Obgyn - Weigh In Rant

zelg · August 2014

As a FTM, every little thing about pregnancy has me obsessing -- weight, unfortunately, being one of the top ones. That being said, I've been tracking my weight gain meticulously throughout my pregnancy. I weigh myself before every prenatal visit and that number is always plus or minus one pound different than the one on the office scale. Anyway, according to my scale at home, I have gained one pound since my last visit. The scale at the obgyn said I was 11, yes ELEVEN, pounds heavier than I was four weeks ago. So I sat there, in shock, as the doctor lectured me for the majority of my appointment about what foods I need to avoid and to never gain 11 pounds in a month ever again. I seriously was dumbfounded. All my clothes still fit me like they used to and I feel no different at all. When I came home, I weighed myself again and was the exact same weight that I was before the visit. I'm super annoyed and embarrassed about the whole thing. I decided to call the office and left a message explaining my situiation, which in retrospect probably won't change a thing but I was upset. Bottom line is: could the doctor's scale seriously be THAT wrong?

Sorry for the long post, ladies. I'm really upset

I have been eating right and exercising this entire pregnancy and this just came to me as a giant slap to the face. I just needed to get it off my chest!!

PacoCat33 · August 2014

That seems wrong. unless your scale is the one that is really off?

Regardless, I don't believe a doctor has the right to weight-shame you. If you are eating right and exercising and did gain 11 pounds in a month, then you gained 11 pounds and how are you supposed to control that. I would be really annoyed at the doctor no matter if their scale was right or wrong.

nesenotes · August 2014

First off its not good to obsess about it because there can be many variables in a number on a scale. But jeez that sucks! Thats a huge difference! If you are eating balanced and moving your body dont worry too much. Try to let this sucky appt roll off your back. I know thats easier said than done.

zelg · August 2014

Thanks for the response! I originally thought my scale was wrong of course, but my scale matched the doctors at every single appointment besides this one so I'm not sure if that's the case

oh well..

JRod13 · August 2014

Maybe they wrote your weight down wrong at your last appointment? That's a pretty big difference.

Beansjjo · August 2014

My scale is 10 pounds off from the doctors scale, I had lost so much weight in 1st tri and when I gained 10 on my scale and went for my check up only to find out i had only gained 2 pounds in 4 wks.. i was so upset, completely different in ur situation but still devistating non the less. Thats horrible how she put u down

abcmom12 · August 2014

JRod13 said:

Maybe they wrote your weight down wrong at your last appointment? That's a pretty big difference.

this is more common than you think. at my last visit, the nurse reversed the numbers for my blood pressure and heart rate

AlwaysForgetful · August 2014

Next time stop your OB if they start to make a weight comment. Really. Stop them in their tracks and inform them that weight shaming is NOT appropriate. You eat well and work out. It isn't like you are inactive. If they are worried about your weight, they can make a note in your chart but you don't wish to hear it. Be firm.

The OB I am getting switched back to did that... Once. Now, in my case, I have a previous pregnancy history. My OB started to get upset because I gained 25lbs by 20? weeks. Something like that. I ended up gaining 50 the whole pregnancy. Anyway, I stopped her. I pointed out unless it is causing an actual issue with my pregnancy (I am a fluff ball already), I don't want to hear it. I then told her to familiarize herself with my history including my pre pregnancy weight and my weight 4 weeks post partem. EVERY time I have been 5lbs below my pre pregnancy weight by then. I have never had an issue with the OB commenting on weight before her and I had several pregnancies before her.

BabyRN2009 · August 2014

I'm sure there was an error somewhere. Also, like pp said, I too gained 8lbs in 4 weeks around the 24 week mark with both pregnancies. Expecting this 3rd time to be no different (but not quite there yet...). I gained 38 and 28 pounds with my first 2, so it was all normal in the end! Sometimes there is just a big growth spurt despite eating healthy and there's nothing we can do about it!

drpayne · August 2014

It sounds like a mistake. Definitely bring it up next time!

That said, I really get tired of people saying it's not your doctor's job to tell you if you're on track to gain too much. It is his/ her job, actually. There is a recommended range for a reason. I know some women gain what they gain no matter what they eat or how much they exercise but that is often not the case. If a woman is gaining too much and her doctor doesn't even mention it out of fear if hurting feelings, that's irresponsible. No one likes to hear it and they should be tactful, of course, but it doesn't make the doctor a bully.

MrsBee124 · August 2014

The doctors scale could definitely be off that much....it does happen. Or someone could have written down your last weigh in wrong. In the case that it wasn't a mistake, I can tell you this: With both of my previous pregnancies I had one huge weight gain between appointments (24-28ish weeks), and I was embarrassed and wondered how it happened because I was always careful about what I ate. My nurse AND doctor both told me not to worry, and that most women have at least one big jump during their pregnancies. As long as you're not gaining 11 pounds in between every appointment, I would not worry about it!

emp156 · August 2014

i agree w/ PPs. aside from the number from 4weeks ago to now (which could quite possibly be inaccurate), are you generally on track looking at the pregnancy as a whole? meaning, assuming you did gain 10 in four weeks, that may balance out if looking at where you are (20 weeks, say)... just a thought.

there's a great chapter about weight gain and doctors in "expecting better" by emily oster. if you haven't read it, check it out. it will make you feel better (regardless of your current weight gain status).

sorry that your doc made you feel badly.

twoandthrough · August 2014

Did you eat before the appointment? That combined with the doctor's scale being a few pounds off could easily account for the 10 lbs.

