Kids dad No help with 14 month old nd pregnant again. :/

lovemybabys13 · August 2014

m a a 24 year old stay at home mom with a 14 month old little girl nd also am 6½months pregnant.I live with my boyfriend/kids dad, we've been together for about 7 years nd he has 3 older children from a previous relationship nd he works from 2pm-12am. I feel so overwhelmed at times because she's always wanting me to carry her nd I can't get anything done. I ask him to keep an eye on her nd he acts like he can't control her, when she's always on her best behavior when he's home. He's always complaining about something nd the littlest things nd also gets frustrated when our daughters throwing a fit when I'm the one trying to calm her nd he's just sitting there telling me I'm not comforting her right or enough. So when I'm fed up nd tell him that it would be easier if he'd help His agruement is that he wasn't ready to be a dad (when he already has 3 !) So that its my fault nd I have to deal with it. But yet he'll play nd help out when he feels like it until she starts crying. If I am doing her hair nd she cries he tells me to stop nd babies her. Like I'm doing something wrong, so now she cries to get out of things. I'd think that he'd be understanding nd help with her now that I'm pregnant but No. He sees me struggling with her, in back pain, frustrated, nd in need of his help nd he just sits there playing the stupid Xbox360. Him nd his 12 year old make a mess, throwing wrapers nd soda bottles, cups nd plates around for me to clean up, as if it were easy for me to do. Also when I ask him for money to buy things for the baby, I have to explain why nd how much I need, never buying anything for myself. Nd he'll give me like 50$. When his other kids ask for money for everything he asks how much nd gives it to them no matter the amount.
I have bit my tongue nd not said anything to avoid having an argument but I get so frustrated nd when I do I can never talk cuz he's always "right". So its no use.
I feel so alone, unsupported nd like running away. I just need a break here nd then but he doesn't see that. He says I don't need one. Yet makes us leave to my moms for a couple of days when he's had it.
I might as well do it on my own cuz I feel like a single parent. :-<
I feel like I may go into labor early cuz of the stress nd feeling depressed.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

lovemybabys13 said:

m a a 24 year old stay at home mom with a 14 month old little girl nd also am 6½months pregnant.I live with my boyfriend/kids dad, we've been together for about 7 years nd he has 3 older children from a previous relationship nd he works from 2pm-12am. I feel so overwhelmed at times because she's always wanting me to carry her nd I can't get anything done. I ask him to keep an eye on her nd he acts like he can't control her, when she's always on her best behavior when he's home. He's always complaining about something nd the littlest things nd also gets frustrated when our daughters throwing a fit when I'm the one trying to calm her nd he's just sitting there telling me I'm not comforting her right or enough. So when I'm fed up nd tell him that it would be easier if he'd help His agruement is that he wasn't ready to be a dad (when he already has 3 !) So that its my fault nd I have to deal with it. But yet he'll play nd help out when he feels like it until she starts crying. If I am doing her hair nd she cries he tells me to stop nd babies her. Like I'm doing something wrong, so now she cries to get out of things. I'd think that he'd be understanding nd help with her now that I'm pregnant but No. He sees me struggling with her, in back pain, frustrated, nd in need of his help nd he just sits there playing the stupid Xbox360. Him nd his 12 year old make a mess, throwing wrapers nd soda bottles, cups nd plates around for me to clean up, as if it were easy for me to do. Also when I ask him for money to buy things for the baby, I have to explain why nd how much I need, never buying anything for myself. Nd he'll give me like 50$. When his other kids ask for money for everything he asks how much nd gives it to them no matter the amount. I have bit my tongue nd not said anything to avoid having an argument but I get so frustrated nd when I do I can never talk cuz he's always "right". So its no use. I feel so alone, unsupported nd like running away. I just need a break here nd then but he doesn't see that. He says I don't need one. Yet makes us leave to my moms for a couple of days when he's had it. I might as well do it on my own cuz I feel like a single parent. :-< I feel like I may go into labor early cuz of the stress nd feeling depressed.

That's a great big wall of text.

I wouldn't want to be with someone who has 4 kids and isn't ready to be a dad. Maybe someone else can offer better advice but I'd get the fuck out of there.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

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msdrdg · August 2014

Not sure if this is mud as this is your 1st post. But.....

First things first, you either need to leave him or have a serious come to Jesus talk with him. Let him know that his and his older children's behavior is not acceptable and you are not going to put up with it any more. Lay down some ground rules.

Second, the word is AND not ND. For the love of small furry animals, is it really that hard to type out an extra letter????

[Deleted User] · August 2014

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[Deleted User] · August 2014

I didn't see the whole makes her leave thing. WTF to that. I'd take your daughter and go stay with your mom if it's okay with her. It's not about you anymore. That type of environment isn't okay for your kids.

tattooedtragedy · August 2014

Why stay? It sounds miserable. I'm with PPs go move in with your mom.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

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Unknown · August 2014

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jesuisfatiguee · August 2014

If he refuses to hear you and step up, you need to get on with your life without him.

ggatlanta · August 2014

Tl:dr. Bored. Calling troll on this.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

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littlemermaid · August 2014

Wow, you know how to pick them. Great choice for a father to your DD and unborn child. So you noticed he wasn't much help with DD but then you go and get pregnant again. He wasn't ready to be a father with YOU because if he has 3 childrenso he's already a father. Pack your bags honey and go home to your mother.

Since you aren't married to him, take him to court and force him to pay you child support.

jesuisfatiguee · August 2014

littlemermaid said:

Wow, you know how to pick them. Great choice for a father to your DD and unborn child. So you noticed he wasn't much help with DD but then you go and get pregnant again. He wasn't ready to be a father with YOU because if he has 3 childrenso he's already a father. Pack your bags honey and go home to your mother.
Since you aren't married to him, take him to court and force him to pay you child support.

The bolded is actually a really shitty thing to say. I agree with your sentiments for the most part, but WHOA there.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

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jesuisfatiguee · August 2014

SweetTurnip said:

I in no way mean to minimize the struggle it is to be a single parent, but it sounds like that would be worlds better than the situation you're in. Trying to justify and ask permission for money to provide for your children? Getting kicked out whenever he doesn't feel like dealing with you and the kids? Other kids who don't respect you because he doesn't respect you? Nope.

As a single parent, I have to concur.

allrightmeow · August 2014

MUD!

Are you there Bumpgods? Its me, Meow.

Can you pretty please reinstate the mandatory waiting time to post for new accounts? Removing it has set off every troll signal near and far.

If this is real. Leave. It's not going to get better. And you were 12 when he had his first child? (assuming the 12 year old is his first) How old is this man child?!

jesuisfatiguee · August 2014

bunnyfungo said:

Tl;dr I feel bad because if this is real there is no way she's getting child support. They can only legally take 50% of his paycheck and if you're the second woman applying for it, it's highly likely, with that many kids, that he's tapped out.

This varies by state. In my state it's 20% of income per child, and a 50% cap.

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Kids dad No help with 14 month old nd pregnant again. :/

Re: Kids dad No help with 14 month old nd pregnant again. :/

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