Questions TO current moms!

BRNCLES · August 2014

I'm obsessed with the unsolicited advice thread, so I thought I'd try a "new moms ask current moms" thread- not necessarily random questions worth googling, but more of a girl on girl real talk sesh, TMI and all.

First Time Ladies, feel free to join in with your own curiosities- but if not, I have a seriously major question: what the hell will be going on with my body after I give birth?! I'm seeing in the advice thread hints of weird leakage, unfortunate pooping and the need for mesh panties. Exactly what does this even mean? And how long will it go on for? Can I kiss my sex life with husband goodbye because I'm a weird butt monster?

Yes, I realize I don't NEED to worry about this eight months in advance, but if it's coming out of my body I WANT to mentally prepare for it so I don't give myself a heart attack in April.

lindsayanne14 · August 2014

I'm sure everyone's experience is a little different, but here's mine...I had an uncomplicated vaginal birth, no tearing or stitches. I was terrified to go to the bathroom after, you seriously feel as though you may pee/poop your insides out. I got dermatitis (skin infection) a week after birth from constantly wearing pads. The itching was crazy. My boobs were so enormous and uncomfortable when my milk came in I couldn't even tolerate a hug. My deflated baby bump was mushy and I felt uncomfortable in everything I wore, maternity clothes were too big, regular clothes too tight. I would say looking back it was at least 4 months before I felt like myself again. I didn't realize it at the time though, the first 3 months were truly like a hazy dream!

redneckmomma25 · August 2014

Bleeding can last a few weeks. You will have clots. You will also use a peri bottle instead of wiping your vag for a few weeks. You will have tucks pads and dermoplast to help with the pain of heeling. Don't look down there. After you give birth nurses will punch your stomach down. Really uncomfortable. I also had a catheter for 12 hours or so because of the drugs. I couldn't pee. That was awful. No sex for 6 weeks until you get cleared by tour gyno. That's if you want to have sex ever again. Your hair will start to fall out a couple months pp. Like a lot. Hand fulls. It will slow and you will have baby hair for a while that will be uncontrollable.

abc829 · August 2014

Is this vagina killing thing only for non c section births?

Deez10 · August 2014

abc829 said:

Is this vagina killing thing only for non c section births?

Not necessarily. Depends on if you have an emergency c-section or not. Hours of pushing can still cause damage.

Scheduled c-section on the other hand? I had one with DS & everything down there is exactly how it was before I was ever pregnant.

Deez10 · August 2014

RHoPA1109 said:

How does a scheduled c-section come about?

DS got himself lodged in there & stuck completely - I was in labor for 3 days with no progress.

nahawley82 · August 2014

@RHoPA1109 I had a scheduled c section with my first because I had fibroids which was basically prohibiting my baby from dropping; with my c section I was most surprised that I still bled a ton! I naively thought only vaginal births bled, esp in large amounts! I was not a fan of mesh panties, I much preferred granny panties! Birth is sooo glamorous!

obelishky · August 2014

C section recoveries are pretty rough from about day 2 to 7. Your abdominal muscles are basically shot and you don't realize how much you use them. I made it to a 9 and stayed at a 9 for 6 hours before hey c sectioned, so I got the best of both worlds. Things are mostly back to normal, but that first little bit is rough.

starshollow · August 2014

I had a c section and I was surprised at how much my vagina hurt after. I didn't push but I did dialate to about 9 first. I bled for about 4 weeks. The first week was heavy and then it was very light spotting. Also, no tampons because nothing in or out of the vagina.

OliveMom3 · August 2014

I remember having a cold with a runny nose, crying, leaking milk, bleeding out of my vagina and bum thinking that I'm only missing my ears as an orifice for stuff to come out of. It was a hard pill to swallow.

kap05 · August 2014

Why does hair fall out???

Deez10 · August 2014

kap05 said:

Why does hair fall out???

Answer from google:
Here's what's going on. Normally, about 85 to 95 percent of the hair on your head is growing and the other 5 to 15 percent is in a resting stage. After the resting period, this hair falls out — often while you're brushing or shampooing it — and is replaced by new growth. An average woman sheds about 100 hairs a day.

During pregnancy, increased levels of estrogen prolong the growing stage. There are fewer hairs in the resting stage and fewer falling out each day, so you have thicker, more luxuriant tresses.

After you give birth, your estrogen levels take a tumble and a lot more hair follicles enter the resting stage. Soon you'll have more hair coming out in the shower or on the brush. This unusual shedding will taper off and your hair will be back to its pre-pregnancy thickness about six to 12 months after you give birth.

