Multiples

nanny raise?!? also anniversay gift

I hired an awesome person to be our nanny a year ago. She is mostly great and is truly amazing with my LOs. My only concern is her lack of cleanliness. If I tell you that vacuuming everyday as a task - it does not make it optional.
Anyways, sorry for the little rant; my questions are:

1) we gave her an almost 7% raise 3 months in as we wanted to show our appreciation and make sure that she stayed (our previous nanny left due to money but at the time we were stretched thin and were waiting until we paid down a loan and our raises before we could pay more). Our current nanny's year anniversary is coming-up - is it fair to not give a raise given that we gave such a big one? We are again strapped for cash :(

2) would you/if you did give your nanny an anniversary of hire gift - to show your appreciation? If so what?

3) do you do anything for your nanny's birthday? What?

Thanks for reading and any advice you can provide would be greatly appreciated. TIA

Re: nanny raise?!? also anniversay gift

  • I would give a raise or a gift for the year anniversary. If I were you I would get her a gift card for a spa (and give her a day off) or retail for $150-200 and explain that financially you are unable to give her a raise this year. Hopefully next year you will be able to!

    We don't have a nanny but I would have the kids make her a card for her birthday and maybe bake a cake. If you are close with her start asking questions about her hobbies or what she is in to and get her a gift accordingly. As a teacher I loved gift cards. But it was also nice to get personal gifts because then I knew they cared enough about me to take an interest.

    GL! I hope she has time to vacuum! (Maybe bring up the importance of that to you? I would rather my kids be played with than my house vacuumed, but I can also appreciate the feeling of coming home to a clean house. It's hard enough with twins to get anything done, I couldn't imagine trips! Maybe ask her how you can help facilitate her having the time to clean. Like you get home and take the kids for a walk so she can clean up?)
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  • Thanks Katie for the advice. She has a 2 hour break Everyday - I don't get that at my job, so this is why I don't understand why she can't get her chores done. When the kids are awake, she is just amazing with them, playing and teaching which is what I value the most in her.
  • I don't have a nanny but my husband hasn't had a raise in 3 years and I get anywhere from a 1.5-2% cost of living raise a year. I have a 4 year old that has been in a daycare center on a part-time basis since she was 10w and at the centers we usually saw an increase about equal to the cost of living raise (1-2%). She been at a preschool for the past 2 years and there was no increase in cost this year.

    What I'm getting at and my perspective is that you gave her a 7% increase 9 months ago so I wouldn't think another is necessary at this point. I might be wrong though cause like I said, no nanny. I like the poster above response about doing an anniversary gift - gift card or cash but I don't think I would explain anything about your finances at this point. Money is a definite motivator and I think if you let her know your cards then you aren't going to get more out of her cause she'll feel like there isn't a reason to.

  • A bit off task, @mommaoftrips‌ how did you find your nanny? I would like to look at getting one, but dont have the network in my new town that I had before...
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  • @Bigboneded‌ I found her by advertising on kijiji
    @sing4mysavior‌ - yes, my triplets do sleep for 2 hours every day. When I am at home alone with them I always do my chores, such as vacuuming right when I put them down as it takes them a few minutes to go to sleep. I do not ask my nanny to vacuum the entire house I just the open concept area. This takes me 5-7 minutes tops which would not effect nap time. And yes, she sits on her phone and also naps during the 2 hour nap time. I do agree with the sit down talk and I plan to do this during her 1-year review. I pay her good money and expect more during this time.
  • I'll be honest, unless she is a nanny + housekeeper I don't think it's reasonable to ask her to vacuum daily. Unless they accidentally make a mess, like spilling food on the floor or something. I think cleaning duties directly related to watching the kids are fine - e.g. Washing bottles, putting away toys, putting kids' plates in dishwasher, even the kids' laundry, etc. Vacuuming the play area is a maid's responsibility and frankly I don't understand doing that daily. If your kids make a giant food mess maybe look into putting a mat or towel under their chairs and asking her to clean that instead of the whole floor.

