Attack of the Belly Rubbers!

LinziLoo09 · August 2014

So I have been very vocal (in person and on Facebook) about my distaste for belly rubbing. I'm just not a touchy feely person in general and my stomach seems to be a particularly intimate place for people to grab. Well, last night I went to a big get-to-gether with a bunch of friends I hadn't seen in a while, and my belly feels violated and assaulted now.

Rub #1 - The friend asked permission to touch my stomach, and I said "it's cool as long as I can touch yours." So we rubbed eachother's bellies mutually for a minute, which was actually pretty entertaining. I was cool with the encounter.

Rub #2 - A girl I'm not particularly close with just reached out and grabbed it when we said hi, but the encounter was super brief --- only a couple of seconds --- so, whatever.

Rub #3 - A girl who I primarily know through a mutual friend (but who has definitely seen my anti-belly-rubbing posts) decided to rub my stomach with both hands for upwards of a minute when we were just saying 'hi'. It was just super uncomfortable.

If that had been the extent of the belly rubbing, I would have been fine with it. Unfortunately, during my 'goodbyes' for the night, Rubber #3 decided to out-do herself. She rubbed my stomach with both hands for over 5 minutes! During the rub, she asked me what sex the baby was, and when I told her it was a girl, she said, "I don't know about that. You're carrying awfully low for it to be a girl." <cue rubbing the bottom of my stomach where it meets my vag...super personal area>. Eventually our mutual friend noticed and said, "Dude, don't you know she hates that! Didn't you see her facebook?" And I was able to slip away while they argued whether or not it was appropriate.

Sorry for the rant, guys, I just needed to vent! I am not looking forward to my remaining 17 weeks where this will apparently escalate.

ThePregosaurus · August 2014

Oh gosh. #3 just sounds so uncomfortable. The only belly rubber I've come into contact with is my mom and I don't really care BUT I think I'm finally starting to look pregnant and not like I've overeaten so that may change. I find that the people who STARE at my belly to see if it's gotten any bigger make me really uncomfortable. I feel like a hypocrite too bc before it was me I was guilty of doing this to friends. Live and learn.

JRod13 · August 2014

You're a better woman than I- I can't stand a belly rub and would definitely have told #3 to step off.

LinziLoo09 · August 2014

Yea, I had previously expected that in the case of a #3, I'd pull their hands away and let them know how rude it was. It was a more uncomfortable situation, though, since she wasn't a complete stranger but wasn't really a friend either. I felt a weird urge to be polite since I didn't know her well but knew that I would see her again. Also, the second, more disastrous belly rub by her happened in front of like 10 people, and I didn't know how to handle it publicly without coming off ruder than she was or without embarrassing her terribly. I was grateful that our mutual friend was more comfortable calling her out on it.

My passive aggressive attempt during the moment was, when she started arguing my baby's sex based on my belly (seriously?!), I said, "Are you trying to feel her genitals through my stomach or something?!" She still didn't pick up on the discomfort...

Valentinaaaa22 · August 2014

I have yet to encounter belly rubbers. Thankfully ! A little while back I saw this shirt and thought it was perfect

kristajo80 · August 2014

My husband got me this shirt... Perfect haha

BabyRN2009 · August 2014

I personally don't mind, however, any hand lingering longer than 10 seconds just feels awkward! (Time it...10 seconds is a long time when you're just rubbing a belly, lol!)

LinziLoo09 · August 2014

Oh my God I LOVE those shirts. I need to stock up on those! @BabyRN2009 - 10 seconds is definitely longer than it seems. This girl literally had a 5 minute full conversation while rubbing my stomach with both hands. You couldn't have made it more uncomfortable if you tried.

Shortstack06 · August 2014

I would have stepped away. My MIL has been constantly coming up and PATTING, not rubbing and it is weird. I finally told her to stop after me continuously backing up didn't register. My husband just laughs it off, but from now on I am going to tell people to rub his too, since he helped create baby they can all endure the awkwardness of it all.

leoandethansmom · August 2014

Yuck. There are these 2 ladies at my work that love to belly touch. I really don't get it, never have I ever seen a pregnant woman and wanted to touch her. I have serious personal space issues and I very much dislike touching people/people touching me. There's this creeeeeeeepy regular at my work who is here every weekend and I avoid him at all costs because he hugs me every time, lingers, and asks how I'm feeling. With DS I was walking into Walgreens in the third tri sometime and this random girl walks up and starts rubbing my belly telling me I was beautiful. I was too stunned to even respond so I just stood there with a look of shock on my face while DH laughed at me. AWKWARD!

LinziLoo09 · August 2014

@Shortstack06 - I was thinking the exact same thing last night --- to recommend that everyone pet DH's stomach too so he doesn't feel left out. He seems to understand both sides: why people would want to rub a belly and why it might be inappropriate. But I think he leans more towards the pro-belly-pat side. It would be nice to share the discomfort. My misery likes company

Shortstack06 · August 2014

@LinziLoo09‌ I feel it would be more awkward for the person doing the rubbing/patting so they might get the hint lol

cookieslove1 · August 2014

Valentinaaaa22 said:
I have yet to encounter belly rubbers. Thankfully ! A little while back I saw this shirt and thought it was perfect

This is awesome!

path75 · August 2014

I know I will experience this at work. I work with a lot of women who are just nosy. I had a hernia which was a bump in my upper abdomen and had two women touch it. I am like that is not a bump lol. Glad thats gone now but I can only imagine once I start showing.

LinziLoo09 · August 2014

path75 said:

I know I will experience this at work. I work with a lot of women who are just nosy. I had a hernia which was a bump in my upper abdomen and had two women touch it. I am like that is not a bump lol. Glad thats gone now but I can only imagine once I start showing.

Oh my gosh! They rubbed your hernia?! Was it a boy or a girl? What did you name it?

path75 · August 2014

LinziLoo09 said:

path75 said:

I know I will experience this at work. I work with a lot of women who are just nosy. I had a hernia which was a bump in my upper abdomen and had two women touch it. I am like that is not a bump lol. Glad thats gone now but I can only imagine once I start showing.

Oh my gosh! They rubbed your hernia?! Was it a boy or a girl? What did you name it?

Yeah that was bit embarassing to say the least. I really don't think they got it either. I think it was a unicorn.

desireeariel · August 2014

I only let family touch it. Anyone else will be swatted.

add: My mom asks me to lift my shirt and show her my belly all the time. I just give her an evil stare and walk away.

Attack of the Belly Rubbers!

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