By the way, not all women notice dramatic changes in their hair during pregnancy or the postpartum period. Among those who do, it tends to be more obvious among women with longer hair.

be888 · August 2014

I had a pretty easy vaginal delivery with no tearing, but it felt like someone hit me between the legs with a baseball bat. The swelling was pretty intense!!

redneckmomma25 · August 2014

Lube and alcohol for your first pp sex. Don't expect your first pp sex to be successful either. It can take a few times.

mhickey426 · August 2014

The first time we had sex hurt a little but not to bad. Just go easy. It takes a little while to get the sex to be as good as it once was.
I tore and was cut and it was definitely sore but the worst part was having a bowl movement for the first time. I cried on the toilet I was more scared about that then having the baby. Things are swollen, sore, there are stiches and now I have to push something else out! NOT FUN

kap05 · August 2014

Deez10 said:

kap05 said:

Why does hair fall out???

Answer from google:
Here's what's going on. Normally, about 85 to 95 percent of the hair on your head is growing and the other 5 to 15 percent is in a resting stage. After the resting period, this hair falls out — often while you're brushing or shampooing it — and is replaced by new growth. An average woman sheds about 100 hairs a day.

During pregnancy, increased levels of estrogen prolong the growing stage. There are fewer hairs in the resting stage and fewer falling out each day, so you have thicker, more luxuriant tresses.

After you give birth, your estrogen levels take a tumble and a lot more hair follicles enter the resting stage. Soon you'll have more hair coming out in the shower or on the brush. This unusual shedding will taper off and your hair will be back to its pre-pregnancy thickness about six to 12 months after you give birth.

By the way, not all women notice dramatic changes in their hair during pregnancy or the postpartum period. Among those who do, it tends to be more obvious among women with longer hair.

Thank you!

kap05 · August 2014

RHoPA1109 said:

My god I'm so scared for my vagina/perineum/asshole/clit/sanity

Same here!

redneckmomma25 · August 2014

kap05 said:

RHoPA1109 said:

My god I'm so scared for my vagina/perineum/asshole/clit/sanity

Same here!

Could all be fine. I had a single stitch. Wasn't even a first degree tear. Recovery was smooth. First pp poop was fine as well. Nerve wracking. But fine.

The nurse and dr. messaged my perineum with ever push I had. Felt strange but I swear that made all the difference in the world.

AprilloMom · August 2014

Honestly, it wasn't as bad as what I had prepared myself for. I pushed for 2.5 hours and had a significant tear. The nurse told me I was super swollen and it was going to hurt pretty badly. Yes I was sore, but it wasn't bad enough to take pain meds for. Peeing did sting but the water bottle helped. And I did use an ice pack a couple of times a day for the first few days. I took a stool softener and my fist poop wasn't bad at all. I had heavy bleeding for about 4 days and then it slowed down to a normal period flow for about another week. Don't freak yourself out too much. It's worth it.

Unknown · August 2014

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greneyedmom19 · August 2014

Yea like everyone else has said will happen. I never had my hair fall out but I bleed for 6 weeks, 6! And I had a pretty normal vaginal delivery, only needed two stitches. I really didn't have any pain down there, but the bottle did relive the burn from urination. The worst part of it all was pooping. It was a few days before I could go after the epidural and giving birth because all of that is rough on your body so when I went I must have torn my ass because I screamed and cried on the toilet. The only thing to relive that pain and help to heal it was the tub they give you to soak your ass in. Your put really hot water in it, sir it in the toilet and then sit in it and it is amazing. It relaxes all of your muscles so the pain and tension can go away.

CynthiaC1213 · August 2014

I had recovery all worked up in my head as something way worse than it actually was. I was up and out of the house within a week, and I was only a little sore the next day. However, the one thing no one ever mentioned was the dissolvable stitches coming out. I had no idea what the stabbing pain near my vagina was, so I googled until I figured out it was the stitches working themselves out. Major ouch!

AggieDaner · August 2014

The other ladies have it covered. Don't panic, it is what it is. It sucks for a while, then it gets better, then a few months/years later your brain convinces you it was no big deal and suddenly you want to do it all over again, haha!

BabiesEverywhere · August 2014

CynthiaC1213 said:
I had recovery all worked up in my head as something way worse than it actually was. I was up and out of the house within a week, and I was only a little sore the next day. However, the one thing no one ever mentioned was the dissolvable stitches coming out. I had no idea what the stabbing pain near my vagina was, so I googled until I figured out it was the stitches working themselves out. Major ouch!

I agree with this! Recovery wasn't a walk in the park (which was partially because I had a tiny new human to figure out at the same time) but it was do-able. I also had the issue with the stitches - I was feeling discomfort again and was afraid I had torn stitches out or something but my midwife said it was just the stitches coming out that caused the feeling.

When my sister had her baby in 2012 I remember my mom making a comment something like "oh, I'd forgotten about all the bleeding and pads and whatnot..." At the time I thought that was just because it had been 23 years since she had given birth. But even though I gave birth just a year ago, I sometimes have to try really hard to remember the negative stuff. In summary, I'm trying to comfort you that it will be hard when you go through it but will be so worth it that it probably won't be what you remember.

