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December 2014 Moms
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How I turned a Spa day into a headache (long)

abcmom12abcmom12 member
edited August 2014 in December 2014 Moms

So my DH's 5yr married/10yrs together anniversary is this Sat.  We agreed the kindle we bought a month ago would be our gift to eachother as it was very $$ and not something we needed.  Needless to say, with my preggo brain, I even FORGOT it was almost my anniversary.  Hence why on Monday, when DH gave me a card, I had no frickin idea why!  Besides the card making me almost cry, inside were directions to a..wait for it, a Spa!

He bought me a full day (6hr) spa treatment package which includes: massage, lunch, hair wash n style, mani, pedi, body scrub, facial, and cosmestic application.  Cause I'm pregnant, they removed the body scrub in lieu of cover my tips for everyone.  I was both deeply moved by the gesture and pissed he spent $300 on this.

Fast forward and I've building myself into a state of anxiety.  I don't let people touch my feet.  EVER. I have horrible feet with no toenails practically and a left heel that is permantly being stipped of callouses and bares mini scabs.  So...I didn't want the pedi.  I also don't wear makeup.  EVER.  Unless it's an event with pictures like a wedding or something.  Haven't worn makeup in 10yrs (hubby HATES it!) and my skin now breaks out if I wear anything besides concealer and light powder.  So not into the cosmetic bit.  Don't care about my hair, my nails are short (don't know why they're not growing this time) and I don't do the shellac or fake nail stuff.  As a contact wearer, long nails don't work for me.

All I'd really love is the massage and maybe the mani.  So I called to check the massage beds could accomodate a pregant woman, all the while secretly hoping they couldn't and we could get the money back with blame on the salon.  Nope, they're good.  I did manage to convert the pedi into a full cut and parafin treatment for my hands and feet instead but that left me with almost $40 of "credit".  Thanks....plus, lunch is from a shitty take-out place.

Part of me wishes my husband hadn't spent all this money we could've used to pay back my parents for DD's bedroom furniture on something I don't even want hald of, much less care about.  I wish I knew why he thought I'd care of about this stuff anyway; after 10yrs he knows about my feet thing and whines when I even put on tinted lip-gloss.  Yet I can't tell him this else he'll be pissed and really hurt.  

My enthusiam has turned into a heavy ball in my stomach. :( WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?!   Am I wrong for feeling this way or is this just hormones?

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Re: How I turned a Spa day into a headache (long)

  • blessdtxasblessdtxas member
    I understand wanting to be frugal, but sounds like your DH was just trying to do something nice for you. I wouldn't say anything, but that's just me. I think it would crush my husband if I told him I didn't like the gift he got me.

    DS1: 12/17/2014
    DS2: born sleeping at 26 weeks on 8/8/2016 due to chromosomal deletion
    Pregnant with baby 3 -  EDD 9/14/2017

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  • abcmom12abcmom12 member

    I'm not breathing a word of this to him, because the gesture really did touch me.  Stunned is the better word choice.  He loves that I totally blanked on the date too.  He's the type to go big or go home sometimes and it's always when we are the less secure financially lol

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  • hollycnhollycn member
    It kind of seems like what's done is already done. Even if the gift is not really your style, I think you would get a lot more out of the situation trying to stress less and enjoy it more.

    I don't think I would say anything to my hubby either just because I can't imagine he didn't mean well.
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  • Eora3Eora3 member
    Aw! Maybe ask if you can switch it out for a few pregnancy massages instead. Then tell your DH how you have secretly been dying for massages and you hope he doesn't mind that you jumped at the chance to get a couple more.

    I am betting the Spa just sold the package as a "Spa day" and he didn't really read up on what it all included.
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  • abcmom12abcmom12 member
    edited August 2014
    Eora3 said:
    I am betting the Spa just sold the package as a "Spa day" and he didn't really read up on what it all included.
    didn't think of that cause that's exactly what he'd do..gawd, what a first world problem.  I'm such a bitch for even complaining.

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers

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  • Eora3Eora3 member
    abcmom12 said:


    Eora3 said:



    I am betting the Spa just sold the package as a "Spa day" and he didn't really read up on what it all included.

    didn't think of that cause that's exactly what he'd do..gawd, what a first world problem.  I'm such a bitch for even complaining.


    You are not being a bitch! I would be confused too if my DH bought me something like that. However, having purchased a few spa packages myself, it is often surprisingly difficult to get the spa to specify what is actually included.
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  • CandEChicagoCandEChicago member
    Can you put the $40 credit to a longer massage time or some upgraded features for the massage?  He probably bought it as part of a package deal and did not know that you could swap out the services.  Otherwise, that sounds like a good price.  

    If you can't use the $40 credit during this upcoming visit can you put it to eyebrows, waxing or a manicure in the future?


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  • abcmom12abcmom12 member
    CandEChicago said:
    Can you put the $40 credit to a longer massage time or some upgraded features for the massage?  He probably bought it as part of a package deal and did not know that you could swap out the services.  Otherwise, that sounds like a good price.  

    If you can't use the $40 credit during this upcoming visit can you put it to eyebrows, waxing or a manicure in the future?
    yes, I figured I'd save it for the 30min massage for later in the pregnancy.  30mins there is only $46 bucks and I'd sure it'd feel real good in the 3rd trimester

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers

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  • SereJaneSereJane member
    What a sweet hubby! I hope you end up enjoying your massage, I've really liked going in for prenatal massage, especially since I used to sleep on my stomach. They have a big pillow with the belly cut out so I can lay on my stomach and it is awesome!
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  • jenkellenjenkellen member
    What if you used the $40 to book a massage for your husband?

    Also...pedis freak me out too...I dont know why!

    "It's, not, where you are, it's where you're going,
    And it's, not, about the things you've done, it's what you're doing, now"
    TTC Journey Began 8/12
    BFP #1 11/9/12, MMC/D&C 12/21/12 @ 9w2d, EDD 7/24/13
    SAs: 2%-3% Morph - RE Official Diagnosis     Unexplained
     BFN = IUI #1 (Clomid) | IUI #2 (Letrozole) 
    BFP #2 4/19/14 = IUI #3 (Letrozole)
    Expecting Our Elf 12/27/14
    ~All Welcome~

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  • abcmom12abcmom12 member

    spaw day was great!  the massage and facial were sooooo relaxing but by 3pm I was exhausted lol  didn't help that DD woke us up at 640 and wouldn't go back to bed.

    great thing was it wasn't on a giftcard like they thought, so they refunded the difference and I left a happy camper!

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers

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