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December 2014 Moms
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Shower Invites

PacoCat33PacoCat33 member
in December 2014 Moms
Hello Mamas,

I have a  (trivial, small) dilemma and I'm hoping you can help me...

So, when I got married, I did not change my last name for many reasons and my husband was and is all for this. Our LO will have my last name as his middle name and my DH's name as his last name. 

While the majority of people on my shower list would have no issues with this.. his Aunt (who is crazy) would flip her lid if I had my last name on the invite and not my husbands. She is a crazy person, and it is always better to keep the peace and just try to ignore her than ruffle her feathers, and we have never told her that I didn't change my name. There are many things that I would like to argue with her, but again it is just not worth it. Especially for my husband's sanity. 

Anywho... I'm trying to think if I should just put my name as is on the invite, or to avoid conflict if I should put First name Last Name DH Last name. 

My DH asked if his name could go on the invite, but it isn't a Jack and Jill shower, so that won't work. Has anyone been in this situation? What are your thoughts?  
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Re: Shower Invites

  • perfectlove09perfectlove09 member
    Ugh,...I'm spiteful at times and there's a part of me that says "don't bend over backwards to make ONE person happy over such a trivial and stupid thing that she should have ZERO concern about...." but since that's probably not the advice you're looking to hear...Um....maybe just change her invite. I wouldn't change them all just to make her happy.
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  • hellopartyof5hellopartyof5 member
    Will his family members know your maiden name?  I know MH aunts wouldn't know my maiden name at all.  Butttt how many people with my first name would be having baby showers right now? Sooo nvm.  I think I would just do First Name Actual Last Name DH Last Name so its all on there.  But this is coming from a woman who was super excited to change her last name and be official lol, so take it with a grain of salt.
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  • xc1148xc1148 member
    nauticallife's suggestion, because some people might not know your maiden name. Otherwise, I wouldn't change anything. People need to learn the world doesn't revolve around them, technically it's your name so it goes on the card. It's just an invitation, if she freaks, tell your hubby to handle it.
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  • bombe4bombe4 member
    I agree with PP. Just change the old lady's to DH's last name. Not worth fighting over.

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  • CandEChicagoCandEChicago member
    If you are doing a printing service just put both last names behind your first name. This is not a formal legal document.

    Then again right now I am all... The easier and less explanation you have to provide the better.


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  • bibliophiletorybibliophiletory member
    my concern about putting both last names would be how that might affect people trying to look up your registries.  just something to consider!
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  • Disneygeek77Disneygeek77 member
    I don't know.  I mean are you going to hide birth announcements, Christmas cards, and birthday parties from her too?  She is going to find out eventually, right ?  Might as well rip off the bandaid and tell her now.
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  • PacoCat33PacoCat33 member
    Thanks for the suggestions, please keep 'em coming!

    @Disneygeek77‌ when we send things out as a family we say "the DH last name", or just our first names since that is easiest and all encompassing. So to be honest, except my Facebook... There's really no other time it is an issue... At least not yet.
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  • Disneygeek77Disneygeek77 member
    Even birth announcements ?  I understand where you are coming from, I just think that eventually she will find out so might as well get it over with and tell her now.
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  • PacoCat33PacoCat33 member
    Yeah, I think for a birth announcement we would say "Me and Husband First Name Welcome Baby's Entire name" I like the look of that so the last name isn't twice... Or something like, "join Me and DH in Welcoming Baby XX XX XX" 
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  • Disneygeek77Disneygeek77 member
    Sounds good.  Again, I understand where you are coming from, but in my experience, it is better to come out in the open with things like this and get it over with.  
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  • drpaynedrpayne member
    Maybe I'm the only one wondering why you're printing your own shower invitations ?
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  • PacoCat33PacoCat33 member
    @drpayne - I'm not. My sister is hosting my shower for me and asked how she should include my name. 
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  • Shortstack06Shortstack06 member
    My shower invites were just ordered and they didn't put any last name in any variation on them. It does say RSVP to "My Mom's Name" (Grandmother-to-be) ***-***-****.  These are all going to family members and friends that know I am expecting, so it shouldn't be an issue with not having a last name on them any where. 
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  • kelsz12kelsz12 member
    My vote is to use the name that people know you by. To include my husband on our invites (though it is a ladies only shower), we just included his name on the part where it says 'Jason & Kelsey are registered at...'
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