WWYD? using an "antique" crib

aggiebug · August 2014

It turns out my ILs have saved the crib they used for DH and his brother just in case we want to use it. I have done some research and I know there are quite a few updates to safety standards that I would like to check on before I would be ok using it along with making sure it is all still sturdy. The problem is that they live in TX and I live in VA and I would prefer to be able to check it out before the lug it up here. Who knows how or when it would get here too.

WWYD?

AnotherSun · August 2014

Ask the ILs to measure the slates and check on the finish for you

wintersong139 · August 2014

AnotherSun said:

Ask the ILs to measure the slates and check on the finish for you

The only issue is, what if they get offended? My MIL tried not to seem offended, but when she offered me aspirin for a headache I made a comment saying that it was on a list of medicine my doctor said not to take, and she seemed to get defensive, like I was implying she was a bad mother because she took aspirin when she was pregnant. Maybe the in laws might feel a little offended that you think they did something unsafe for their baby?

If you think they are NOT likely to get defensive, though, I think the above is a good idea. Send you MIL a list of characteristics that you want in a crib, and have them check to see if it matches.

stefani103 · August 2014

ChickenOnSunday said:

Along with the slats and finish you will also need to secure the crib if it is a drop side crib. It sounds like a bigger headache than what it is worth.

This.

If not accepting is an option...

aggiebug · August 2014

Yeah I don't think MIL would get offended by FIL would. And DH is being quite no confrontational about this subject which doesn't help.

It does seem like its more of a hassle than it is worth, but its all about balancing feelings, safety (obvious priority) and convenience. I mean seriously its a 2 day drive and they have no current plans to come up here between now and then.

Maybe I could say they should let his younger brother use it since he is still in TX and let him and his future wife and baby deal with it. Is that mean? I mean he isn't even dating anyone currently

wintersong139 · August 2014

I don't think it is worth a 2 day drive to get a crib, ever. So, that could be a legitimate excuse that would keep FIL from getting offended, especially if you present it to MIL first and let her spread the news.

ConstanceGoodspeed · August 2014

Email them a link to safety regulations such as this one:

https://www.babycenter.com/0_how-to-buy-a-crib_432.bc

This way they can see the regulations aren't coming from you; they are coming from research and industry professionals. If the crib is that important to them, they may be willing to do the work themselves to get it up to code.

DS was the fourth generation to sleep in his bassinet.

They sell kits to secure drop side style cribs. I added slats by removing the top and bottom rail, popping the slats loose, a few did break, and then rearrange them to be 2 3/8" apart (they were 2.5" apart so not a huge difference), adding in the new ones and used wood glue to insert them (wow that sounds more complicated than it was; it took me about an hour). It worked great and I was surprised at how meaningful and special it was to DH and I that DS got to sleep in it. Hopefully my grandchildren can be the fifth generation to use it.

umbcpt · August 2014

I'm also thinking, could you say, "Maybe it would be great if you could set it up at your house so we have a place to put LO when we come to visit and it could really minimize our stuff when we travel?" My ILs live in Florida (we're in MD) and they keep a pack n play at their house ever since DS was a baby. It made things a lot easier.

Or another alternative…

"We were planning on getting the crib that transitions into a toddler bed and then full size bed, so it will grow with baby"

Then their crib won't be a match.

Just my two cents

jennjilljo · August 2014

I love the ideas if setting it up at their house or pawning it off on the brother. If you have to take it than you can either bring it up to standards or set it up as a toy box. GL.

mishka29 · August 2014

Not sure if it was mentioned but the paint on the crib is another issue. So not worth the hassle when you can get one at ikea for less than $100

Beth.1212 · August 2014

I'd try to avoid the old crib. Personally, I think it'd be more hassle than it was worth. Life is busy enough without adding in projects that aren't meaningful to you or DH. If the previous suggestions don't work for you, you could say that you've fallen in love with a crib that you saw in the store (or a catalog, or the net) and have your heart set on that one. That would work with my in-laws.

mommy510 · August 2014

Ditto on setting it up at the IL's. That's what we did when my mom offered my old crib. Maybe your ILs would go for something like that, especially if they have other out of town grand babies that would be visiting. It's also super convenient for travelling.
I would think that the cost of moving it up to your place would be almost as expensive as buying a new crib.