calling all teachers & working moms!!

AmyV416 · August 2014

Hey ladies! I haven't posted in a long, long time, however I'm seeking some support in going back to work in a few weeks. I teach 3rd grade. My day starts at around 8:15 and ends around 3:30. My mom and MIL will be watching my DD while I'm at school. I work literally 5 minutes from my home. I know I have the IDEAL working mom situation, but I have had some serious post partum anxiety. The thoughts of leaving her are the main source of the anxiety. With work rapidly approaching, I am a mess. I would love to hear how other teachers and working moms have made it all work out. How did you find the "balance"? Were your babies still bonded to you? I feel like she is going to love her over the top Italian grandmas more than me

Rrrrrachel · August 2014

Your baby knows who it's mommy is, I promise. It will have a special relationship with it's grandmas, but in addition to yours not instead of!

allyandmike24 · August 2014

The mama-baby relationship is really a physiological thing, not solely environmental. This article has some good background on how bonding occurs- you'll have so many wonderful opportunities to connect with your LO outside of the school day!! Feeding, cuddling, comforting are all times that oxytocin is produced which helps with bonding.

https://www.parenting.com/article/the-new-science-of-mother-baby-bonding

She'll love Grandma, of course, but she knows and loves you on a biological level which is so much more important to her.

Good luck with heading back to school

jenskurn · August 2014

I too teach 3rd grade and have a very Italian mother and babysitter. This is my second child. I will tell you that it is very hard to leave. I cried the entire day when I went back to work with my DD. But the emotional part of leaving gets easier every day. I am always a little sad to go and there are still days that I feel angry and resentful that I can't stay home, but for the most part I enjoy working again. DD LOVES her babysitter (she's one-on-one) and I'm sure DS will love her too, but that has never been the hard part. The truth is I find so much comfort in the fact that my kids are safe and love the person they are spending the day with. I was surprised about how much I wasn't jealous. Its exhausting and some days are harder than others, but it does get easier. G!

BGGP9196 · August 2014

When I went back after DD1 she was with family and I did miss her but I knew she was ok with family. It is really awesome to see how close she is with her aunts and grandma that watched her. But do not fear, your baby will absolutely know who momma is. I just went back afte DD2 and she is with family but DD1 is in daycare/preschool now and we both still cry at drop off every morning

angelaluisa · August 2014

BGGP9196 said:
I just went back afte DD2 and she is with family but DD1 is in daycare/preschool now and we both still cry at drop off every morning

Oh no! I'm going back to teach kindergarten starting Monday. We can't afford a nanny and my family is a but too far to watch LO so we settled for a daycare a mile away fromy work. DH will be watching LO for the first few weeks. SO not looking forward to the daycare drop-offs.

Also - anyone else worried about being able to get everything done? I never came home from work and just relaxed. I always had more work to do.

Dixon813 · August 2014

angelaluisa said:

BGGP9196 said:
I just went back afte DD2 and she is with family but DD1 is in daycare/preschool now and we both still cry at drop off every morning
Oh no! I'm going back to teach kindergarten starting Monday. We can't afford a nanny and my family is a but too far to watch LO so we settled for a daycare a mile away fromy work. DH will be watching LO for the first few weeks. SO not looking forward to the daycare drop-offs.

Also - anyone else worried about being able to get everything done? I never came home from work and just relaxed. I always had more work to do.

Yes! I teach high school and I have a bigger load this year (thankfully not until second semester...) and am always staying late/doing stuff at home. Not to mention any housework...

I seriously have started feeling to much anxiety mostly because it's ALMOST, but isn't, here! I'm one of those people that likes to plan everything, and this is something I can only plan so much - the rest will work itself out and it's driving me crazy.

Really, really trying to enjoy the next two weeks!

LaNorte · August 2014

I worry about this too, I teach band so I have tons of after school and late night stuff, especially in the fall. LO is actually doing daycare with one of my favorite student's mom who I know very well and trust completely.... But it's still giving me a lot of anxiety.

MissHSoonToBeMrsS · August 2014

I'm starting a new school so my anxiety is threw the roof! Through the roof?

woodstephanie · August 2014

We have a new principal this year, whick kinda stinks because i have worked really hard the past three years and have a solid reputation with my old one and my staff. now Im worried that she will think I am mot as driven/dedicated as I am. Oh well i guess priorities change. I am only going back one day a week this year (thank god) So that is my saving grace anxiety wise. I don't know how I would do full time with the lack of sleep.

lmac2582 · August 2014

I'm not a teacher but I went back to work a little over a month ago now and the first day is the worst day. DD goes to an in home daycare and her sitter lovesss her that makes it a little easier. I only see DD a total of about 2.5 hours a day through the week. About 30 min in the morning feeding and changing her before drop off and about 2 hours at night by the time I get home, change and eat. She goes to bed around 8 so I spend all my time with her until after I put her to bed and then I do dishes, laundry etc before going to bed to do it all again the next day. I resent having weekend plans with family etc because I don't want to put her down on the weekends!

speechie517 · August 2014

I work in a school and do home visits afterwards, so B will be at daycare from 7:30- 5:15 every day. I'm snuggling her on the sofa crying about it right now since we start tomorrow. I don't know how I will get things done and maximize time with her.

