TTC After a Loss

Introduction (other babies/pregnancies mentioned)

daniosaurdaniosaur member
edited August 2014 in TTC After a Loss
After recently getting pregnant for the first time, and being very thrilled, my husband and I just learned that I've had a miscarriage. I'm heartbroken, and on top of it, the night that I started bleeding, my cousin called me to tell me her water broke, and on the following day I lost my baby, while she delivered a healthy baby girl. To be honest, it was hard enough when we've been trying to conceive, and her, my sister, and every other woman on the planet (it seems) has gotten pregnant (and stayed pregnant/delivered healthy babies) all around me. I feel selfish and isolated and horrible. Sigh. This was my biggest fear and something I never thought I'd truly be faced with. I'm sure I'm probably not alone there. I hope I don't sound too terrible. This is all very fresh. I hope to join this little community as I try again, if you'll have me. I want to be a mom more than anything else in the world. -_-

Re: Introduction (other babies/pregnancies mentioned)

  • One thing I've learned is that mc are far more common than I ever knew. My mother had a total of 6 between 3 children. Lots of hugs to you, I've just gone through my first mc as well. It's overwhelming for sure.
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss and the pain you are feeling. Welcome. This is a great group of very supportive women!

    Could you please put a *other babies/pregnancies mentioned* in your title? There are a lot of women here who are grieving and may find these things painful to read about. Also, please read the sticky post at the top of the board. You will find lots of great information on loss and the way this board operates. 
    imageimage
    Me: 29 DH:30 married 6/5/10
    DS: 10/12/12 via ECS (blood clot in umbilical cord)
    BFP 1/25/14 mc at 6 1/2 weeks  EDD: 10/4/14
    BFP 4/10/14 mc at 4 1/2 weeks  EDD: 12/15/14
    BFP 5/14/14 mc at 5 1/2 weeks  EDD: 1/20/15
    BFP 8/28/14 *please, please stick*  EDD: 5/10/15
  • Welcome and I'm so sorry for your loss. It's really not easy when all you want is to be a mom, but everyone here feels your pain, and this is a great place for support. Thanks for making the edit to your title! 
    Me: 24 
    DH: 25
    BFP: 1/12/14       EDD: 9/18/14     MC: 1/15/14
    BFP: 5/6/14         EDD: 1/5/15       MC: 5/10/14
    BFP: 12/29/14      EDD: 9/12/15      MC: 1/5/15
    Dx: PCOS - 8/20/14, Hashimoto's - 10/10/14, Gluten Allergy 10/10/14


    My Chart

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    TTCAL January Challenge
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  • Welcome. I am sorry for your loss.

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                ***TTCAL January siggy challenge ***
  • I am sorry for your loss. Welcome to the board. I certainly understand how you're feeling
  • Welcome. I'm terribly sorry for your loss. DH and I as well have recently been faced with a MMC and these ladies has been a wonderful help for my emotional state. If anyone knows what you are feeling it would be us. I hope you can find comfort in knowing you are not alone. ((Hugs))

    DH & I are both 28    Together: 12 years    Married: 09/24/2011

    BFP#1: January '12 - DD1 09/16/2012

    Preterm labor 31 weeks. Monitored for Hellp and diagnosed with oligohydramnios July '12

    BFP #2: 06/25 - EDD 03/05/15 MMC confirmed 8/1 - D&E 8/4 retained tissue discovered 8/20

    BFP #3 11/24 - 12/15 Heartbeat detected - DD2 07/29/15

  • I'm sorry for your loss. This is a great place to find support, we all understand the feelings you're having towards other pg people. Be kind to yourself.

    PgAL welcome


    Married 6/11/2011

    Me & Hubby: 34

    TTC journey started 12/2012

    BFP #1 6/5/2013, MC confirmed 6/26/2013 @ 7 wks

    BFP#2 8/25/2013 MC confirmed 10/16/2013 @ 12 wks (D&C 10/18)

    Diagnosis: unexplained RPL, unexplained IF.

