August 2014 Moms

Feeling guilty

So my original plan was to work until the 24th of August and I'm due the 27th.....all of that sounded perfectly fine until last week.  I had an extremely easy pregnancy and nothing was uncomfortable or really hard until 36 weeks hit. Then pregnancy all the sudden sucked.  It's come as a HUGE shock.  I told my boss today that I just cannot work past Sunday this week, I hate to only give a week notice, but I just can't. 

I'm a CNA at a nursing home where I am constantly on my feet, showering residents, lifting them, dressing, changing, pushing wheelchairs, doing their laundry, etc. It's also not the type of job where I can just "take a break" my residents and co workers depend on me to be able to timely do my job, and I just can't push my body any further.  I end up out of breath, heart pounding, tired, and exhausted throughout my shift, and by the end of my shift I nearly cry every car ride home. So I know this is the best plan of action for me and baby health wise emotionally and physically. I feel bad because I thought I could do it and feel like I'm failing myself, and I've made my co workers short staffed my remainder shifts....which sucks. ugh

Anyone else think they were going to be fine and then had a cold slap of reality shoved in their face? I was constantly being complemented on how well I was doing and now I just want to break. I think the hormones are getting to me. I'll go eat icecream and take a bath, that'll kinda make me feel better. Other mommas still working and don't think you should be?

Re: Feeling guilty

  • Yes- I have had a great pregnancy and could never understand all the complaints. I hit 36 weeks and thing got hard. I have a desk job so I am working until the end, although I used to exercise everyday and have recently stopped. I just can't anymore. If I didn't have a desk job I don't think I could do it.
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  • You're a champ for making it so far! Seriously! I'm so impressed. Is there any chance they could give you light duty for a couple of weeks? (Not that I don't fully believe you deserve a rest now buy in case finances/time off is an issue.) When I worked as a CNA in skilled care we definitely tried to accommodate moms-to-be.
  • novameh said:
    You're a champ for making it so far! Seriously! I'm so impressed. Is there any chance they could give you light duty for a couple of weeks? (Not that I don't fully believe you deserve a rest now buy in case finances/time off is an issue.) When I worked as a CNA in skilled care we definitely tried to accommodate moms-to-be.
    Thank you! and yes i probably could go light duty, but unfortunately they won't schedule another floor aide and the other aide just picks up the slack...which doesn't really do anything good for my co workers... loose loose at my facility. luckily our finances will be okay...ill only be short that last paycheck and at this point its not an issue. 
  • I've had a miserable pregnancy. Planned to work up until I couldn't...which happened to be today. This pelvic/hip pain is SO bad I can barely walk (and I'm not exaggerating). I work at a desk and just decided that the next 2 days (c section scheduled for Thursday) that I'm working from home. You're a FCKING CNA and you're still working?! Dude-kudos. That is already a very challenging job!! And to do it while pregnant? I would've quit 20 weeks ago. Be kind to yourself...you are clearly super human and should not feel bad! :)

    I'm sorry you hurt that badly! I hurt, but definitely not to the point of not being able to walk :( and thank you! all pregnant ladies are super human in my book!  I never thought pregnancy was all that hard, now that I've been there, I should have respected women years ago! super lady powers we have!

  • Really, you are incredible for doing that job pregnant and not. I stopped working 2 weeks ago after crying on my drive home every day for weeks. And I didn't have a physically demanding job like you. I felt guilty for a few days, but my baby's well being is more important than anything else and I know I did the right thing. Enjoy your time resting up and preparing for your baby!
  • Kudos to you! With my first baby, I ended up having to leave two weeks before she was born.  I fell down a flight of stairs at work three weeks before my due date and I started having prodromal labor.  My OB initially said that I could keep working as long as nothing changed.  A week later, I was just so hideously uncomfortable and my BP (which had always been higher than he wanted anyway) was so high, he said, "Nope, you're done," and ordered me onto bedrest.  And I worked overnights at a Hotel where I was usually the only Front Desk employee on duty! Nothing like short notice there, either. 

    I say, take your time off and enjoy it and don't feel guilty.  They've known you were going on leave for months at this point.  Yes, its happening a bit sooner than you had initially planned, but as far as pregnancy goes, there's always a bit of uncertainty surrounding this point!

                    We're Going to be a Family of 5!

    Lilypie - (PaHE) Lilypie - (4noI)

                                   Lilypie - (2q9u)


  • I think it is AMAZING you were still working! I started out as a CNA and am now a NP. I am still working walking the hospital hallways but thankful I don't do any lifting, bathing, etc.... You deserve a reward! I have planned on working up til my due date (22nd) but after the lack of sleep last night I just want to stop working today. Too bad my other coworker is on vacation or I would totally call in.

