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April 2014 Moms
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Am I the only one uninterested in sex?

kelbel2440kelbel2440 member
edited August 2014 in April 2014 Moms
I have no interest. Like zero. I do get turned on sometimes, but when it comes down to doing the deed, my legs cross before I can even think about it. Sex has always been painful for me, and we haven't had sex since I was 20 weeks preggo, so we are talking like 8.5 months. That's cuz DH became completely uninterested once The bump was there. So I think it's a ton of psychological issues on my side. And I don't know why but I just am not finding interest in DH right now. All I can think is that I'm tired, and feel like after taking care of the baby, and the animals, and the house... and whatever else, I just don't have the energy for that. I'm sure the answer is to talk to DH about it but right now it's just easier to not have intimacy. Anyone else?
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Re: Am I the only one uninterested in sex?

  • RedDawnsRevengeRedDawnsRevenge member
    I feel very asexual at the moment.
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  • Trgree1712Trgree1712 member
    You should talk to DH. Also I'm not always in the mood but will agree to sex when I'm not in the mood. More often than not once we start going at it I become more interested.
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  • SoulTerminationSoulTermination member
    Nope, definitely not the only one. I don't have much of a sex drive to begin with because, like you, it's usually painful for me. Then, after a 4th degree tear during labor, I'm not wanting anything of any sort going in or out of my vagina at this point. We tried at about 8-9 weeks PP, and it hurt so badly I was almost crying, plus my skin was so dry I started bleeding from the friction even with lube. Didn't happen then, and we haven't tried since. =/
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  • macynsnoopmacynsnoop member
    Ya you about summed it up for me. We actually DTD to try & get labor started so H has gone 4 months so far without any sexy business from me. I have no desire for it once baby is down for the night, dogs are fed & walked, housework is done etc. Normally it's bedtime by then anyway & I certainly don't feel like missing half an hour of sleep to have sex! H & I kinda made a deal that we would do it by 4 months, which is this week, so if we can find the time then I'll give it a shot I guess. I think it will be easier once baby is STTN, we are both just so exhausted all the time right now.
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  • JessimaxJessimax member
    Yah haven't had sex since the baby was born. I've never had a huge libido but it's 0 now. He gets the occasional BJ that's it.
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  • kelbel2440kelbel2440 member
    nicole mackenzie said:


    I rarely feel at all aroused. My mind is thinking about the baby, or that I'm hungry, or my breasts are over full, or... And the list goes on.

    I actually cringe a little when DH touches me. It's like I'm over stimulated from holding the baby all the time. And I can't see my breasts in a sexual way at all.

    This is definitely some of my issue!
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  • kelbel2440kelbel2440 member
    I had a csection so luckily didn't have the pp vaginal pain. However the last time we tried it's the most pain I ever felt. Usually it hurts really bad when startin and we just power through cuz eventually it feels ok. Last time he couldn't even get in cuz I was so clenched and pushing back.

    It also doesn't help that I'm probably pissed at DH 50% of the week cuz I just feel like he doesn't carry his weight around the house so I have to, plus I do the majority of care for LO. And it takes barely anything to set me off. Today for example DH said he would get up with LO so I could sleep in. LO woke at 6:45, DH got up, but since I had to feed him DH went back to bed and kept sleeping so I had to et up. He slept til 9am. That's enough to piss me off for the whole day cuz I'm fricking tired and it's my one day off from work. We've talked about all that, it's a lost cause now. So that all makes me completely uninterested in him.
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  • lokimaulokimau member
    Zero Sex Drive. We have sex once a week because it's better than listening to him whine about not getting any. But I have no interest or enjoyment from it.
    I think I am just touched out after being with the clingy snuggly baby all day.
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  • AmberLiz99AmberLiz99 member
    Ever since starting birth control I've had no interest. I'll still do it, but I'm never the one to start it lately
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  • kimberpookimberpoo member

    Yup, not a whole lot of interest in doing it over here either. Just too tired!!!!! Dh doesn't carry the load of LO all day so he doesn't understand, but he tries to be sympathetic. When we do have alone time if I'm rested enough and Dh is trying to be all romantic-like I'll go for it. Like PP even though I'm not interested at all once we start going at it usually I'll warm up and enjoy. If Dh never initiated things though we'd probably only have done it once or twice since LO arrived since I'm just so tired.