    To answer your questions I do not automatically give raises but try to sort of get a feel for where she is at every so often. I'm terrible about remembering anniversaries so this happens when I remember. For birthdays, a gift would be nice of you but I don't think it's obligatory.
  • Couple of things to maybe take with a grain of salt as we don't have a nanny:
    - if she worked for a company, fulfilling her job expectations would impact a raise
    - napping on the job wouldn't be acceptable- has this been discussed and ok'd in the past?
    - most likely one wouldn't wait until a set review point to discuss them. If they are issues in your mind I would think addressing them sooner rather than later would be good. This prevents you from becoming more and more frustrate that things aren't happening the way you want and prevents misunderstandings on her part about what is acceptable and what isn't. It's also not fair for you to come back and say "you're not getting a raise because you do X, Y and Z" if you've not discussed that said actions are an issue an they've been going on for some time. She should be given a chance to remedy any issues.
    - my employer never did anything for my birthday. The time clock would tell me "happy anniversary" when I punched in for the first time after that day and they mailed me a card. I didn't care about either.
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  • We gave our nanny $160 for her birthday. We gave a raise after 4 months of working for us so we probably won't automatically give one at a year. My nanny always has chores to do but watching multiples is hard work and I totally understand if she doesn't get everything done everyday. I tell her to make sure she takes some time for herself. I would not ask her to vaccum everyday but I would ask to keep it clean for them to play on.

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  • We gave our nanny a raise at the end of last year (~7%), after being with us for 6 months, and we will likely consider doing something this year -- not as much, but maybe something. 

    As for everyday tasks -- my attitude has always been that I am fundamentally paying her for developing and caring for my children. If that means she needs to sit on her phone while the girls nap to recharge her batteries (that's sure as hell what I need during their nap time), then so be it. That said, she does do a ton for us -- cleans the kitchen surfaces, does laundry, scrubs out bottles, etc. I've even told her she doesn't need to do these things (I personally feel a lot of this is more than she needs to do), but she's amazing and does them anyway. 

    We don't do anniversary gifts, but we do birthday, XMas, and little things around Easter and Halloween, since she always does these elaborate gifts for the girls on the same occasion.
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  • I don't think a raise is necessary, but a nice gift would be nice---I liked the spa idea depending on if she would like that. I understand the vacuuming and wanting that dones every day, and it is awesome that your kids all nap at the same time for so long, but like someone said...some days I am sure there are things that come up. When I am at home with my girls by myself, I get NOTHING done other than watching/playing with them. Some days, coming to work is a break. It's awesome that she is so good with your kids. That's what is important.

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  • We have a part time nanny and we LOVE her! She started on October 1 last year. We pay her "legally." She wanted her taxes withheld, so we pay a semi annual fee to the state for Worker's Comp and pay fees to NannyChex (payroll company). She works two 11 hour days for us and gets paid $14/hour ($154/day). I gave her a card and $50 on her 6 month anniversary to show our appreciation. I also gave her a gift worth $50 for her birthday and for Christmas. I also left her a $10 Starbucks gift card once. In her initial contract with us, she stated that she wanted annual reviews and raises. We are thinking of giving her a 5% raise on 10/1. We are hoping that she stays with us until 2020 (she will be 65 that year and will retire) and if my current pregnancy results in a take home baby, he/she would be 5 and starting kindergarten that year. If we give her a 5% raise every year, she will be making ~$19/hour by then! I just hope that DH & I keep getting raises so that we can give her raises!

    Wedding Fall 2007 Off OCP's since 9/08-started with BBT charts Saw Ob/gyn May 2009 Blood work normal except single copy of MTHFR Clomid 50mg May 2009 Clomid 50mg + IUI June 2009 Femara 5mg + IUI July 2009 Normal HSG July 2009 Femara 5mg + ovidrel+IUI August 2009 Femara 5mg +ovidrel + IUI September 2009 November 2009-normal lap December 2009-met with RE December/January-Injectible med cycle with IUI-Abnormal sperm morpology found-only 0-1% normal All Head defects. Jan/Feb 2010 1st IVF with ICSI-5 week chemical pregnancy :( Feb 2010-male infertility doc says DH's anatomy and blood work are normal so nothing he can do. :( FET July 2010-BFP! Twin m/c @ 5.5 wks :( Dec/Jan 2011 IVF #2 Only 4 eggs retrieved-Ganirelix dose messed up BFFN Feb/March 2011 IVF #3 ER 3/9 9 eggs, 7 fertilized, ET 3/14, No frosties. BFN IVF #4 ER 8/22 9R,7F ET 8/25-3 embies, 1 frostie! Beta 9/2= 54, 9/6=274, 9/8=625, 9/12=2953, 9/16 greater than 10,000. B/G TWINS born April 2012 @ 36wks & 1 day! July 2014-going back for the frozen embryo! ET 7/28, heartbeat seen at 6wks1day with SCH. Miscarriage confirmed at 6wks4days





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