    Also have hypothyroidism

    Started TTC again 12/2013

     

    IUI#1:Clomid CD 3-7, Trigger'ed CD 12. IUI CD 14. BFN

    IUI #2:Letrozole CD 3 - 7, Follistim CD 9, Trigger CD 10, IUI CD12. BFN

    Current plan: IVF with PGD. Antagonist - Vivelle Protocal. Stim start 12/1. ER 12/14.

    http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/502498

    image imageimage

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  • Welcome. So sorry for your loss. Everyone here has felt that way. You are not alone.

    BFP #1: 8/17/13     Due Date: 4/26/14      MMC discovered @ 9w 4d       D&C: 10/2/13
    BFP #2: 12/23/13       Due Date: 9/6/14      MMC discovered @ 8w 5d    D&C: 2/6/14
    BFP #3 8/26/14     Due Date: 5/7/15  

    imageimage


  • Welcome, friend!  Honestly,  I could have written this post.  You are NOT alone. YOU WILL BE OK!  It's important to take things one day at a time. Focus on what you need to help yourself feel better, and don't stress about what's right or what other people think. You need to allow your grief unfold.  Sending heaps of love :)  

    Me (34); DH (35)

    BFP 11/25/13; Heard strong heartbeats for 3 weeks; Natural MC (1/15/14)

    BFP 11/11/14 EDD 07/21/15 hoping for our rainbow!

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • I'm so sorry for your loss. Like others have said, you are not alone. As much as it sucks that we're all here, this board is an amazing place. ((Hugs)) and welcome.
  • Welcome to the board. I am so sorry for your loss. I hope that your stay here on TTCAL is a short one. These ladies have seen me through some of my darkest days. They're amazing.
    image
    Hubs & I -29 • Met 5/18/04 • Married 5/8/10
    BFP #1 DS 2/7/11 (Born @ 34 wks via ECS due to Pre-e) TTC #2 since Aug '13
    DX Low AMH (.58) March '14 • FSH-7.5 • E2-35.5 (Nov '14)
    SA- Great numbers • SIS- Clear (Nov '14)
     Cycle 1- Clomid CD3-7 & Trigger-BFP • EDD 1/12/15 
    Ectopic @ 5w6d • Methotrexate Shot 5/18/14
    Cycle 2,3,4- Clomid CD3-7 & Trigger-- BFN
    Cycle 5- Letrozole CD3-7 & Trigger BFFN
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    • Everyone Welcom
    TTCAL January Siggy Challenge • Animal Snow Interactions
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  • Thank you all for the support. It does help a bit to know you're not alone. Although I of course wish that no one had to feel this sort of pain. <3 
  • I am so sorry for your loss. It is truly everyone's greatest fear, and yet no one really thinks it will happen to them. Your feelings are very normal. Welcome to the board.
    TTCAL January Siggy Challenge: Animals in the Snow

    image

      
    About Me: 

    AMA 35 :  DH 33
    BFP#1 1/26/14 (EDD: 10/7/14).  MMC 3/10/14 D&C 3/14/14
    RE Consult 11/3/14 - AMH 2.25 "great" . FSH 7.10 . Low Vitamin D
    Myomectomy 12/17/14.  Benched until March.

    image

    My Ovulation Chart
  • Welcome, I am so sorry for your loss. Your feelings are totally normal. It's very hard to not feel jealous when people seem to be having healthy babies everywhere. MCs are more common than you realize, people just don't talk about them. I hope you find the support and comfort you're looking for here. These women are amazing!

    Started TTC Nov. 2011 

    1st clomid cycle June 2012- No response :: HSG August 2012- Left tube blocked, right tube clear :: 2nd clomid cycle Aug. 2012 BFN :: 3rd clomid cycle Sept. 2012 :: BFP Sept 30th :: DS born 6/15/13 :: BFP #2 7/29/14 M/C 8/5/14 :: BFP#3 10/20/14 DD born 7/1/2015 :: Applied to be surrogate April '17 :: Transferred 1 Embryo for IFs Dec. '17 :: Surro Babe born 9/11/18 :: Started 2nd Journey May '19 :: Transferred 1 Embryo for new IFs 9/24/19 :: HB 138 at 6w6d


  • Welcome. I'm sorry for your loss. Until I had my MC, I had no idea just how common they were. It seems it's not talked about a lot. I personally found that when I opened up with my co-workers about my losses, many of them had also lost babies as well. It made me feel a lot less alone. I hope just knowing you have a safe place to come and vent and receive encouragement gives you some hope. (((hugs)))
    BFP 3/30/13, MMC and D&C 4/19/13
    BFP 4/8/14, MMC 5/5/14, D&C 5/9/14
    BFP 8/26/14 Due date 5/8/15

