IUI #3 = another c/p. Not sure what to do next. :( (BFP/loss warning)

BlueJell0 · August 2014

Hi Ladies,

I know I haven't been a super active poster here recently, but I needed to tell some people who would understand. I got a very faint positive HPT on Thursday. Like the faintest I have ever seen. I went in for bloodwork on Friday and my beta was 17, progesterone was 15. The nurse who left the message said that those were both great numbers!!!!! Yay, you're pregnant, she said!!!! Luckily I'm not completely clueless, this is not my first rodeo, and I knew to be cautiously optimistic. I go back for my second beta tomorrow... but the lines are fainter today. Not even visible on a FRER, barely still there on my Wondfos. I know what this means, this is not my take home baby. Now I am just waiting to bleed, hoping it goes back to zero quickly and isn't ectopic or anything.

I just don't know what to do now. I can't keep doing IUIs and having early m/c's every other time. Statistically I will eventually maybe get lucky, but I can't keep doing this to myself. I have been researching repeat loss testing and it is daunting. I think we are going to get a second opinion, and probably move on to IVF. But will IVF even help me? We can get fertilization to happen (as long as I take lots of hormones and have semi-invasive procedures, that is) but my uterus kills them every single time.

And I don't know why. I am trying to wrap my head around spending $15K+ for a BFN or worse, another m/c.

Anyway, sorry for the novel. Tl;dr: my ute kills babies and I could use a hug. Thanks guys

This board really is the best, I know I haven't given out a whole lot of support lately but I have not been in a good place since my last m/c. I am looking for a grief counselor in my area as one of my next steps. Thanks for reading.

ronniesgirl1981 · August 2014

I am so sorry. This is your 3rd? I know the thought of seeing an RI is daunting (I've been considering it, too). Maybe see an IVF clinic that believes in autoimmune problems? Have you had the repeat loss testing? I agree that I wouldn't spend $15k without investigating the cause. Big hugs to you.

lebradford · August 2014

I don't have any advice, but I'm so, so sorry. No one should have to experience a loss at all, but back-to-back losses are exceptionally cruel. If you ever need to vent, feel free to PM me. ((hugs))

Hollowvic · August 2014

I don't have any advice as my situation is different, but wanted to say sorry for your loss & good luck with whatever you decide.

BlueJell0 · August 2014

Thanks everybody, I really appreciate all of your kind words. I don't have anyone in real life to talk to about this stuff, my H tries but he doesn't know what to say. I do think a treatment break is in order while we figure out what to do, I won't just do another IUI next month.

BlueJell0 · August 2014

ronniesgirl1981 said:

I am so sorry. This is your 3rd? I know the thought of seeing an RI is daunting (I've been considering it, too). Maybe see an IVF clinic that believes in autoimmune problems? Have you had the repeat loss testing? I agree that I wouldn't spend $15k without investigating the cause. Big hugs to you.

@ronniesgirl1981 yes, this is my third. All in less than a year. Thank you for your suggestion about the RI/autoimmune causes, I have looked into that a little bit but it would require some traveling for us. I don't really get why some REs don't 'believe' in it, lol. I'm going to ask my RE about doing some of the testing and see what she says. We did a little bit of RPL testing after the 2nd one but definitely not all of it. Thanks so much for sharing your perspective, I know you've been through your own version of hell over the last year.

kristyn831 · August 2014

((Hugs)) I'm so very sorry. I think a counselor is a great idea, seeing one has helped me immensely. I hope you get some answers soon.

aves0708 · August 2014

I don't have much advice to offer but I am so sorry you are going through this. ((hugs))I hope when you get a chance to talk to the RE, he/she can provide you some guidance on what the next steps should be.

theholmanherd · August 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. (((HUGS)))

SweetieShellieH · August 2014

Oh sweetie I'm so sorry ... I know how hard one loss is, I can't imagine how hard it is for you to go through it yet again. If you go through RPL testing, I hope it'll give you the answers so that you can finally have your take home baby.

Lots of hugs your way!

BunnyBerry · August 2014

I'm so sorry. That's just so unfair! No wonder you are frustrated with IUIs.

I'm sorry, I have no advice - but I want to give you a big 3T hug! And pray for you to find peace in this awful time.

Chasity08 · August 2014

No advice but wanted to say how sorry I am and offer lots of <<hugs>>

clover30 · August 2014

I'm So sorry you are going through this. No advice but I agree with others that taking some time to explore the testing and options would be good.

Pintobean39 · August 2014

I'm so sorry (((hugs)))

I had 4 miscarriages in less than a year so I kinda know how you are feeling. I recommend doing some RLT to see if something can be figured out there. In my situation we pretty much know mine is egg quality because 2 were confirmed trisomy and I just turned 40 so age is a huge factor. My Rheumatologist did a ton of testing on me to figure out why because I was seeing her at the time anyway and my RE did genetic testing on my husband and I to make sure it wasn't something with us.

Teenie16 · August 2014

I am so very sorry for your loss. If you decide to take some time or keep testing I think talking to a therapist would completely help you .They may not be able to relate but it is great to have someone to listen to you when you going though all of this.

Sewfie · August 2014

I'm so, so sorry for your loss. I can't offer any advice, but it sounds like pps have some good suggestions. <<<hugs>>>

shirleymaeby · August 2014

I am so, so sorry for your losses. I have no advice either but wanted to give you some ((hugs)) and let you know you'll be in my thoughts. Hopefully you can get some answers through testing.

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IUI #3 = another c/p. Not sure what to do next. :( (BFP/loss warning)

Re: IUI #3 = another c/p. Not sure what to do next. :( (BFP/loss warning)

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