

ThreeXsaCharm · November 2014

I'm 40'ish and a "seasoned mom" as I call it LOL!! We have two children (5 and 9) we have been trying for three years, naturally (like our other two) then went onto Clomid, Letrozole, IUI's and finally our last shot was IVF retrieving five eggs, three were fertilized and one little bean making it. Who is obviously a fighter like his mama. I am cautiously optimistic and LOVE being pregnant. I knew I wanted another baby hours after giving birth to my son. So elated that we're finally pregnant but really so nervous.

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