Meether · August 2014

I gained 11lbs during week 16-20 and got a lecture from the nurse. I called the ob after and he said not to worry because my total weight gain was 15. He said it could be because I drink so much water, 2-3 gallons per day. I don't eat a ton but he said I will still retain the weight necessary for my body to maintain the pregnancy. I'm not too worried but I've been tracking my calories per recommendation of the nurse, and what do you know, I eat 1200-1500 calories per day....

Shortstack06 · August 2014

I had the scale issue happen to me, I went up 16 pounds in one appointment. Luckily the nurse looked at me as I raised my eye brows, we went to another scale and I had actually gained 4. So it could be their scale. You could tell the doctor it made you uncomfortable to be lectured on your weight if your pregnancy is still healthy.

MaineMama · August 2014

drpayne said:

It sounds like a mistake. Definitely bring it up next time! That said, I really get tired of people saying it's not your doctor's job to tell you if you're on track to gain too much. It is his/ her job, actually. There is a recommended range for a reason. I know some women gain what they gain no matter what they eat or how much they exercise but that is often not the case. If a woman is gaining too much and her doctor doesn't even mention it out of fear if hurting feelings, that's irresponsible. No one likes to hear it and they should be tactful, of course, but it doesn't make the doctor a bully.

This, times a billion. Obviously no doctor should talk about weight/weight gain in a condescending lecture kind of way, but it is an important indicator in overall health and it is their job to talk about it. It is also their job to discuss healthy eating habits and exercise.

ebilbao · August 2014

That sucks!! You should def. bring it up at your next appt. My ob said I had gained a bit fast (5lbs more than I should have at that point) and I thought, really? For 5lbs you're gonna say something?

rshamos · August 2014

drpayne said:

It sounds like a mistake. Definitely bring it up next time! That said, I really get tired of people saying it's not your doctor's job to tell you if you're on track to gain too much. It is his/ her job, actually. There is a recommended range for a reason. I know some women gain what they gain no matter what they eat or how much they exercise but that is often not the case. If a woman is gaining too much and her doctor doesn't even mention it out of fear if hurting feelings, that's irresponsible. No one likes to hear it and they should be tactful, of course, but it doesn't make the doctor a bully.

I agree! I think my OB is afraid to bring up weight gain so I do at my appointment. I think it's important that you have open conversations about everything with your doctor. That being said, it needs to be a conversation, not a lecture. Healthy weight gain is important in pregnancy (not too much not too little), but that magic number is different for everyone.

nashamber · August 2014

Weight gain is such a touchy subject. I, for one, know that I usually schedule the very first appointment of the day, I don't wear my watch or bracelets, and I wear the lightest outfit that I can find in my office wardrobe. It's ridiculously silly, but this is something I've been doing for many years and I haven't been able to break the craziness.

I agree with PP's that the nurse probably transposed the numbers at your last weigh-in or something is seriously wrong with your scale or the scale in your doctor's office. It's easier said than done, but try not to get too caught up on the numbers on the scale (seriously, I must practice what I preach). As long as your keeping active, eating healthy, and growing an adorably healthy baby, I believe you're in a really good place!

ColeyCannoli · August 2014

abcmom12 said:

JRod13 said:

Maybe they wrote your weight down wrong at your last appointment? That's a pretty big difference.

this is more common than you think. at my last visit, the nurse reversed the numbers for my blood pressure and heart rate

Mistakes do happen. Maybe they switched some numbers around (during the last appointment or this one). Either way, screw the doctor who shamed you. I can't believe they would do that, especially if it was the first time you gained so much so fast.

I left my first OB when she told me at 8 weeks to only gain 20lbs or less so it'd be easier for me to lose the excess. At that point, I had already gained a quick 10 and it made me feel like a complete failure. So many doctors need to rethink how they frame conversations about weight...

trizzie · August 2014

I don't look and I don't allow them to discuss my weight. This is my 3rd baby and I know that my body gains a LOT of weight when I am pregnant (I also have really big babies). I lose it all afterwards and I refuse to obsess or stress about something I have no control over. I agree with pp - stop them in their tracks next time.

Cryssteen · August 2014

I gained 10lbs pretty quickly in the first trimester. I knew it was too much. But, having the doctor say it to me made me feel ashamed, guilty and embarrassed. What's worse is my DH was there. So, I had a witness. Following the appointment, he would comment on anything I ate outside of the "South Beach Phase 2" type of diet the OB suggested. It made me really angry. But, in truth, so many people don't understand weight and weight gain. She probably wasn't as harsh as it actually seemed to you. Just do your best to be healthy. Stop obsessing. You're going to make yourself crazy and anxiety-ridden, which is not safe for the baby.

Alionken · August 2014

I would bet anything they wrote your last weight down wrong. At my very first appt they somehow added 12 pounds to my baseline weight. Every appt after that they would ask me if I was getting sick a lot. Until I got above the weight that they mistakenly entered into the computer, I had to remind them every time that it was recorded incorrectly. At least I never I got lectured!!!

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