    Rest! You deserve it!
    TTC#1 11.1.2010 |  BFP 1.4.2011 | Benton Henry born 9.13.2011

    TTC #2 11.1.2013 | BFP 12.17.13 | Due Date 8.22.14


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  • My EDD is 8/28 and I was planning on working until 8/16 but I had to go out 7/21 because of high BP. It sucks to leave your coworkers short staffed, but you have to do what is best for you and baby.

    PS, I'm an NP so I know how physically demanding it is to be a CNA!!!!
  • You do not need to feel guilty. Physically demanding jobs such as yours are harder as you get closer to your due date! 

    I've got a 50/50 desk/physical job. I'm still putting in a full day's work but I have been mixing my desk and up and around moments more than I used to. I do need to sit more these days and the waddling makes it harder than it has been. I can't even imagine holding someone up or bathing them and such. You, girl, are a rockstar.
  • I wouldn't feel guilty.  I'm a nurse at a step-down unit, so extremely busy/physically demanding.  It seems like all the other pregnant ladies on the floor have basically worked up until they are in labor, and from what they say it sounded miserable.  I originally planned to work until 39 weeks, and I still am, but all of the sudden last week (36 wks) shit got real.  I called my MW and ended up giving my work one day notice that I would be going to 8 hour shifts instead of 12.  They will deal, and hopefully I won't go into labor on the floor and end up exhausted with tons of interventions like my coworkers.  You have to do what's best for you and your baby!
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  • Thanks so much ladies! August totally rocks! I'm so glad I found this board back in Feb! Can't believe it's been that long! you are all awesome!
  • What everyone else said ! I'm working until the end, but I have a desk job so while I'm uncomfortable, I'm not on my feet and doing physically demanding work. You are a rock star! Take care of yourself :)

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  • Agreed! Desk job here too. If I had to walk or lift anything heavier than a binder I'd be in trouble. Don't be so hard on yourself!
  • OP I think you are doing the right thing! Your priority should be taking care of yourself and your baby at this point. I know you hate to let your employer and coworkers down but it sounds like you wouldn't really be able to do the best job anyway at this point. Stick by you decision and take care of yourself!
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  • I agree with everyone here. I am a veterinarian and have been working with large animals- been walking 3-4 miles a day plus taking public transit and out of the house for 12+ hours. I was also going to work right up until I'm due because I only get 60 calendar days off but at 39 + 2 I had to stop. Now looking back on it I wish I would have stopped earlier! My feet and back feel so much better now and my stress level is way down! Hope she comes so tho so I don't have to go back to work when she's too small.
  • Seriously, that is amazing you made it this far at that active of a job! Don't beat yourself up, you said it yourself, this is the best choice for your own and baby's health.

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  • Kudos to you lasting this long as a CNA! Try not to feel guilty, you did a great job and tried your best. I'm just this week starting to be like "ugh, everyday life is just too much work", but I'm sticking it out because my job isn't as labor intensive as yours! Still kinda hoping for a 39 weeker though- come on super moon...
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  • Don't feel guilty. This is probably the last chance you will have to actually relax for years because after you have the baby you will always have someone to take care of. I am spoiled and took off my entire third trimester last time (I was commuting an hour each way and we moved during that time), and it was the best thing I ever did. I got a chance to really prepare everything and take tons of time to just relax. And I was working a desk job. I can't believe you were still doing a physically challenging job this long. If you can afford it don't feel guilty and just enjoy your time off!
  • I hit a wall at 36 weeks too...all of a sudden exhausted. I cant believe you have worked as a CNA for that long! U def need to rest up! I don't think I would have lasted that long in such a demanding job.
  • Super, super impressed. Do not feel bad at all!

    I thought I'd be working up until my due date. I quit in the first trimester. I was throwing up 6-8 times per day and just couldn't do it anymore. I felt guilty, but like you said, you have to do what's best for your health and that of your child.
    I'm being featured in a new pregnancy/motherhood blog during the month of October, so if you ever wanted to know more about my pregnancy, birth, and motherhood experiences than anyone ever should, check out my posts in the link below! :)

  • Cheers to you for working so hard for so long! But now it's time to rest.

    I started mat leave yesterday (2 weeks out), at my OB's recommendation. It feels weird for this Type A lady to be at home but I'm definitely still staying busy and not exactly relaxing ... Yet. But having the option to nap when I need to, or go for a walk, is feeling really good right about now.

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