A+R=T · August 2014

Most things seem to be covered here but I'll add in my 2 cents. Take all the ice pads....best thing ever for swelling and pain! Buy some granny type panties for the pp pads, I loved the Wal-Mart George brand bikini ones and always infinity pads. Use the spray bottle, wiping kind of sucks. I did have to put pressure on my stitches for that first pp poop and had some pretty mean hemorrhoids...Take the cream if they offer it for those. Watch your dang stitches when they make you pee in that measuring cup pp because it's just like a bowl thing under the toilet seat and it's close. The first day is the worst, I had a hard time walking but once I got up and showered the next day I felt a million times better and even went grocery shopping 2 days pp. It all sounds crazy and ugly but it truly is a blur and you are too busy staring at this brand new life that is all yours to even really notice the discomfort!

michellegrrrr · August 2014

I had an emergency cs at the end of 22 hours of labour, no pushing though! Recovery was bad but mostly because I was scared too be around for fear of my insides spilling out! Lol the worst for me was the boobs! They really hurt, and get hard! I pumped got almost 12 weeks because my don couldn't breast feed... I felt like a sloppy sort of zoo attraction, pump feed pump feed, never ending but once I felt recovered enough it was easier to get back to myself!!

skybyknight1 · August 2014

My scheduled c-section was because my daughter was breech

KPawich · August 2014

I must be weird Bc I had none of these issues... I had a CS with DD and I went in, they cut me open, took out baby girl, stitched me up and sent me upstairs. I was up and walking within 24 hours and peed on my own as well... My mom tried to tell me I needed granny panties and Victoria Secret Low rise bottoms were just fine. I was in yoga pants as well. Pottying (#2) was a little difficult because of all of the pain meds but that's common with any pain medication (at least in my experience). I was sore (naturally I was sliced open) but other than that I was good. Oh and my DD was born 12/7 and we had sex 12/25... Merry Christmas. I just listened to my body and took it very easy.

All went well. It's not scary.

Kate Pawich

topaz7777 · August 2014

Your girl parts are stretchy and go back to normal, so don't freak about that. Sex at first was pretty uncomfortable but that becomse more normal too. Also, do kegal exercizes because your bladder will have a mind of it's own for a little while. Your body will forever be different and a new mom body which isn't a terrible thing, but don't expect it to ever look or act the way it did before this.

sagehens47 · August 2014

Question...
Are you sent home with prescription meds for the pain? And I'm not talking prescription ibuprofen.

You definitely don't see this part of pp in the movies!

redneckmomma25 · August 2014

danadubois47 said:
Question...
Are you sent home with prescription meds for the pain? And I'm not talking prescription ibuprofen.

You definitely don't see this part of pp in the movies!

I did not. I didn't have a reason for it.

Unknown · August 2014

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CynthiaC1213 · August 2014

danadubois47 said:

Question... Are you sent home with prescription meds for the pain? And I'm not talking prescription ibuprofen. You definitely don't see this part of pp in the movies!

I took Percocet in the hospital and was sent home with prescription for ibuprofen. I just bought a giant bottle of OTC Ibuprofen instead, though. I don't know if you could get something stronger if you ask for it or if you have a CS.

topaz7777 · August 2014

I was uncomfortable after, but over the counter meds were plenty for me.

CKL2414 · August 2014

Mine was a little different than normal..my placenta didn't detach from the uterine wall. There is a lining that sheds that helps it slide right out after birth..well my lining never formed properly. After I had already been stitched up, my physician had to go in elbow deep and scrape the placenta out in pieces. I ripped again, and had to be stitched up again.
She told me to be grateful I chose to have an epidural or I would be in severe pain. I was after it wore off. It was a difficult first week of recovery, same stuff as everyone else mentioned. Witch Hazel was my very best friend!
Another thing worth mentioning is hormones!!!! There are all sorts of hormones ranging through you! I cried A LOT for almost no reason. It's okay! It will pass and you will figure it all out with time

I just kept reminding myself that women have done this in the past with a lot less.

vspek · August 2014

Bleeding and all that last for sometime, varies with every pregnancy. The best thing that I was recommended was to get depends (adult diapers). They are so amazing when you are in the hospital and when you get home, So much better than those mesh panties with 3 pads and an ice pack. You still get the ice pack in (that's a must), but Depends make it the best!

Bring wipes with you as they will make it much better when you poop (with your hemorrhoids) and all the bleeding in general than toilet paper.

You need to eat before you go to the hospital as no one will let you eat anything until the baby is out and that can be hours.

I was not as scared about delivery as I was about having hemorrhoids. They are the worst!

Unknown · August 2014

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