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November 2014 Moms
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Baby shower*little bit of a vent going on here*

huntress17huntress17 member
in November 2014 Moms
So kind of the back story here. I'm the super black sheep of my family. I'm always the last one to know about things and I always get put on the back burner and forgot about in my family :/

Anyways. This is my second baby but my OH first. I still have things from dd but since we are having a boy I have NO boy clothes. I do have a couple unisex things but that's about it. My sisters straight up told me that they weren't having a shower for me. It kinda made me upset a little bit just cause my sister is on her second daughter and we had a shower for her(like I said I'm the black sheep).

I was originally just planning a baby celebration for OH and mine friends to come and have a BBQ, but my BFF got the text from me about me asking for help planning and she straight up told me she was taking over and it was going to be a baby shower. She wants my OH to feel like this baby is just as important as my dd was. I explained it was ok, and she said that since it's his first baby she wants to make sure he gets to go through all the motions of having a baby lol. Needless to say I started crying. I'm so glad to have her in my life.

Sorry if this offends anyone. I just feel like I can somewhat speak my mind on here :).
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Re: Baby shower*little bit of a vent going on here*

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  • huntress17huntress17 member
    Things have worked out now. But both of my sisters have always been like that. They expect the world and don't give anything back. I hardly talk to them cause they just don't talk to me and I try :(
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  • NunyaBennisNunyaBennis member
    mander82 said:

    Is OH the same as DH? I keep trying to figure out what the O stands for.

    It's Monday morning... The only word that comes to my mind right now is "obstinate" but surely that's not right?
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  • LilwatzLilwatz member
    Maelara said:
    huntress17 said:
    Things have worked out now. But both of my sisters have always been like that. They expect the world and don't give anything back. I hardly talk to them cause they just don't talk to me and I try :(
    8-|

    Your sister just had a BABY. The fact that you expect someone that just had a baby to host a shower (which is a gift, not an expectation) is ridiculous and selfish.
    Where I agree with what you are saying, I think the hurt was that in her sister said she shouldn't have one because it's her second kid and had just done it herself.  The hypocrisy.  Not the not doing it.  And that does hurt.  But I don't know.  Wasn't me.  :)

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  • uncharted01uncharted01 member
    mander82 said:
    Is OH the same as DH? I keep trying to figure out what the O stands for.
    My guess is that it mean "other half."
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  • huntress17huntress17 member
    I have 2 sisters, that's the point that truly hurt. My sister that didn't just have a baby straight up told me she wasn't going to do it.

    When I was planning it myself we were just going to do a baby celebration. BBQ, beer(not for me lol just other people in general we would invite), music, friends, fun. That's it. My friends is really close to me and knew my family had thrown a shower for my sisters second. I didn't expect my sister who had just had a LO to do anything I know her family comes first. I didn't mean for it to come across like that. :/
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  • huntress17huntress17 member
    I plan on doing something special for her. I'm sorry if I sound self absorbent or entitled. I'm just saying how I feel cause i don't really have anyone to talk to other than my friend and my OH. Just trying to let off steam. Sorry
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  • huntress17huntress17 member
    It's other half lol.
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  • lizgrace03lizgrace03 member
    Haha I was thinking Other Husband too!


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  • jj0313jj0313 member
    I loathe etiquette.
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  • clumsyatheartclumsyatheart member
    edited August 2014
    I'm really sorry your sister was so insensitive. Think about it this way: there are tons of women who don't have the opportunity, friends, etc for a shower. You're lucky you had one with your first and very lucky a friend is throwing you one now.

    Tbh i don't see the point of showers. They are extra. People are BUYING you shit, and yet there are still so many complaints. I don't have the family or friends for a shower and i wouldnt want one if i did. No one in my family's had one, so that could just be a cultural thing for me. I support you in your family issues, but can't support shower complaints. Sorry if this comes off as rude (it will probs come off as rude because i'm an asshole), but the sheer amount of shower complaints i've read irk me. People don't have to throw a shower, and they sure as hell don't have to buy you anything.

    I'm still really sorry about your family :/ i can see why you would feel resentful and upset.
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  • JPerona0205JPerona0205 member
    I disagree that showers are about motherhood -- I think showers are to celebrate a new baby! I just helped some friends throw a shower for our other friend and it's her third baby, all boys. We were so excited to shower love on the mama of the new boy! But I guess everyone is different.

    I also didn't think that it came across as rude or self-absorbed. I think she was hurt that, after recently doing a second shower for her sister, no one wanted to do one for her. I totally get that. It has nothing to do with etiquette or expecting one or whatever -- it's feeling, yet again, like you do not matter at all to your own sisters.

    I'm super-glad your friend decided to throw one for you, though! I totally think every baby deserves to be celebrated. :)
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  • jj0313jj0313 member
    Haha, I only got through the first two pages but that was gold.
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