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • I am so sorry for your loss. Welcome, this board really helped me work through my feelings of isolation. Take care of yourself.
  • I'm so sorry for your loss. It's rough, but I've found that it does get easier over time. I hope you find the comfort and support you are looking for here. Welcome.
    TTC: Since July 2013
    BFP #1: EDD 05/27/2014 (D&C 10/17/2014)
  • You don't sound terrible at all.  I think all of us here understand those feelings.  I'm so sorry for your loss.  ((hugs))
    November 2010 - 10.5 week loss  o:) 
    October 2011 - DS (7)  <3 
    July 2014 - Stillborn DD (24 weeks)  o:) 
    August 2015 - DD (3)  <3 
    April 2018 - 5 week loss o:) 

  • I am very sorry for your loss.  I know what you mean by every other woman being pregnant and giving birth to healthy babies, but know that you are not alone.  The women here are wonderful and I hope you find some comfort and support.  Many ((((HUGS)))
    TTC #3 since 8/2012 image
    DX Endometriosis 2/2002 (lost left tube due to a cyst), PCOS
    6/2010
     BFP - 10/18/2012, EDD - 6/26/2013, Baby Girl lost at 22 weeks (T21), D&E 2/15/2013
    BFP - 4/23/2014, EDD - 1/2/2015 Twin Boys lost at 12 weeks, M/C 6/25/2014

    My chart here  All ALers welcome!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    June 3Missing Our January Snowflake
  • I am so sorry for your loss. Please give yourself permission to grieve. So often we think we need to move on so quickly and the process may take a bit longer friend. Here is an article that might help: https://bit.ly/1r5IQS2. Hugs friend!
  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I understand that other pregnancies can be upsetting. I find I'm ok with women much further along than me. My SIL is due 3 weeks before I was and I find it more upsetting to talk to her some days about her pregnancy. Every day it gets a little easier though.

    BFP #1 05/03/12 DD: 12/18/12
    BFP #2 05/26/14 MMC: 6/26/14 D&C: 7/18/14
    BFP #3 10/09/14 MC 10/24/14


  • kj808kj808 member
    edited August 2014
    I'm sorry for your loss. I know what you mean about feeling alone. It seems like so many people are getting pregnant and i'm not and what's worse is there are so many who are getting pg "by accident" which is even harder for me to digest. Apparently my SIL is a fertile Myrtle so yeah, that's fun :(

    Anyway, this group is a great support system. It sure helps to be around those who know what you're going through. ((HUGS))
    May '15 January siggy challenge:
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    * Me: 33, DH: 34 * Married 11.10.06 *
    DS 10.2.07 | DD 7.27.10 | 4 angel babies
    BFP #7 | EDD 5.15.15 | It's a BOY!
     BabyFetus Ticker  
    image  image
  • I'm sorry for your loss.  Welcome to the board. (hugs)
    Me: 31     DH: 33
    Dx: Me: Recurrent Pregnancy Loss; DH: Low Morphology (2%)
    BFP#1: MC 3/1/11 at 6w1d - EDD 10/21/11
    BFP#2: 5/3/11 - EDD 1/9/12 - DD Born 1/6/12
    image
    TTC #2 since 12/13
    BFP#3: MC 2/8/14 at 4w5d - EDD 10/13/14
    BFP#4: MC 5/6/14 at 4w4d - EDD 1/9/15
    BFP#5: MMC discovered 8/4/14 at 9w1d - D&C 8/5/14 - Baby Boy with Trisomy 16 (maternal origin) - EDD 3/8/15
    BFP#6: CP 11/6/14 at 4w2d - EDD 7/14/15
    IVF #1 with ICSI & PGS: May/June 2015, ER 6/3/15, 17R/17M/15F
    IVF #2 with ICSI & PGS: July 2015, ER 7/16/15, 16R/11M/9F
    PGS results = 6 normal embryos (4 boys, 2 girls)
    FET 9/23/15 = BFFN
    Natural FET 11/4/15 = BFP!
    Beta 9dp5dt = 92

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