Laroo0220 · August 2014

It's hard but you make it work. I had my son after my first year of teaching and the amount of time I spent at work after he was born was way less than the year bf. Priorities def change. I utilized my prep periods way more and got out of there as soon as I could every night. It's been 5 yrs since then and I honestly don't know how I made it work with dinner, dishes, house work, spending time with him and my husband and work stuff. I am having a really hard time this time around as well and am totally resentful of everyone who gets to stay home but its just not an option for me. You are super lucky your LO will be with family. We have to drop ours off at daycare which will be really hard. I've already had a few full on meltdowns over it.

Wow this was long. Sorry. Clearly a tough subject for me. I have 2 wks left

MalyJ · August 2014

Is there any way your SO can take your LO? Being the one to physically leave your LO is the hardest part!

JessieAlbin · August 2014

I work almost double the amount DH does, and my little guy has the biggest smiles and giggles for me. His daddy is actually a little jealous. He has a great relationship with him, but it is just different! Your baby will still be head over heels for you.

Kriztyn · August 2014

Ugh... this post makes me sad!! I have 2 weeks until School starts and I am DREADING it!!!!! It's not helping that LO is going through the 4 month sleep regression so we are ALL exhausted these days. It's going to be hard...

I'll probably get a lot of speeding tickets on my way home....

RocksInTheWater · August 2014

I also go back to work in 2 weeks. The DC we chose is a block from my school (which is a 20-25 min commute from my house) so I feel lucky I'll at least have car time with DS. I will have no time between drop off and getting to work that first day to pull myself together. I so wish DH could do drop off. It would be so much easier.

Laroo0220 · August 2014

My dh is doing drop offs which I am sooooo thankful of. I had to do them when ds was a baby and it was really hard.

rainy369 · August 2014

I start back to school in two weeks and dd will be staying with my mil. I'm so happy that she will be with her grandmother but I'm still having a hard time with just the thought of leaving her. Dh said that he will drop her off the first few times to help make it easisr on me.

Teachers who breastfed, I was wondering how you are planning on pumping during the school day. I cannot figure out how I will find the time.

Dixon813 · August 2014

rainy369 said:
I start back to school in two weeks and dd will be staying with my mil. I'm so happy that she will be with her grandmother but I'm still having a hard time with just the thought of leaving her. Dh said that he will drop her off the first few times to help make it easisr on me.

Teachers who breastfed, I was wondering how you are planning on pumping during the school day. I cannot figure out how I will find the time.

I'm planning on pumping when I get to work before classes start, during my lunch (10:30 ish) and planning (12:45 ish). I do have an extra planning the first semester in the morning, so I may try to squeeze another pump session - we'll see.

I asked my principal before I went on mat leave for my lunch and planning to be separated (not back to back) so I could pump and thankfully he granted that request!

Twirple · August 2014

I started back at work a few weeks ago. It is a bit easier for me because Carlene is going to the same daycare that DS has been going to since he was four months old. You will find a new balance.

I make sure I have time to snuggle with both kids in the morning, even if it is just for a few minutes. For Carlene, it is her nursing time, then I put her down and have morning snuggles with Chase and we watch 5 minute cartoons on YouTube. Then I drop them off at daycare and head to work.

When I get home, I immediately put away the pumped milk from the day and then nurse Carlene and spend a few minutes coloring, or doing puzzles, or reading to Chase. Carlene cluster feeds in the evenings, so I my not get much cleaning done. DH helps with the laundry, I cook and he does the dishes.

The diaper bag is packed the night before, and clothes for both kids are laid out. The less I have to do in the morning, the better.

Sometimes the house is messy until the weekend because I have accepted that there just aren't enough hours in the day to do everything. My kids are fed, clothed and played with, so those are my priority, everything else is fluff.

(Not sure why the formatting is different on the second paragraph...strange)

Laroo0220 · August 2014

For pumping I am planning to pump after period 2, after lunch and right before I leave so roughly 10:00, 12:00, 2:00. I asked my lead teacher to make my preps spread out and she did thankfully!

mizzbeba · August 2014

How's the pumping while you drive working out? This actually crossed my mind this week.

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