MMC Newbie d&c vs pill opinions

uromys · August 2014

I'm coming to terms with everything, but am surprised as to how hard it is to make a discussion. I have three woman and my practice and not a single one of them is on the same page. I'll be leaving them after this but that's a story for another time. After having to ask I get a second ultrasound I got the confirmation Friday that I suffered a MMC at 7 weeks. Now I'm faced with a decision I am having issues making.
The thought of inducing a miscarriage on myself with a pill and having to pass everything is making me ill. Dr #1 says it has the possibility of not working fully and needing a d&c anyways. I've herd horror stories of the pain, excessive bleeding, and nausea that can come along with it. She said wait for my body to do it in its own. It's been three weeks now.
Dr #2 highly recommends a D&C. I called and scheduled it for tomorrow morning however Dr #3 called to confirm and said she disagrees with the d&c completely. "It's invasive and excruciatingly painful. Not what I recommend but it's your choice."
So what it comes down to is I'm in search of someone who may have experienced both. Which did you prefer? I know none of this is ideal, but it's come to the point where I need to do something.

Thank you for taking the time to read all that ladies. I know this isn't where we all want to be. I'm sorry for your losses.

MrsGoody428 · August 2014

First, I am so sorry for your loss. I've been faced with the same decision twice now. I cannot tell you what to do, but I can share my experience. I chose on 2 occasions to have the D&C. My reasoning was similar to yours. Because I was 10 and 11weeks, respectively, I was terrified I would "see something" if I passed it naturally or with medication. I didn't want to "wait it out," I needed physical closure to start my emotional closure. My OB said the same thing about the miso, that it can be extremely painful, and may result in a D&C anyway. For all of those reasons, I chose the D&C and I am content with that decision. Again I cannot tell you which path is right for u. I hope this helps in some way. ((HUGS))

LaRomana09 · August 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss, and that your doctors are making everything more difficult. I had a MMC at 9 weeks (found at 10 weeks) and I chose to have a D&C. My sister had experienced all 3 and she highly recommended the D&C. I am honestly shocked that your doctor told you it's excruciatingly painful. You are under some form of anesthesia during the procedure and you don't feel (or remember) anything, and from what I have heard, most people only have some cramping afterwards. Honestly, the worst part for me was just waiting for it. It was very easy physically and I felt like it was the right decision for me. Good luck with deciding what is right for you.

Km380 · August 2014

I'm so sorry on top of the loss you're dealing with different opinions. I can't tell you what to do but I can tell you my experience. My first mc I went through naturally. It was a fairly early loss. My body recognized it and I started bleeding within a few days of it being confirmed. I will be honest with you there was a lot of bleeding and about half a day that I was in a lot of pain. But not so much that I needed more than Advil. My 2nd loss was a little further along and I made the decision immediately for a d&c. The majority of that decision was actually emotional, my losses were very close together and I think that factored into it. Mh and I both just wanted to have it be over for lack of a better term. Recovery from the d&c was fairly easy physically, few days on the couch with Advil. But again I was in pain before hand because I had to wait a few days to get scheduled. Everyone is different though, a d&c is surgery with anesthesia. I hope that helps a little and you can reach the decision that is best for you.

jennadesigns · August 2014

I'm sorry for your loss and that you find yourself here. I have had two D&Cs after having MMC. Mine were done at my doctor's office with twilight sedation (you're awake but have no memory of the procedure). Mine were not painful at all, over in a few minutes, and I spent the rest of each day lying low and taking some advil for light cramping. I bled for about a week after each one. The first one I bled heavily and the second one I barely bled at all. I can't speak to going the pill route, but for me, I knew I wanted to just get it over with and not take the chance that I'd need a D&C anyway if the pills failed to work. I hope whatever you decide that it's easy on you physically. Hugs.

farniegal · August 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. I also suffered a mmc. Since I was under 8 weeks my doc and I decided to go with the pill. Or was not a pleasant experience, I don't imagine any option is...
It worked on me and I only had a tiny piece of retained tissue went I went in for my follow up u/s and it passed the next day.
For me I wanted to reduce my risk of scarring and preferred to be at home, rather than a clinical setting- I figured out would be a better emotional fit for me. A d&c was also far more costly. Based on all these factors I opted for the the pills. My doc reported excellent results for her patients user 8 weeks who used the the meds...and I trusted her opinion.

It's a very personal choice that only you (and your doc) can make for you. In hindsight, I would still choose the pills.

T&P

farniegal · August 2014

Ps there is more info and support on the miscarriage and loss board. It's under the specialty boards, I recommend checking it out.

ashleyshedd · August 2014

First off, I'm so sorry for your loss and that your doctors are contradicting themselves. With my first two losses I chose to have a D&C. Well the first time I chose because pills don't usually work on me. The second I did not have a choice. I was 10 weeks and my body wasn't doing what it was "supposed to do" in that situation. Both times I had light cramping and bled like AF. And I had one under full anesthesia and one where I was awake. Ultimately the choice is up to you but I'm very sorry you are even in a place where you have to make this choice.

rubysi · August 2014

Welcome. I am sorry for your loss. I had a mmc at 11w, measuring around 7. I went for the pill option mostly for financial reasons. I won't lie it was a very messy and painful 8 hrs. It was successful for me, no retained tissue. Do what is best for you.

paintdadanta · August 2014

I'm sorry for your loss. This type of decision is hard and one no one should have to make. For my MMC, I was given cytotec 3x and an in-office D&C. Despite the failure of cytotec to complete it, I would rather do it again if I were in that unfortunate situation a second time. I felt that it gave me more closure and I was able to do it at home with my husband. I did have excessive bleeding and it was rough, but no method is good - statistically it has an 85% success rate. As far as a D&C, if you have one under general anesthesia, the recovery and pain aspect aren't that bad considering. I do not recommend an in-office one under local anesthesia. My anesthetic failed and it was excruciating, I'd rather repeat back surgery 10x over than that ever again.