    I'm kinda like a diesel engine...very slow to start but great once you get me going! lol.

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  • Sisimama10Sisimama10 member
    I feel the exact same way.
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  • *sparky**sparky* member

    What is this sex thing you speak of?

    Seriously, I am so tired and touched out by the end of the day the last thing I am thinking of is getting physical with DH.  And I am still sensitive down there so I can't even convince myself that I may enjoy it even if I don't feel like doing it.

     

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  • Merlyna04Merlyna04 member
    edited August 2014
    It hurts so much !
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  • mammasuzelovmammasuzelov member
    I feel so exhausted at the end if the day, not to mention I usually don't get a moment to myself all day. So the last thing on my mind is sex. All I want to do is lose myself in a little perezhilton and fall asleep as quick as possible so I get maximum sleep.

    I also have some serious body issues atm, my stomach still has a pooch, and so many stretch marks (think tiger stripes) and then my big scary scar across my stomach from the emergency cs.

    I've lost that loving feeling so to speak.
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  • kelbel2440kelbel2440 member
    SuzanneOlov said:


    I also have some serious body issues atm, my stomach still has a pooch, and so many stretch marks (think tiger stripes) and then my big scary scar across my stomach from the emergency cs.

    I've lost that loving feeling so to speak.

    Ugghhh, tell me about it.
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  • dmosquera4dmosquera4 member
    ahhh nooo, im with you sister, i get in the mood at weird times when DH is at work and that doesnt help and at night he goes to sleep early and when i wanna do it it doesnt happen plus when i say im in the mood, i wish it could be done and done really fast like a genie fast.

    we have only done it once since LO has been born and it hurt i felt like a virgin again and i didnt enjoy my self i did it for DH 



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  • Yogini6911Yogini6911 member
    Yea same here. I feel like by the time that I have put DS to bed, cleaned the pump parts and bottles, packed everything for the next day...when I do have a free moment I just want to sit and relax. Nothing is more annoying then when DH says "I thought that you were coming over here to love me, give me a massage, or...." Ugh never a free moment...
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  • juniper75juniper75 member
    Same here. No interest at all. I finally gave in and DTD this weekend twice to make DH happy and all I could think about was getting it over with quickly. Like most of you ladies I am just too tired and touched out from taking care of babies all day long. I can't stand DH touching my boobs while I am still nursing - I just can't have them be sexual objects and LO's foodsource all at the same time. I have told DH this but he doesn't understand and is all over them anyways. It's such a turn off for me it kills whatever libido I manage to work up...
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  • LaNorteLaNorte member
    Here too, though I can't really pinpoint exactly why. I just don't want to. Before pregnancy we had pretty regular sex. During pregnancy, we had tons and tons of sex, all the way up until delivery. And now I just have zero interest. It's not pain (I had a csection), it's not even that I'm too tired. Maybe just a little touched out? I don't know.
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  • kmos816kmos816 member
    I'm interested in it but there is never time- by the time we have time I'm too tired. We had way more sex when I was still on maternity leave (by way more I mean once or twice a week); now that I'm back at work it just hasn't happened.
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  • nycgirlkatnycgirlkat member
    I have zero interest too. We didn't have sex (or even fool around) while I was pregnant. It made DH nervous plus his libido was running low. Then 2 weeks after LO was born he was chasing me around the house!!! I was like, back off guy! I had a c-section, LO was colicky, diagnosed with PPD and I was exhausted (and still wearing the same clothes I came home from the hospital in! Also my PPD was not helping either.

    I feel as if life hasn't changed much for DH. He doesn't help much in the care for LO (I can't even take a nap if the two of them are home together), so for him, daily life is unchanged. Now not only do I care for LO, I work outside the home too. So I have double the responsibility, I'm up in the middle of the night still feeding LO on top of keeping the house/laundry clean and bills paid. And yet he is baffled by the fact that I have no interest!!!!

    HELLO?!?!? Pitch in, you lazy-ass and stop whining about how you think your DD doesn't like you. Newsflash!!! If you spent time with her, she'd know you better!!
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