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December 2014 Moms
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Don't name my baby...but....

perfectlove09perfectlove09 member
in December 2014 Moms
So this is sort of a "name post" but not like we usually see.
Looking for input.

I wanted DD's middle name to be Jane, my grandmothers middle name. DH didn't like it at the time and I was so wrapped up in all things baby/pregnancy/labor/delivery that if didn't give much thought to future kids.

DD's name has zero family significance. Now with baby #2 on the way I can't shake the feeling and desire to have a family significance in his/her name. I'm back to wanting Jane for a middle name for a girl or if it's a boy honoring my grandfather by using his last name as "his" middle name (also my mothers maiden name).

My "dilemma" is that I feel guilty naming one child after a family member and not the first. I have siblings...I know how this stuff goes. And in my family it will be made a HUGE deal (of greatness) that baby #2 us honoring my moms side of the family. My point being that everyone will bring it up to baby #2 every time they see him/her. I don't want my DD to feel left out.

Am I being silly?
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Re: Don't name my baby...but....

  • PacoCat33PacoCat33 member
    Maybe in your family this would be a big deal, but in mine I think the reaction would be "isn't that nice" and then everyone moves on. FWIW, my sister named my nephew after my Dad, but her second son, she didn't name after anyone and it was never thought of...

    I don't think  you are being silly, but maybe thinking too much about this. If you like Jane and would like to use it then go for it. 
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  • xc1148xc1148 member
    I'm named after my great grandmother, my bro is named after some random english actor. Never been an issue.
    TTC since June 2011
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    Me: 30, moderate endo, unexplained infertility
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  • bowlwomanbowlwoman member
    My middle name is Jane. I say go for it! :) 
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  • JRod13JRod13 member
    DS is named after my dad and this one isn't going to be named after anyone- no one has said anything thus far and I'm pretty sure no one ever will. I doubt it will be as huge of a deal as you think it will. And even if your family makes a big deal out of it at first, how long could it possibly go on? Surely they won't try to make your DD feel like shit because of what you named her...
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  • krystrist2014krystrist2014 member

    I have thought about this too... so I know what youre feeling. We are naming this baby girl Adriana Gale (my dad's name is Adrian and my Mom's maiden name is Gale). I know for a fact that if we have a boy later on, we will not be naming him after any family because I have a name that Im in love with already and if we have a girl later on, I doubt I will find another family name I like.

    I would say that if this does become an issue between your kids, you should emphasize to your first child that you and her Dad had a very special name that you loved so much you just HAD to name her that. That the name was special to you in a different way. :) I think so long as you let both kids know that their names were picked especially for them, they will not feel bad about it.

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  • AllTheTeaInChinaAllTheTeaInChina member
    I think its weird your family would bring it up every time they see LO #2.  I don't think its that big of a deal.  My younger sister's MN is a family name but my older sister and I never had an issue with it. My grandma and mom don't love her more because they share a name.
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  • Jessie333Jessie333 member
    My middle name and my sisters middle name are family names. My youngest sisters middle name had no family meaning and it has never been an issue.
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  • love2travel2014love2travel2014 member
    My sister named her 3rd child after my mom but none of her other kids are named after anyone. It is never mentioned and as far as I know none of the other siblings 2 older/1 younger even care!
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  • megbmegmegbmeg member
    I think if you feel strongly about a namesake name, then you should do one. DH's little brother is named after their grandad, and he isn't named after anyone, and it hasn't caused any strife at all.

    Maybe you can balance it out later with a different special inheritance for DD - like a blanket grandma made or special photos that she gets to keep?
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  • perfectlove09perfectlove09 member
    Thank you all for your responses. This has really made me feel better about using a namesake. You know if it's not one thing we're worrying about doing wrong it's another ;)

    We will definitely make sure DD knows her name is special be we loved it so much.

    In answer to family bringing it up. I can't tell you how many times I've heard my my grandmother "did you know that you're name is the same as my great aunt..." (I wish you could hear the obnoxious voice...) or "did you know that you were due on my anniversary but you were early and I was so upset that you weren't born on my anniversary" god just thinking of her voice is making me cringe. Oh...I guess I should clarify that this grandmother is from my dad's side lol. I would not be naming baby #2 or 5 or 500 after her or that family. Anyway. Maybe it won't be a big deal.

    I'm really excited for boy or girl bc I have great names picked out to use a family name if it's a boy or girl. And several since we won't name baby till we're holding baby and maybe a day after birth :)

    And the grandpa I want to honor was my most favorite man/person to ever live. Just throwing that out there lol
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    DD#1 December '12
    DD#2 New Year's Baby '15
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