Just remember that no matter which one you pick that it is your decision and do not let one doctor or the other push you into something you are not comfortable with, unless it's medically necessary.

uromys · August 2014

Thank you ladies for all your support and opinions. It's been very helpful!

@CFearsy‌ emotionally I think the d&c is probably the best choice. Despite how terrified I am I just want it to be over so we can start to heal. I don't want to potentially have to do both or see what I'm passing. Part of me wishes my body would get the memo and just get things moving on its own, but no sign on that happening. Also, thank you for the thread suggestion. I'm heading to look it up right now.

You ladies have been very helpful and I look forward to joining in on your weekly posts. I have three fur babies I'm ready to show off! ;;)

LundleBean · August 2014

My options were a little different, so I couldn't really answer helpfully. I just wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss.

meredithcarole · August 2014

How awful for you to be faced with such ineptitude at such a vulnerable time. I am so sorry for your loss. For my mcc a D&C was the best option. It was not particularly painful and it gave me closure. Only you can decide what is best, but please don't let them scare you with misinformation.

eliida · August 2014

I am so sorry for your loss. I'm also sorry your doctors are further complicating your situation.

I had a D&C under local anesthetic--though I was all the way out and do not remember anything during the procedure. Despite the discomfort I have no regrets about this course of action. Physically I felt back to normal-ish within a week or so.

Please take care of yourself. As PPs have stated, only you know what's best. Your doctors shouldn't be pushing you into something you're not comfortable with.

stinybean · August 2014

I have no advice for you, but I would like to welcome you to the board. I'm so sorry for your loss.

purplehaze11 · August 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a d&c when I suffered a mmc at 15 weeks for my first loss. My most recent loss was at 6 weeks and my body passed some tissue on its own, so I chose the pill and it wasn't as bad as I feared, and did the trick for me this time.

rslh10 · August 2014

I am so sorry for your loss, welcome to the board.

LittleDucky · August 2014

** living child mentioned **

I am so sorry for your loss. I can't comment on waiting or doing medication, but I had a d&c and it was a very easy experience. I was about to go out of town by myself with my 3-year-old son and didn't want to end up miscarrying on the plane or in a hotel room, especially with DH not with me. I went in to the outpatient surgery unit at about 9am on a Thursday for my d&c and was out by noon. I felt absolutely nothing during the procedure. I felt fine afterwards and DH and I stopped for lunch on the way home. I took it easy the rest of that day but the next morning I was on a plane with DS and then that weekend I was all over the place traveling around with my family at an amusement park. I had a little bit of cramping but nothing worse than normal period cramps and I had (very minimal) spotting for about two weeks. I'm very glad I made the decision I did and got it over with.

beemaya83 · August 2014

***warning:Detailed description of my experience with pill" *** I am sorry for your loss. We are here for you and I hope you find this board helpful. I went through my first miscarriage in January. I was 9 weeks. I ended up opting for the pills. My doctor explained to me that I was still very early on the pregnancy and that this was the better option vs the D & C. In my personal experience, the whole process was not as bad as I imagined. The pills I used were vaginal. I inserted them at night before bed (the doctor warned no water/no bathroom for the night because this might affect the whole thing). I didn't feel much pain at all, just slight cramping. At around 5 am I went to used the bathroom and what felt like a clot came out. Again, not painful. For the next three days I experienced heavy bleeding, just imagine a heavy period. My doctor said that at this stage, I wouldn't be able to see an actual fetus. Within 4 days I had another ultrasound to ensure everything was "out". Also, my doctor said that if the pill didn't work the first time, we could try a second time before during a D & C. I personally was really scared of the D & C as the doctor explained it was more invasive and I'd be awake the whole time. I hope this helps....

newfmom7 · August 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. I think the reasons you've given for a d&c are very valid. The process for me was unnecessarily dragged out. First they wanted me to try naturally and that wasn't working. Then they gave me misoprostol and that didn't do anything. Finally I had a d&c 2 months after my initial sign of miscarriage. Its by no means the easy way - there is no easy way; but it is the quickest way. Its a very personal decision and all ways end in the same devastating way. Sending lots of love and quick healing if you go through with it tomorrow.

Feegan · August 2014

First, I am so sorry for your loss. Having been faced with the same decision, I can share my experience: I opted for the pills to avoid scarring since we also face infertility issues and after 2 doses, had to get the D&C anyway because I was not passing everything. If ever faced with the decision again, I would do the D&C to avoid the drawn out, emotional process. (I will note that I still had retained tissue after the D&C and it passed naturally after my second post-loss cycle) Do what you feel is best for you and advocate for yourself to your doctors. Sending you so many hugs during this difficult time.

mogan92 · August 2014

I am so very sorry for your loss. I have only had one MC so far and I had a D&C. The reason I chose to go with that option is because my husband would be at work most of the time if I were to take the pill/MC naturally meaning I would be all alone at my house going through the MC process. Plus, we were stationed far away from our family at the time so I didn't have any support in that area. I also didn't think I could emotionally handle going through the process of miscarrying and seeing everything. It would have pushed me over the edge. When I had my D&C, I was anesthetized (I'm not sure if all other procedures are) and was sent home with pain meds, nausea meds, and IBU 800. I had little to no pain during my recovery. It was a quick way for me to get past the situation - not meaning this as "I'm getting over losing my child" but helping me move on from the depression more if that makes sense.

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