Working Moms

How long to adjust?

Hi! I'm a long time lurker, but decided to post since I a am freaking myself out. My DD starts daycare on Tuesday, I am a teacher and go back to work as well. She was in an in-home last school year, but I found a job closer to home and we decided on a center near us too. I have officially started freaking myself out about how she'll adjust, if she will nap, if she will cry all day, etc. She is 18 months old and such a mamas girl since we have been together all summer. In your experience how long does it take kiddos to adjust and adapt to their new routine? Thanks in advance for any advice.

Re: How long to adjust?

  • In my experience, kids adjust super fast. Think about how many kids the preschool has dealt with. They know what they're doing. It will probably be very easy. And if there are issues, it would be impossible for you to predict them. Better to not worry about things, and deal with any issues if they even come up at the time they come up.
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  • I'm right there with you. My 2 year old starts in a few weeks, and I have just absolutely freaked myself out about it. Although I can't seem to follow this advice, I know I need to chill the f out. It's all going to be fine.
  • Our last DC transition was really really hard but in the end, it was fine. Truly.

    My DD was 17mos when we moved across the country and she had to start a brand new daycare right away as we were settling into a new house. She cried at dropoff for four straight weeks, was happy for one, then cried an additional week. Then the switch flipped and she's been fine ever since. After the first week, the DC workers told me she always stopped a few minutes after I left. (Sometimes I'd wait out of sight in the hall and listen, so I know they were telling the truth) DH reported she was always happily playing when he picked her up. Still, it was agonizing.

    The DC director told me that in average, it's probably 3 week for a kid to get comfortable and not cry at dropoff. My girl is cautious and slow to warm up to new people or experiences so she took quite a but longer. I'd say brace yourself for 3 weeks of crying - might be less though - and know that you picked a quality place and she WILL adjust.
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  • When we started DS at daycare at 20 months, he cried for 1 week at drop off and then he suddenly got really happy about going and would run through the halls to get to his class.

    Then of course today after a long weekend with his school being closed to end the summer program and start the fall school year, they had different people helping at the door today and he cried. It still broke my heart, but of course at this point I know he'll be fine once he chooses some activity to do and gets going.




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  • DD started DC at 11 months after spending 24/7 with me since birth. DH does the drop off and said she cried at drop off for less than 2 weeks (and he could hear her stop crying as soon as they rounded the corner). She will however still get upset when I leave in the morning if I don't sneak out. I was surprised when one day this summer I did drop off, I was expecting her to freak out, but she happily went from me to DCP.

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  • It will likely be harder on you than it will them. Kids are very adaptable. Wanted to throw out there that DS has always been in daycare since he was 3 months old. He has gone through phases of crying at drop off and ignoring us from the second we walked in the door. Your LO might adjust in a week and then have anxiety a month from now. I'm learning kids all go through their phases. 

    Enjoy your last day together. I have been wishing all summer that I had become a teacher just to get the time off with DS in the summer. Good luck with the school year!
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  • Thank you all so much for your comments! I'm trying my best not to freak out and deal with issues as they come up. I am definitely enjoying our last day together even though I have had to stop and cry about going back to work! We will adjust!
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